I've been invited to a party. I want to go, but I'm afraid. I'm a introvert and can't talk to people. What should I do?

Question

Ik parties are cool😭NGL I'm not a party person. Apparently I should do things that scare me in order to cure myself of my introversion. I'm confuse. How can I survive only knowing 2-3 people and being socially awkward/anxious?

Cripplingkingship · Accepted Answer

You don't need to go to parties to cure your social awkwardness or introversion. There plently of other ways to become more of a socialable person.

You can do public speaking, join in school/public debates. Go out and just talk to new people.

There are plenty of ways to improve your social skills, other than just one thing.

When they say they you should push yourself out of your comfort zone, it doesn't mean to go and do things, that you don't geniunely don't like. I don't like heights, it doesn't mean I need go jump out of a plane at 10 000 feet.

Pushing yourself out your comfort zone, doing things you wouldn't usually do, but you see as a benefit, rather than a terrifying experience.

I recommend just go out and talk to someone, you don't know at your work place or at school.

I was very shy with girls in my teens and 20s, so what I did to overcome that experience, I went strip clubs, because girls at these places, didn't care whether I was shy or not, they just wanted my money. Now I have no problems talking to girls.

Actually a lot of the girls, helped overcome my shyness in the strip clubs, gave me good advice, and were gave me more attention. Its all good now, I can talk and have sex with them

DrPepper12 · Accepted Answer

Good for you for facing the issue honestly and directly!! Have your wingwomen support you. Take unnecessary trips to the bathroom to give yourself a pep talk & assure yourself you are gorgeous and worthy. The hardest step is initiating a convo but this is a party and as a human you have commonalities with your fellow humans. There's a MILLION ways to do this. I liked the "Great / funky / unique / bold color for your nail 💅🏻 polish. Tbh it worked fantastically well as an ice breaker. It conveys A LOT of info in a few words. Good luck.

Crimsyjo · Accepted Answer

I hadn't gone out for 8 years and tbh I kinda like my own space and peace so I considered myself quite introverted. But as I wanted to put myself out there to make friends and maybe get a boyfriend I started going out this time last year. And it is hard at first. But you only get better at something or less nervous by doing it! That's what people mean by doing what scares you.

I've had those moments standing feeling alone and awkward in a crowd...

Now I love it.

But anyways back to you... you have some people there you know so stick with them. Maybe have some go to topics in mind to bring up if you feel stuck for conversation. Could be anything. Get upto date with latest news? Or a funny article? Or even read up on introverts then bring it up if you feel awkward to just be open about it. Like "oh I'm so not used to these places. I'm actually a bit of an introvert. But I read an article saying the only cure is to put yourself out there! So here I am!"

Honestly convo is a two way street so people will talk to you. And I can almost guarantee that pre-nerves are worse than actual and your find your groove in no time!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I am a lifelong introvert. I have never changed to suit what other people thought I should be like, because that's not who I am. I am fine with never being the life of the party, or being excited about parties, or with being forced into a bunch of chit chat. People have this illusion that you're sad and lonely and won't be successful if god forbid, you're not out in front. Quite the opposite. I go to parties when I want, and I give myself an hour or two and then I dip. I make a little small talk if I want to, or I just sit and try to enjoy the atmosphere. When I'm really into it, I go out and dance and do all the things. Be true to yourself, you'll always be much happier in that space, and only change if you want to or you feel like you need to.

Finchie40 · Answer

If you aren’t a party person then you are best not to go , you will be bored and think the party is lame , Some people just don’t like the party scene and don’t have fun with it. So if you are having anxiety about it , don’t put yourself in that situation , it’s best not to , now it’s your life and your decision whether you want to or not , I am just giving ya some advice , I have some friends’ that have severe anxiety and they never come to any of my party’s the few that did come ended up having fun but they didn’t stay for a long time , So if you do end up going , just make sure you have your own transportation so you can leave if you want to. Most parties are just people drinking and listening to music and eating , sometimes games are played as well , and sometime people hook up and make out. So if that sounds fun to you , then go for it

ohsheeT · Answer

This gave me the biggest smile because that was me

And I would go definitely would have to drink a little bit just so I could talk whatever you do don't get stoned LOl

So you're an introvert are you also an empath because those two combinations can be wild together

Just because of things that happened that you have no control of and if you don't understand then it's going to make you want to run but I think you'll do fine if that's you in your picture I think you have tons of people talking to you and you're just going to have to relax take a couple deep breaths and just remember just because they're looking deep into your eyes they're not thinking all the things that you think they're thinking LOL and that's why I'm curious to see if you're empath

Caroline91 · Answer

I am an introvert with an extrovert presentation. What I have found was that I was very self conscious when I was focused on myself and worried about how others would perceive me. Once I became aware of that, I have learned to shift my focus to the other person who I am talking to and really be interested in that person. That helped me a lot in party situations. It has never changed that being really social is draining and I need some recovery time. But I can attend parties and really enjoy them now.

