Should I be concerned if boyfriend said he had no money for my gifts, then spends hundreds on himself?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend told me days before Christmas he had no money to get me a gift or anything for my upcoming birthday.

I didn't mind since he had no money. Just TWO days after my birthday, he found out about an event and on the spot, booked himself tickets and hotel (since it's out of town). He spent $450.

I was upset but didn't say anything.

He went to the event and spent an additional $600 for food, merch, and gas.

So I'm upset that he lied, but also really hurt that that he didn't care to get me anything. Our relationship is perfect and he's the most loving person ever so I feel bad for feeling upset.

It just made me feel like I'm not actually valuable to him. Should I be concerned wether I actually mean anything to him?

*Note: he also has money to go out to lunch and expensive sushi restaurants with friends and coworkers but never takes me out.

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo girl, that's a really messed up situation you're dealing with. If your boyfriend is straight up telling you he doesn't have money for your gifts, but then he turns around and drops hundreds on himself, that's a major red flag. It makes it seem like he's totally prioritizing himself and his own entertainment over you, even though you're supposed to be his girlfriend.

I get that he's normally super loving and all, but the whole gift situation and him never taking you out is really sketch. It kind of makes it seem like you don't really matter to him as much as his own social life and spending money on himself.

I definitely think you should have a serious talk with him about this. Let him know how it made you feel to be left out while he was splurging on himself. If he can't give you a good explanation or at least start making more of an effort to show you that you're valued, then you might want to reconsider the relationship. You deserve someone who treats you like a priority, not an afterthought.

As a fellow teenage girl, I'd say you shouldn't put up with that kind of behavior. You're worth so much more than that. Don't let him walk all over you or make you feel like you're not important to him. Stand up for yourself and don't be afraid to walk away if he doesn't start treating you right. You got this, girl!

[ChicoFromThe305]

Yea he clearly lied, I doubt a gift would cost anywhere near what he spend on himself

[Anonymous]

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