Why am I still insecure after all I've achieved?

[ILuvBoost240sx]

I've been lifting for a year now and got huge but also fat. I've never really got attention from girls since my freshman year in high school. Well a few months ago started cutting weight and have attained a killer physique (not to brag). I get compliments all the time and girls are seriously paying waay more attention to me, and although my confidence feels like it's through the roof, I still can't muster the strength to make a move, even if a girl is clearly into me. It's as if I'm in the same boat as before.. It's been like 6 years now since I've had the confidence to flirt with any girl I like and I totally am a different person mentally now. I feel like I've been scarred when it comes to being able to flirt with girls and I'm in the best shape of my life! its killing me..

[heatherlu]

Not to go all text book budding psychiatrist on your ass, but I'm guess there's a little more to your lifting than looks. It's classic, fat girl got pretty - can't date a guy cuz now all he wants her for is her body, or geek got rich and chicks just dig his money syndrome. Getting in shape doesn't solve all your problems. And sure you might look great, and your basic level confidence is at an all time high, but there are still the more deep seated niggles. And no amount of lifting is going to change them.

Basically. You probably have a hell of a lot more going for you than your body mass and tone, you have to convince yourself of that. Then you'll be able to start believing other people can see that too.

[Levin]

Yep, it might also be interesting to note the potentiality to get into these activities as a form of escape from what really does need doing (namely, in this case, facing your demons, and gently easing back into approaching, speaking with, and trusting, women). Regardless it's still a great achievement and will aid you a plenty with the fairer sex! I can see heather lusting over your profile pic from here, so...

[ironeddie]

Congratulations on improving yourself.
But you can't put a coat of paint on a tree house and expect the inside to turn into a million dollar palatial estate.
You look better on the outside which will do wonders for parts of your self esteem. But not all of it. The way you see yourself inside and your outlook on things will still need working on.

The way I see it is you have 3 options here.
1. Just go flirt, talk to, or ask girls out. To get your confidence.
2. Get a book on cognitive therapy to improve your self esteem.
3. Do nothing and figure out a way to be happy where you are.