Would you change your last name to your husband's after marriage?

[Itsmeirem]

Would you change your last name to your husband's or keep yours after marriage?

[godfatherfan]

For most things, I am very forward leaning. Don't keep the old stadium, build a new one. Whatever it may be. But there are some things I am very much old fashioned about. I would be unbelievably hurt if my new wife did not take my name. It has always been that way, and I would expect that. Honestly, in certain situations, it would be a deal breaker for me. Here is the rundown:

1) Has she been married before? If yes, did she change her name then? If yes, then 100% she needs to take my name. If she says no, then I probably end things. If she did it then, you can't try and say "oh, but it means so much to me to keep my name".

2) If she has never been married, then I would still be hurt, but at least I can understand her keeping her name. Though honestly, I don't see myself at 56, marrying anyone who hasn't been married, or at least in a long term relationship (s) 15+ year min.

3) hyphen is ok, as long as my name is on the end.

[Jersey2]

My wife took my name. She has had my last name now longer than her maiden name. We are one family. It is easier and better this way. The presidence has been set for many, many, many of years. Women take the man’s name. Now men can trace their family back through time with DNA as the male dna can be traced.

Female dna can only give the broad route her ancestors took out of Africa. This is fortunate with male dna and having the last name intact over many generations makes for great family research. My dna and name can be traced back to the year 380 A. D.

[Potteplante]

Didn't in my first marriage, but now he didn't really have a name for me to change too - marriage doesn't make me into a son of his father.

The marriage that never happened: I was planning on keeping mine and adding his, it isn't the norm where in from - but I liked the idea of having a family name. ☺️

[Anonymous]

I'm engaged and I will change my name after the wedding. It's a gesture of love and commitment. We are forming a new family and a family should have one name. And it's more practical for many reasons for both of us and our children to share the same last name.

[chocolatetwopointo]

why doesn't he take urs?

[Apple1996]

There are 0 reasons of why it's practical to share a name with your kids and husband lol I've been married 9 years with 5 kids and kept my name. It's never caused a single issue

[Peridot25]

@chocolatetwopointo @Apple1996 Funny you two want people to respect your decision but you can’t respect someone else’s.

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 it's fine if she wants to change her name. I'm just pointing out there is no benefits for a family all having the same name

[Peridot25]

@Apple1996 There’s a lot of things in this world that has no benefit. Yet, they still happen 🤷‍♀️

[Jersey2]

@anon Exactly

[HawkPerception]

I know it's old fashioned, but I honestly prefer my partner takes my name. I'd feel kind of rejected and not accepted if she didn't. I like my name and it sounds decent. The girls I've dated in my life all told me they would like to take my name as well if we got married.

[AviatorTom]

I've been married twice. In my first marriage from several years ago, my wife changed her last name to mine. When she remarried after our divorce (after 20 years of marriage), she took her new husband's last name.

When I remarried, my new wife kept her last name; most people know her by that and she didn't want to change it... fine with me. It's funny sometimes when I get called Mr <wife's last name>.

[electromagnetic]

In my culture, we don’t take our husbands last name. We have clans and your last name is usually your ancestral clan name so men carry it on with their offspring’s. Women don’t take their husbands last name as a reminder of the clan but also to sympathize that she doesn’t belong to her husband but rather the clan she’s in.

I hope this make sense.
like for me, although I’m married, I still kept my name.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Says you’re from Canada?

So what is your culture then?

[Sunnysunny123]

Yes, i think as a family we should have the same last name although he said he doesn't mind switching to mine or having them combined i just like his last name more and since we are from different countries we have very different last names that just don't go together 😄

[Saramad_Hill]

Literally could not care less. My last name came from my dad and his came from his step dad. If I am incredibly fortunate enough to find someone I want to marry, we'd discuss it then. We'd either change names (change her last name or mine) or change nothing at all. I'd want whatever my wife wants because in the end I'd still be winning for finding a lifelong partner. I am very against traditional norms but not to the point I'd totally shut them down if that's what my future partner enjoys.

[ManInChains]

How is it considered winning for finding a life partner? I'm genuinely interested to know how that is true.

[Saramad_Hill]

Well, it's more impressive to learn self-love, of course. And finding a partner isn't 'required' to live a fulfilling life. I do personally see it as an enhancement, though. It's really difficult to cuddle yourself, and sometimes you may want to see someone else smile as a result of your actions.