Levin · Answer

I mean, you should take solace in the fact that you can't be as awkward as me, ha.

No, to be fair, I'm fairly well practicised and socially competent these days. Or at least, I can almost fake it.

You should follow your gut feeling that you want to go and that it will be fine. You know deep down you will be safe.

Then your mind and emotions get involved but they are false. Sounds like you might need to take it out or some counselling.

I also think you'll be very popular with the boys.

lightbulb27 · Answer

you are introvert but your photos say you are aggressive

I was quite introverted. I got over it by finding Christ so that I got over my fears and took interest in other people. I got past my hangups, learned to communicate and be ok with feeling awkard. It gets better.

you just have to do it and work on yourself.

Going to parties... not so sure, depends on the party. don't drink...

RingOfFire · Answer

Maybe ask yourself what's the worst that could happen? You're just as worthy as anyone else there, no less. And you can be sure that everyone has some of that social anxiety. Some just hide it better than others. We all have our insecurities. If you go there with an open mind and realize that nothing terrible is going to come of it no matter what you say or do it might be something to help you relax a little more. There may be more up side than down side so the risk is minimal.

If you don't enjoy it, just skip the next party. But maybe you will and it will open up a whole new world for you!

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

This Q&A is   then!

DryGermanGuy · Answer

Is it a costume party? You could go as a BDSM slave with a ball-gag. :-D

Curiouskitty99 · Answer

If you don’t want to go don’t do it. I’m an introvert and usually when I go to parties I cling to my friend. Later I usually drink at parties so I’m less awkward and shy

jamesgoldman · Answer

Have a drink or two N. b. Not too many I've just done that at the reunion last night (3 pints of cider, a cognac and Coca-Cola, a Jameson and ginger ale, a single malt and 9 vodka rocks)

LC230 · Answer

As a person who keeps to themselves a lot too parities are also not in my field of expertise.

I go out with friends and talk to them but I don't really talk to anyone else unless they come to me which they usually don't. However once a person outside of my small friend group gets me talking, there's no shutting me up so maybe that could be the same for you?

There's a difference between can't and won't talk to people, you can talk to people but you won't because you're shy (I'm also like this) you just kinda need to get over yourself in a good way. If a person looks at you just say Hi. I've done this the last couple of times, some people will just walk away others will say hi first then walk away and some will have a conversation with you.
It may work for you?

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Go, and look for other introverts. Stick around the bar or in the kitchen near the drinks. You’ll quickly figure who’s in the same boat as you (loner, white-knuckle drinkers 😂) Have one or two questions to ask like, what are you drinking, or are you here by yourself too?

Daniela1982 · Answer

Parties are not all that they are cracked up to be, especially if there is booze or drugs. I mean do you really want to hang out with a bunch of people who party their way through life? But, it's up to you.

lowkanymous · Answer

go with an extroverted friend if you can, they can carry the convo if you are shy but you can also meet people that they meet. ik it's hard rn, but the more you practice the easier it will be to talk to people. just remember to have fun and try not to be stressed, that'll make it harder. make sure to wear something you feel good in as well! i always say look good, feel good! have fun good luck girl

LostandFound__x · Answer

Embrace being an introvert you don’t need to change who you are. But it’s good to have people’s skills and I think it’s good to attend parties and similar events just for your personal development and mental health. If it makes things easier for you go with a friend.

Kayleigh2005 · Answer

Guys love talking about themselves just let them 😂

WhitneySnow · Answer

Go with a friend. That way you’ll have someone to talk to if you feel anxious.

call_me_scar · Answer

Do what I do and drink so it looks like your doing something and when something interesting does happen u can join in

BradleyScheff · Answer

Introversion is a personality trait. Not a disease that needs curing. But it would be a good idea to learn to talk to people and socialise when needed.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I hate parties (unless its a LAN party), if you don't want to go, then don't go.

Makeushiver · Answer

Because you'll see very few men as single parents but you do see a lot of women.

