Why is arrogance seen as an attractive quality by some people?

With some I include myself ๐Ÿ˜‚. I don't know why I think it's kinda attractive (It's a negative thing after all).

Updates:
GUYS I DID NOT ADD THAT PICTURE SO STOP ASKING ME ABOUT IT, AN GAG ADMIN ADDED IT. IT AINยดT EVEN MY TYPE, AND YES ITยดS CAMERON DALLAS.
Thanks for the useful answers though, and no I doยดt confuse confidence with arrogance. I know the differences.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • At least those people have self belief, even if it is exaggerated or a front. They don't allow people to put them down and they don't shy away from saying what they're good at. In all honesty, it is those who are most intimidated by arrogance who tend to hate it.

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    • You get me? It's like they're immune for the bad opinions of others, and it makes them appear superior.

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    • Yep, you're right. A lot of people really do wish that they could be that way because it is definitely better than being excessively emotionally vulnerable.

      I don't tend to go into arrogance too often, unless I'm playing a caricature of myself, but I do have a very strong sense of inner peace and that just isn't affected by other peoples' bullshit. Mainly because it isn't built on other peoples' bullshit.

    • I think there are enough people who secretly look up to them indeed, but since their words affects them, they tend to hate arrogance in people because they're incapable of viewing the world they view it. It's like self-defense.

      I'm completely the opposite of arrogance myself, and I envy them sometimes ๐Ÿ˜‚.

Most Helpful Girl

  • My boyfriend is an ignorant asshole and gives no fucks about anyone's feelings except mine of course lol. I like how he treats me like a queen and the rest of the world like they are beneath us. Its like us against the world type of thing. I know it sounds messed up but I guess you have to be in a dominant submissive kind of relationship to find flatter in it. I am submissive so I like to please and cater to my man while he makes sure the world never gets in my way or in between the love we have for each other. I am the calm, kind, sweet one while he is the one who protects. I am not even explaining it in a way that is understood, its quite hard to. Dont get me wrong we aren't bad people lol but I guess its more of a pleasurable thing for us. People see him as an asshole and no one to step to, and I see him as my man, my teddy bear, my protector. No shame at all.

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What Guys Said 115

  • I'm a confident person and at the same have the capability to give replies to "sharp - witty" comments in an even sharper - wittier way, being called a smooth operator when talking to girls or "savage" when turning around mean malicious comments/remarks.
    I am able to flirt with girls openly with an attitude of "I know you like me, stop pretending" but without actually saying it, just planting the idea in her head that I can tell she likes and making her wheels turn.
    Plus in the end I do not really care about the mean idiots that hate me, so I couldn't care less about what they think about this.

    All these things might make me look arrogant to outside people, but in the end if the girl accepts and appreciates my smart flirting and comments and my comebacks, then what do I care.

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  • Chasing that carrot, the arrogant person puts themselves above you and you try to jump and reach them.

    Other that that, people mistake confidence for arrogance. Arrogant people put people around them down, while confident people inspire confidence.

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  • Two reasons:

    The arrogance is mistaken as confidence

    Submissive people presume an arrogant person to be their dominant counterpart

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    • ... as in a submissive person finds dominant people attractive, and the arrogant person is presumed to be dominant

    • To be fair, often times arrogance and confidence go hand in hand. That's why so many winning professional athletes tend to be arrogant. When you're beating EVERYONE why wouldn't you think you are the shit, unless you actively tried to maintain humility. I know that's how I and other people feel, when you go on a strong win streak. You feel like the fuckin King lol

    • I look at it kind of like this:

      Confidence: Self-assured in oneself and ones ability

      Arrogant: Self-assured in oneself, ones ability and inflated sense of self importance.

      Like that self-assured feeling may or may not actually be based on anything. You just have that belief. But with arrogance you also have an inflated sense of self. So you can be a humble/confident person, even when you lose just like you can be an arrogant/confident person in the same circumstances. But when you lose it's harder to be arrogant and you get humbled.

  • Arrogance gets interpreted as confidence. Confidence is attractive. Even a lot of dudes like confident women, at least I do. It can get annoying when you're dating a girl and she's always/constantly doubting herself when it's clear she is fine/has potential (and I don't mean sometimes because everyone gets down on themselves sometimes, I'm talking frequently).

    As for dudes, I think a lot of girls see guys who are full of themselves and are attracted because they are confident and haters/bad things aren't going to phase them/their confidence.

    However, I don't think arrogance is truly confidence. To me, people who arrogant usually somewhat confident but have some insecurities and they come off so strong to try and hide them. A truly confident person would be honest with themselves to overcome it, instead of overlooking/ trying to hide truth.

