A TODDLER'S View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

bannacookies

I'm sure we're all a bit bored currently, so I thought to tell you an entertaining story:

Cookie was about 3 or 4 years old when she remembers sitting in her room, wondering how babies came about.

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

Cookie's parents have always been pretty...we'll say prudent, and never told her much. At that age, all Cookie knew is that babies come about once a man and a woman were married, and that God created babies.

So, this is what Cookie figured was the most logical thing that could happen for a baby to be made:

The couple gets married.

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

They decide when they want to have a kid, and the wife would go outside and yell, "God! I want to have a baby!"

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

She would then open her mouth, and a capsule that was dropped from heaven went into her mouth.

She swallows it; the baby grows in her stomach.

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

Once the baby was ready to come out, the baby would come out of her butt, naturally, because, um...where else would it fit out of?

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

The baby came out wearing clothes, of course. It's a sin to be naked, ever. So they must be wearing nice clothes for their first day in the world.

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

So, that's that.

And when Cookie did find out how babies were made many years later....Cookie was surprised.

A TODDLERS View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie

THE END

A TODDLER'S View on HOW BABIES ARE MADE! #StoriesFromCookie
15 Opinion