The big "I want to lose weight" conversation?

[Anonymous]

Hey :)

Me and my girlfriend were talking, and she seems really adamant to loose weight and go back to her size 8 dresses. I told her that she looks beautiful no matter what, and that she doesn't need to loose any weight, unless she really wants to (I have my moments :) ).

I've always been against peer pressure in regards to women "having" to loose weight to be liked, and she said that this has happened to her quite a bit. It's really upsetting me because I don't want her to feel like she is fat, she *so* isn't, I don't want her to feel like she *has* to loose weight but, on the other hand, I want her to know that I love her no matter what, and will support her if she wants to loose weight.

I've told her all this, and I'm not sure she is doing it solely for her own reasons. Obviously I just want to support her whatever she does, but I don't want her to be pushed around by peer pressure.

Arrrghhh! Help? :(

[mangageek]

I think peer pressure to be healthy weight is great and people should push each other more to lose weight, men and women. It is all positive until people get eating disorders but that is a small percentage of the time. Everyone should support each other in working out together and eating healthy, not just diets that they go on and off of but real lifestyle changes. I understand that being criticized for their weight makes people unhappy with themselves but that's sometimes the extra push they need if they aren't motivated enough to do it for themselves. I work out and eat very healthy to keep my bmi of 19 which is on the really low end of healthy and a clothes size of 0 and dress size of 3 or 4. I still have occasional sweets but my overall diet is very good and I dance to keep in great shape.

Btw what dress size is she and what height an weight? She might not be fat for her frame and not need to lose weight, depends.

Hope this helps!

[KarKingJack]

I'd have another talk with her, find out why she's really wanting to loose weight. It won't be purely for her own reasons, and nothing you say will desuade her, but you'll be able to get those problems out in the open and help her live more for her, perhaps. And certainly help her with her insecurities.

And then overall, support her. Everyone gets that pressure, so it can't be that bad. I mean, we all live to 80something now days, right? It won't do her harm, emotional or physical, and she'll feel really good about herself. =] And that'll benefit you, too. Bigtime.