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  • it's because arrogance is misinterpreted as , confidence. guiltlessness, shamelessness and fearlessness... yet if you have all three same traits you can recognize it... and you will also recognize that you want someone who is what you want to become, balanced.. in guiltlessness, fearness, shamelessness, and with these three balanced you becoming loving, both self loving and people/outer-loving

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  • I didn't know arrogance was ever considered an attractive trait. In one sense I could see it if it's in the sense of how certain arrogant people behave. Many are confident in their decisions even if they're wrong. Many aren't willing to put up with people who try to put them down (at least in their eyes, though many times it's people trying to correct them). I'm personally not a fan of arrogance, and I'm not sure that I could really understand why it, in and of itself would be seen as attractive. Even so, It's interesting to hear that there are those who do find it attractive.

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  • Christ. I have never seen a more punchable face in my life. The fuck is up with that kid's mouth?

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  • Some people mistake it for confidence.

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  • Well arrogant people feel too much superiority as for people around them, which isn't right for someone who is confident. The thing that attract you maybe on them is the fact that they reject mostly everyone like a sign of strong personality which is not right at all. Plus bonding to this kind of people might create internal issues, sometimes serious, which you can't see as a distant admirer.

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    • That's true, they're very picky and won't befriend anyone no matter how nice one is. They'll befriend the one they want and who is at least on the same level as well. Looking down on other people is indeed common and arrogant people might be toxic. Yet I can't help myself. I'm like as long they see me as one of them then it's fine. (I have had no problems with that so far, cuz I'm from such a place)

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  • Even if you are a genius, there is no call for arrogance. There is always a lesson to be learnt, and humility is always the best way to learn it. You rarely, if ever find a really clever, and learned person who is arrogant, and if you did, then you have to wonder what their knowledge lacks. Arrogance should never be mistaken for confidence.

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  • Because the arrogant person is differentiating between people, so it feels good for your ego to have him pick you? Arrogance is easy conflated with self confidence and self assurredness. The latter probably comes from a kind of inner stillness and a deep place, whereas the former is probably something one is more noisily and out of fear grasping for.

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  • By my observation, this is something fairly common in younger women and teenage girls that kind of dissipates as they get older. The guys who used to get all the attention from girls when they were in high school, if they act the same when they are 30, start getting eyerolls instead.

    The reason for the change could be due to any number of things or a combination of them. Arrogant guys tend to be domineering, which many younger women seem to prefer. Arrogance can also look a lot like very high levels of confidence, and our reptilian brains sometimes can't tell the difference, even if our mammalian brains can, so to speak. There's an important distinction, though:

    Arrogance is born of the need to seem better than everyone else, whereas confidence is born out of being ok with not being better than everyone else. Arrogance is a sign of insecurity. A person needs to feel better than others because they don't feel that way. If you truly are ok with who you are, you don't feel a need to flaunt anything.

    I think that, as women age and have experiences with arrogant guys that don't go so well, they begin to gravitate more towards genuine confidence. But that's just my hypothesis.

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  • People are attracted to confidence and high social status. Arrogance displays both, at least superficially.

    Additionally the smug/cockiness of arrogance displays "I don't need to appeal to you/to anyone". This action implies that person is above you in the social hierachy. You only need to appeal to those that you perceive as above yourself.

    The problem with arrogance is that it can often be fake, staged or used by narcissist. That's the tricky part to differentiate as an outsider.

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  • I have to say. The only time when I've seen Arrogance as a good quality. Is when It comes to Leadership. Making decissions that affect life or death of people. And the arrogant leader Had Better Know His or Her Shi* Inside out fowards and backwards. plus know now to control pekple. otherwise they'll be holding the bag and responsibility for the deaths or injuries of all people involved. All other time. arrogance is the worst quality to have

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  • I know that when I'm fantasizing, it can be a turn-on to imagine being with a girl who's a selfish jackass/straight-up terrible person. Because scary/bad scenarios can feel exciting.

    Doesn't mean I'd ever want it to happen in real life, of course. I always try to draw clear lines between the two.

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    • wow you think like a woman lol

    • @animus1988 I actually got in the habit (a long time back) of mulling over the genderswapped versions of smut scenarios I was reading. Partly to help me see things more clearly? But yeah, it's not actually that hard to get into.

  • What I've read and listened too in the past I say it's a psychological response. As humans are super complex we have a desire to attain things we cannot have. With that arrogance actually makes us feel another un-obtainable. This in turn causes us to make up excuses to ignore the arrogance (or rude behaviour) to inturn obtain what we don't have. This is done and shown in higher class clothing stores with sales clerks methods of sales. Some places may come across as snobby or arrogant to make the sale. And that is why they do it. or maybe why you find it attractive when others in a social scenario portray it towards you. Obtain the un-obtainable. ๐Ÿ˜Š

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  • Arrogance is a virtue I'm very proud to have.
    Well.. Sometimes, anyway. It has its place =]

    Some people are attracted to cockiness and arrogance. Maybe it's because it shows that a person is capable of being a decision maker. Someone who doesn't have the self confidence to be able to make a decision by themselves is usually pretty unattractive.

