Most Helpful Opinions
I would never "wait" I would talk things through about these matters with my partner to make sure we're both on the same page... so there is no waiting per se, there's mutual planning and agreement50
If you have been together a steady 2 years I don't see why you really need to delay in asking. Most people stay engaged for a year which gives them. Time to save for the wedding and stuff. The heightened stress will really test you and you'll get to see whether you're able to stick it out.
Some might say 2 years is too soon.
But think you kind of know. The rest of time is basically just making a life together... getting a place to live etc etc.10
Never. I’m not too bothered about getting married but what I’ve said is if he produces a ring he better already have some serious plans in place for a big wedding and not just turn up with one without even saving
I’ve already been married but was never bothered about it. Last time we’d been together 5 years and had 2 kids I only did it because I wanted the same name as my kids10
What Girls & Guys Said
Sit down and talk to him... when you think of your future whats most important the proposal itself or the man putting the ring on your finger... he might be still trying to get in the position to be able to do that or their might be fears stopping him or you both might have two different beliefs meaning you dreamed of your wedding for years and he just thinks its just an expensive piece of paper.. talk to him see where his heads at and go from there!
Dont get in your head thinking whats wrong or what to do... just talk to him... Ask him where he sees you guys going can he see you as his wife? He might say you already are meaning he's happy comfortable with the way things are why have a wedding when its just a huge expense? Or thinking whats the point of marriage since no one lasts these days anyway... then you can express how much a wedding means to you.. then give him some space to think about it cause he had his mind made up.. can force a change of thought in a blink of an eye.. in a weeks time you could say have you given a wedding more thought cause thats something I am not willing to compromise on and if you dont want to get married in the next 3 years than please understand I love you but I can't stay in this relationship because I value the commitment of marriage its a day for us.. not just me! Make him involved in every part of the planning except the wedding dress!
Or you guys could split and he could come back after he sees how other women are these days. Or you could find the man better than your wildest dreams.. look at whatever happens as an advancement towards what you want. Just explain to him you can't stay friends because you still love him and thats a dangerous place to be you have to have your full attention ready for the man you will marry! Wish him good luck and part ways if it comes to that even still its not final but dont take him back unless he agrees to a wedding or your desire to have a wedding changes.
Take care of yourself! Remember its all in your approach on the topic! Good luck!10
It really depends on the couple. I know people who dated for 3 months, engaged for 3 more and now have been married for 30+ years.
I also know with the case of my ex, we dated for 2 years, engaged for 2 years and things still didn't work out.
Any notion that amount of time before getting engaged or for how long you should be engaged means success seems totally random.
With my current spouse, we dated for six months, engaged for six months been married almost 14 years.
I would never wait 7+ years, heck I think 1 year is too long.42
Your HAS or HAS NOT proposed?
Are you 25? Or 29? It makes a difference.
And are you saying the subject has not been discussed between you two?
Some peeps have no intention of EVER getting married. Are you giving him regular sex? Cuz that can either work FOR you or AGAINST you.
On the one hand, lack of sexual engagement means you've never properly bound him to you. He may feel you'll withhold, so it's a dealbreaker.
OTOH if he's getting free sex then there's no impetus to further engage you. The free milk and cow thing.2
he's got to go, stop wasting time, he has no love for you. he's trash. one thing is if he could not marry you for some reason, now not to propose? lit happens, sometimes people are prevented from marrying each other, it happens. but look, most times it does not take much to marry a person, there are many ways, you can just Pray and pronounce yourselves married and go live together, so I mean, send this rotten trash to bottom of the trash bin for no recycling. check if legally you can get anything from him, I mean 7 years is a very long time, in some places if you can prove a stable union, you have legal rights, take care of yourself.0
I met my ex wife on Jan 10, 1989. I went into the Air Force on 2/14/1989. I came home for a 3 day weekend May 25 and proposed. We lasted 25 years.