You can be entirely self sufficient and never marry, that's your prerogative. But there's nothing wrong with finding someone to share joy in your triumphs and comfort you in your failures-- while in turn helping them back. Cooperation can achieve more than going at everything solo. And call it vanity, but I'd want someone to miss me when I eventually die. We don't live in a vacuum state, at least not socially.

[ManInChains]

When have women ever smiled as a result of a man's actions?

What woman these days share joy in a man's achievements? When they're constantly told men are oppressors and should be empowering women instead of themselves? Also women don't comfort men in his failures. When they do the next thing she does is seek a new man to cheat on you with.

Women won't miss you when you're gone she'll just move on to the next guy and you'll be forgotten.

[ManInChains]

Men are only loved for what he provides men are never loved unconditionally. That is a FACT

[ManInChains]

The sooner you learn that, the better

[Saramad_Hill]

This will likely be my last reply since I don't think we'll agree on this. No offense, of course.

But I feel that you have this preconceived notion that all women are cheating harlots, deep down. Yes, there are misandrists out there who see men as a plaything to use and discard. There's also men like that, too. At the end of the day we are all human and we are capable of both good and evil under certain circumstances.

I have the feeling you've been burned before, or maybe you've fallen too deep into the red/black pill rabbit hole. That's fine if that's what you feel, as long as you're not out and about trying to hurt others you can say whatever you feel.

Women are not a blanket hivemind that want to latch onto men like parasites, I cannot stand blanket generalizations about an entire gender. Just like I'll disagree with someone who thinks all men are evil, sexual abusers. You have to judge each person you come across for the things they say and the actions they take. I will never just blindly love someone who seems ready to dip at the first sign of trouble.

Ultimately, I think it's still really hard to find someone compatible with you, but not impossible. I think the sooner you judge people based off their actions rather than their gender or sex, the happier you'll be. Make no mistake, there's plenty of immature people out there who buy into the "I'm oppressed" crap, and I could misconstrue your argument above as 'being oppressed by women.'

Either way, I'm done replying to this. You're welcome to send a last comment or whatever, or simply drop it. Have a good day and I hope you are able to eek out a life you enjoy living without damaging others somehow. That's all that matters in the end.

[Puppystarfish23]

Yes and I did. I didn't really like my last name and grew up with embarrassing nicknames because of it. I think my new name sounds a lot more posh

[NathanDavis]

either way, is not a big deal to me... the one that sounds better

or better yet... the one that requires less paperwork, lmao

[Simslover92]

I certainly would change my last name to my husband's. I'm very traditional.

[Apple1996]

Nah I kept my name. At first I was gonna change it after getting married but then I decided it wasn't a good idea since that is my identity

[Peridot25]

How would changing your last name make you lose your identity? You’re still you no matter what. I’ve seen a lot of women say that but I just never really understood what they meant.

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 my name is tied to who I am as a person and my family. I'm the last person in my family besides my dad and grandpa carrying the family name.
I'm not my husband's blood family so it seems weird to take his name when that's not even who I am/my family history

[Peridot25]

Who are you as a person?

[Peridot25]

And, to be fair, we change everyday. We all had a history at one point. For example, you were single and now married with kids.

[Peridot25]

You’re a wife and a mother. So, in a way, your identity changed.

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 sure but my past made me who I am. I don't really let being a mom and wife define me. I'm still a person beyond those things

[Peridot25]

And same with your husband, right?

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 ofc he's still a person beyond me as well but he obviously kept his name lol

[Peridot25]

Would he still be a person if he changed his name to yours?

[Peridot25]

Say he did change his last name to yours, would that mean he lost his identity? Would his family history mean nothing?

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 he would be giving up his identity for mine

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 to everyone seeing his name yes it would mean nothing

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 my husband only goes by his last name so literally If he changed it everyone in his life would be crazy confused

[Peridot25]

Would you be upset if your children didn’t keep their last names if they decide to get married one day?

[Peridot25]

Also, didn’t he already give up his identity once he got married and became a father? You lose your identity everyday, if you think about it.

[Apple1996]

@Peridot25 I don't care what my kids choose to do with their names

[Nikki1989]

I never did. We just didn't see any benefit in doing it.