LiamJHayden · Answer

At most parties there will be at least one super extrovert who will take you under wing and intro you to everyone else.

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

Introvert doesn't mean you are afraid to go out it just means we are not willing to put that extra energy to do something that we don't want to do.

If you enjoy your own company you need not push yourself.

Only if you feel that you wanna meet people go out there is nothing stopping you.

Two things to remember be true to yourself and let others know your boundaries that's all it takes speak what you really feel donot sucumb to peer pressure.

Anonymous · Answer

Just dress nicely in the outfit you're rocking in your wallpaper pic and relax. You'll have PLENTY of people come up to start a conversation with you. You won't have to do a thing!

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

As someone a bit older than you, give some new things a shot and even try having some fun, for me, college parties weren't fun usually.

They're a mess just waiting for collapse. You're a girl, if you just relax and have a smile, is likely someone would talk to you

SuchSightsToShowYou · Answer

Go to the party.

If you get nervous, you can grab a tray of drinks and wander around asking people if they want a gin and tonic or whatever.

That way you can interact with people without feeling too self-conscious.

In_Trance · Answer

if you're afraid of snakes... sitting in a room full of snakes is not going to cure you.

Jessica405 · Answer

Just go along. Let people talk to you rathr than you approach them.

NathanDavis · Answer

there's always a seat or a sofa around... where the introverts do hang out with each other, and planned or not... avoid each other low key... lol

CarolinaGirl5 · Answer

You need to go because aren't you the same person who posted about a long distance relationship or some online relationship? How are you going to accomplish that when you can't even go to a party?

ThebestIndian · Answer

I actually am the same. I am the one who believes in introvert is not a fancy thing that you can brag about. Not at all. You should definitely go to the party. Make sure you hold a glass in your hand all the time to seem confident. Interact with people. I bet loads of men will come and try talking to you because you look sexy. Just talk to them and show some enthusiasm as well. Simple to be said, I know. but, give it a try.

Enjoy your party. Let me know how it works out for you.

Nikki1989 · Answer

You should still attend. It's okay to feel nervous, but don't let it stop you from enjoying yourself. Take it one step at a time, and focus on having fun.

Dan_Juliet02 · Answer

How close are you to the person who invited you to the party? If you’re both cool you can go

Lynx122 · Answer

If it's that uncomfortable don't go. You should try and challenge yourself but in small steps.

pascal_climbs · Answer

Always go. You never know who you will meet. Have a few drinks and when you are bored because of no contact, go home. At least you tried

rachel776 · Answer

take your 2 best friends with you and make them promise not to leave you unless you tell them to

Anonymous · Answer

I'm also an introvert, I guess we have the same issue.

red-lipstick-girl · Answer

BI was also shy, then I went to the concert and danced, and I came to my senses.

clampfan101 · Answer

As a fellow introvert, I say go and give it a chance. You can always leave if it’s too much. Just try your best.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

Talk with yourself, and enjoy the party? :)

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

Go and circulate, trying to small talk perhaps another shy person until you're comfortable.(I can relate as an introvert).

JohnK123 · Answer

Just stay with them if ur wanting to go? Take me with u I’ve never been to a party before haha

plundo · Answer

Just go tbh. I'm always kinda an introvert, but with some drings and the right vibe, it's always great. And if not, you can always leave

altaboy · Answer

Stay home and read a book. There's nothing wrong with being an introvert.

Kaantr · Answer

Utangaç olmayın. Sadece diğer insanların iyi insanlar olup olmadığını bilmeniz gerekir.

seeyounexttuesday · Answer

I'm socially awkward... here's my tits... lol.

kaucky1 · Answer

Parties they just wanna get you wasted to take advantage 🕳️💫🌀🫧💢

noohair · Answer

People like to talk about themselves. Ask questions and listen.

Sadia26 · Answer

I would say go. Once you start going you will get over it. Who knows maybe you will make new friends.

vj0090 · Answer

With that body features... ooh my.. u gonna rock

MasterKS · Answer

be what you are..

Liz1990 · Answer

Find those with similar interests go from their.

NightRaven7 · Answer

You can go to birthdays.

Staximus · Answer

Bring some friends with you

Anonymous · Answer

You dress like a hoe though. 💀

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

HAVE A DRINK... TAKE THE EDGE OFF

Wise4myage · Answer

Go with a friend?

kareka · Answer

Why are u afraid?

I've been invited to a party. I want to go, but I'm afraid. I'm a introvert and can't talk to people. What should I do?

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