Confidence help. Forced to be chubby and Not allowed to lose weight?

[Anonymous]

Hi ok so I'm in some major need of any encouraging words, or advise. Ok to start off with, I'm 5'4" and used to weigh 160 lbs. over the last 2 years I've been able to exercise and cut back on my unhealthy lifestyle and I've managed to get down to 130-131lbs. My problem is that my mom (who is overweight), won't let me lose anymore weight or she threatens to take me to the doctor for "anorexia" treatment. But I'm not anorexic and I'm far from underweight. Still my mom insists that I'm too "thin" (I'm actually really thick) I have a lot of chub on my tummy and I feel so fat at this weight. But I honestly can't lose weight (even behind her back) because she actually checks my weight now to make sure I'm not losing anymore! And if I lose even a pound (which would make me 129lbs) she freaks and makes me eat more or drink Boost. I don't want this to sound bad because she's not mean, and I know she's only concerned about me (because she used to be anorexic as a teen) But I guess my question is since I'm kinda forced to stay at this weight how can I increase my confidence and stop feeling fat and gross? Also, I'm 16 now so if I have to stay this weight to appease my mom for now, will I be able to lose this weight when I turn 18?

[xslope]

"Ok to start off with, I'm 5'4" and I've managed to get down to 130-131lbs."

Sounds perfectly normal weight without knowing your body type or build.

"My problem is that my mom (who is overweight), won't let me lose anymore weight or she threatens to take me to the doctor for "anorexia" treatment."

That is an empty threat, because you are not anorectic. Using your sex, age and height you would be anorectic when you are under 102lbs. Not saying that is a goal, but to point that it's not even close.

"Still my mom insists that I'm too "thin""

For who? For her?

"I don't want this to sound bad because she's not mean"

I am sure you don't want to talk ill about your mother, but she sounds one crazy b...

"and I know she's only concerned about me (because she used to be anorexic as a teen)"

Was she? Pics or it didn't happen! I'm guessing you have seen the pictures, right? I wouldn't trust her word on it because forcefeeding doesn't sound anything who has gone trough anorexia would do, because it could just create unhealthy relationship to the food. Either you get even more discusted by it or start overeating.

"But I guess my question is since I'm kinda forced to stay at this weight how can I increase my confidence and stop feeling fat and gross?"

Well you don't sound fat and gross but it doesn't really help if you feel so. I am tempted to give you a little cheating tip. Increase your exersizing. You will start to build muscle and it weights more than fat. So you can basically stay on that weight but since you build some muscle, your body gets more firm since I understood the chubby tummy was one of your main concerns.

"Also, I'm 16 now so if I have to stay this weight to appease my mom for now"

My parents wouldn't have got me to do anything I didn't like to do at that age, but we can't tell you how to manage your relationships with your parents. I think we all agree that you shouldn't be forced to do that just to please your mom. What does your dad think of it and could he be your ally in the matter?

"will I be able to lose this weight when I turn 18?"

Yes if you wan't to.

[Asker]

You have no idea how much I appreciate the extended answer. I never really thought about trying to build muscle so im gonna make that my goal. And, although it never occurred to me that she could be lying, I've never seen pictures where she looks sick or anything so I don't even know if she was. Thanks 🙂

[dem134]

Don't do it lose the weight and if she asks you to get on a scale put it on uneven ground that should make it off by a few pounds. ;-)

The game is to be told, not sold.

[DancingZombii]

Maybe you're mom fears for you getting anorexic. Just because there's no pics doesn't mean she's lying, IF i was ever in my life anorexic or had any eating disorder i wouldn't want my child to know, your mom could feel ashamed or maybe she is lying but either way you're not even 18 i don't know how old u are maybe you're 17 or whatever but thinking about losing weight is stupid at your/our age. You don't sound fat and so what if you are according to other people. Demi lovato's step-sister is fat and i think she's the prettiest even better than Demi. Thick people look better to me, I'm naturally skinny AND IT SUCKS! I envy girls with a thick body, they just look better in clothes. If you really want u could do what the dude said about getting muscles but i suggest not. I don't think it'll be a good idea, work on getting a little firm body and then love yourself. If you struggle with confidence a lot i have so many songs you should listen to them, like they're just amazing. Thick people are anyway the new in-thing, you'll regret changing yourself so young

[Anonymous]

lol my mom is the opposite lol! I'm also 16, 6'2 and I recently lost 5kgs because of my intensed studying.. thanks to it I don't have time to eat... anyway.. until my 12 I used to be super thin... maybe underweight but I was health , during teen age I literally doubled my weight in 2 years time... After a year of trying to equalibrate sweets and healthy food i finally start losing slowly weight.
Well.. in your case... When our body stop growing (its about 18-22 depends on the girl ) then we can't gain or lose easily weigh. biology stuff I know.. but my tip is that you should talk with her.. you maybe even concise her to go for running or walking together!

[Zendrya]

You can continue to lose weight as long as you are being healthy. She can take you to get treated but they'll just say there is nothing wrong with you.

[annoyymouse]

5'4 and 130 doesn't sound chubby. But if you really want to tone up, lift weights. It'll tone your muscles and since muscle weighs more that fat, you may not lose weight because of it

[xXiTacoXx]

If she wants to call for it just let her. Once they see that you're no where close to under weight/anorexia then she'll get the earful she deserves.

[heavensgift2girls]

Have your mom take you to the doctor, and have the doctor explain to your mother that you are not underweight, and that she needs to start allowing you to live a healthier lifestyle.

[BuchitaBuchys]

You're not fat nor chubby. I'm 4'11 and I'm around 125-130lbs.

I personally think you're weight is fine. But if you *must* get thinner, exercise would help.

[Drooogie4]

I'd say let her take you to the doctor so they can tell her she's insane.

[Other_Tommy_Wiseau]

why don't you do a sport? also, i don't think if she takes you to the doctor for "anorexia treatment" and ypou tell them why you're actually there, they'll keep or test you.

[OrdinaryGentleman]

She can't force the doctor to do anything to you. The doctor will say that you are in fact overweight and he won't force you to be put on treatment. Either way you are fine.

[Anonymous]

Tell your mom to fuck off and to get her fat ass on a treadmill. You do whatever you want, let her take you to the doctor. All he's gonna do is roast your mom for being a fat bitch.

[TrooperD007]

You can do whatever you want assuming your over 18.

I dunno what you look like, but 5'4 and at 120 you say? Sounds normal weight.