[GOLDFISH_smile]

I kept mine bc I like it & is how I got my nickname/name, & he changed his bc he doesn't want associated with certain people of his last name.

[Crimsyjo]

It's not unacceptable but for me personally it's one of the purposes of marriage. To show you are one. Family. Joined. His.

[ManInChains]

That's exactly what feminism is trying to destroy. The family through abortion. They don't want anything to be considered "his"

[Crimsyjo]

@ManInChains oh well I'm not a feminist then. Or maybe it's just got twisted. Cos I actually want to take care of my man. I like to love and nurture and have him mean everything to me. Maybe that's a biological femine drive? What i don't agree with is being considered less than man or given rules that allow him freedom but not me the same freedom. I'm more for equality but also accepting our male and female qualities that fit to make a whole.
And with that... no.. abortion would never be necessary.

[Drumlin2001]

My fiancé dosent want to give up her family name. We're supposed to be having a hyphenated family name once we get married, if we get married

[luvstoned4him]

Change to my husband's unless he has one of those outrageous surnames that will cause social suicide

[DrPepper12]

Women should keep their name.
Silliness to change it as long as they both agree on a last name for kids. His, hers, hyphenated, blended, whatever.

[BCRanger10]

My wife changed her name to mine. The wife ought to.

[StrongMama]

I changed my last name in my first marriage and he cheated on me when i was pregnant. My new boyfriend wants to take my last name. It is more logic

[Billlewis]

I agree with you wholeheartedly;)

[Juxtapose]

If I'm with some femboy who has that much "top energy" then maybe haha 😂

[DextroShade]

If woman wouldn't do this it is a MASSIVE red flag!

[ManInChains]

Didn't Hillary Clinton want to reverse it and make it so that everyone went by their mother's maiden name? Pretty sure that was a thing... I wonder if Harris would do it

[Matt_M]

How so?

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M it means she is likely a feminist, has feminist tendencies, or had issues with submission making her utterly unsuitable for marriage.

[Matt_M]

I have a problem with submission too. I want a partner, not a slave. But I suppose that a control freak Bible-thumper may feel differently.

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M that sounds nice in theory but someone has to be the final decision maker. No country has two presidents, and no company has two CEOs. My wife is not my slave, and I am not religious; if she doesn't like my leadership she is free to leave.

[Matt_M]

Well I don't like countries and I don't like corporations, so I'm not about to emulate them in my romantic relationships. But you can do what you like and, if your wife is willing to put with you, then I suppose that's her prerogative.

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M you are a weak, low-T soyboy

[Matt_M]

As a general rule, I don't really care what yanks think. They're mostly retards anyway and it's just a matter of time before their shithole country eats itself alive.

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M says the idiot living in a country that is one generation away from living under Sharia law 🤣🤣🤣

[Matt_M]

Well hopefully it doesn't come to that. I'd much prefer the whole thing to just crash and burn completely -- along with every other nation on the planet.

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M why? So there can be global anarchy or communism?

[Matt_M]

Yeah, pretty much. Bring on the anarchy, man! I never liked civilization all that much anyway.

[DextroShade]

@Matt_M you do realize that weak, useless soyboys like yourself would be the first to die, right?

[Matt_M]

Oh well, I'm willing to risk it. The lack of soy milk could be a challenge, but we all have to make sacrifices.

[WhiteBoyChill]

Take my balls, take my name lol.

Nah jk.

I’d like to believe my wife would because its the more traditional thing to do.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If she's not willing to take my last name then she can't be my wife.

[DrPepper12]

Your loss

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

@DrPepper12 nope

[Anonymous]

Well if she didn't I wouldn't marry her. She's an iceberg.

[Mati91]

I did don’t regret it.

[jazzy34]

Yes. That’s never been an issue for me. 😊

[Miristheiss]

?

Wow, modern women.

[Nifrayu]

I'm going to take my wife's name.

[LadyBecks]

I did change mine

[paledreams]

Most chicks usually do ♀️👠

[LazerBean]

I did, so yeah

[Ms_Facesitter]

I would.

[red-lipstick-girl]

Yes💋❤️

[Iron_Man]

They should

[chocolatetwopointo]

nah i dont think so

[Jmmmfi4]

SHE BETTER