How long or quick doesn't matter if it is right. That said, If there is no proposal by either by the 2 yr mark, there probably won't be. So better to move on if marriage is important to you. It was to me.20
I really think 4-6 years range is good because by then you're definitely out of all the pure lust stuff and everybody has had time to think clearly and meet some relatives. But that said, from my male POV: you gotta prove that you're top shelf wife material. It's not that you're entitled to get asked just because of the length of time. If you were too slow/dumb to prove it... well that's going to cause delays.216
Play it by ear. Due to the change in culture, marriage can induce anxiety. Plus with covid, it's perfectly fine to get married in the courthouse and have a wedding later. My advice would be to plan a court date that's comfortable for both involved and have an honest talk about.
When that date is approaching and your partner is making excuses, then you know where you stand and you might have to make a difficult choice to stay and wait or leave and find someone marriage minded.10
Honestly I think everyone has their own timeline. My two good friends got engaged after 8 years together. My parents weren’t even dating a year before they got engaged and they’ve been happily married for 32 years. It’s up to you as a couple to gauge how soon is too soon etc.10
I think within 2 years you should know. Maybe 18 months. Maybe 12 months. If you don't know by that time, it is because marriage isn't on your mind and you are not looking for it. Someone who seriously wants it, is looking and analyzing. Anyone who waits 7 years better have a kid with them already.10
2 1/2 years max at this age. My best friend complains about her boyfriend that’s she’s been with for 6 years and they’ve had the conversation. I didn’t want to say leave him (that’s what I’d do) but I mean This man is not going to marry her she settled and at 29 that’s the worst thing to do.10
I would wait an eternity. Since I don't believe in the need of marriage. I it doesn't do anything for a guy in modern times but place a time bomb in his relationship. Like there isn't enough of those already.10
anywhere over 4/5 years is too long. And if you're with a guy who took 10 years to propose to you, he's just settling for you. Because any guy who is desperately head over heels in love with you would jump to propose as soon as possible.122
Not trying to tell you and your partner what to do, but the longer the engagement the better. Marriage is good but people rush into it and it takes so much planning and responsibility.20
There isn't such thing as too long. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. I don't care that he hasn't proposed, I know it will happen one day when he is ready and when we can actually afford it.10
@Travis_Skyles hurry up!! Jk
I'd say whenever you're ready. Preferably when in a stable situation (ie no $ worries, stable living situation and willingness to endure wedding planning and costs).10
If my boyfriend asked me in 2 years, and things would still be going as good as they are, I would say yes.20
7+ years is a really long time to wait.
Depending on where you are in life 2yrs? Should have a solid idea by then.10
Longer than 1-2 years in my opinion. Unless you’re both really young then longer than that makes sense. I don’t see the point in being with someone if you’re not at least talking about or working towards marriage early on.10
Lol I wouldn’t marry a woman. Your all dangerous and shouldn’t be trusted. That’s not to say all women are untrustworthy just that if they want all women can stab you in the back and you literally can’t do shit.10
2 years tou putting high risk investment you getting older and he may never proposed he already had you for that long and get tired if he wanted he would have done it already.20
Most Helpful Opinions
At my age, I expect to give it a single year pretty much exactly and then press the issue. I I were ten years younger, that time would go up dramatically. I stayed with a girl for 7 years because there was no rush to be serious. As soon as I did get serious, it lead to a break up before anyone could even propose. So it really depends on your situation. I would simply want to check if the other person still wants to. get there eventually, but I don't think putting a definitive cap on it is automatically the right choice.
At some point in life, you will hit a moment where you don't have time to date another 7 more years to finally get married and start a family. You're gonna have to settle at some point in life otherwise, it will likely never happen for you. Your chances of getting married doesn't increase as you get older.
@markayd not everyone wants to get married. My parents got divorced in their 50s. Waste of time to ever be married for them.
marriage is what you make of it. Marrying the wrong person is an option. Divorce is also an option. You chose to get divorced rather than to work on things. But the reality of dying alone is very difficult. A lot of the elderly spend the last years of hteir lives feeling very lonely, abandoned, and neglected. Kids often move away, relocate and dont bother to check up on their parents. Loneliness is a very common problem amongst the elderly.