    But it could also be a sign that the person is incredibly full of shit and/or very stupid. So I guess it's a case-by-case thing where it could be attractive or unattractive, ya?

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  • Well people like confidence right? Arrogance is a form of confidence I suppose just more smug.

    I can't say why some people like it, but everyone has their preferences I suppose.

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  • A woman in my view, like confidence in their guy, arrogance comes across as confident.

    Arrogance is tolerated, provided that he isn't mentally abusing the woman, or he is so arrogant that his confidence blinds him when he is wrong and stupid when he thinks he's right.

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    • I think there are several forms of arrogance,, abusive and cockiness,, my impression is you go for cockiness.

  • What if one day that person uses his arrogance on you? Ever thought of it? Will they still be attractiveness

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  • Ya know I don't get it. What are people even arrogant about? Like... if someone is acting like they are the shit I just don't see how most people are actually worthy of their arrogance. Most people I think are just full of fluff.

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  • Because it's an Alpha Male quality. Not arrogance specifically, but the self-assured aspect of arrogance. Arrogance just comes also with the inflated sense of self importance, while confidence is just the self-assured belief in oneself and ones abilities. Plus arrogant guys tend to also push emotional buttons so you feel something when they're around you. Mind you the self-assured feeling doesn't actually have to be based on anything. He just has to have it.

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  • Arrogance is closely related to confidence/self assuredness, which are considered positive traits. So some will be attracted towards arrogance due to the similarities they share.

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  • Sure... cause arrogance can thread a fine line of snarky and witty... and people most often think with their Genitals, girls included...

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  • Arrogance is a front for all the insecurities and fear the little boy has in his heart. A man with a black belt in martial arts is taught to be humble with quiet confidence.
    Why girls are attractted to arrogant guys is because of there protective motherly instincts to nuture the little boy within the tough guy persona.
    Women fall for the bad boy because they think they can save them and change them with their love, its like adopting a cute little abandoned puppy.

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    • I completely agree with the quiet confidence being far more attractive than arrogance statement!!

  • there can be many different reasons, sometimes the people who like arrogance might lack the self esteem and its nice to be with someone who doesn't. sometimes people like arrogance because it means that they won't have to put much effort in to keeping the other happy. most often arrogant people put more effort into looking presentable which makes them more attractive by looks. as I said a lot of reasons

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  • People who haven't met many decent people confuse it with confidence.

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  • Well, I think people like arrogant people because when people show their arrogance, they prove that they are self-confident. For some people that self confidence is enough to make them attracted to that person and also MOSTLY the arrogant people are beautiful/handsome so definitely other people will be attracted to them. :)

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  • it's the pretense that they are of higher value than you, and that makes others want to associate with them since they feel it will raise their social worth. The problem is that it's attractive primarily to those with insecurities, since the thought of change is more important than the logical analysis that would conclude this behavior as fictitious and often baseless.

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  • Because im fucking awesome.

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What Girls Said 72

  • I think because arrogance displays shamelessness in a bad light. Shamelessness captivates in an area where no one takes risks of being open to judgment. Look at how people often called "arrogant;" most of the time, they do not care about what others would think about them.

    Confidence, meanwhile, is what I'd call as the positive shamelessness.

    People interchange confidence and arrogance, which shouldn't be the case because confidence uplifts and motivates others while arrogance does the opposite.

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    • The association with confidence might be the cause. Thing is I usually find the negative (as long it's not towards me) more attractive than the positive (confidence).

  • i think it's because humans usually like confident people, and arrogance is a common treat shared by confident people (and/or) people who know they look good

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  • I wouldn't say arrogance itself is really the attractive trait rather than the attitude that comes with it. I personally hate super cocky and arrogant guys because it just makes it seem like they are so full of themselves. But in moderation, it gives off the vibe that the person is really conferrable and confident in himself which is a super attractive quality for a guy to have. It's kinda like a bad boy trait, and I am kinda attracted to bad boys, and I'm sure there are some girls out there that can agree. Also, it depends are what they are being arrogant about. If it's just the same stuff over and over again or just bragging about how rich and attractive he is, that stuff gets boring over time. Another point to consider is "who are they being arrogant for?". To impress females? or because it's part of their personalities? Like I said arrogance in moderation isn't always a bad thing. I don't want a guy who is super arrogant all the time but not a guy who has nothing good to say about himself and is super insecure. I am already insecure and if he's more insecure than me, we are going to have issues. Not trying to confuse confidence with arrogance, but they are related, and arrogance from first glance (in my opinion) always portrays confidence. If we really wanna go far into this conversation, we can look at the evolutionary perspectives. In the natural world, we can see that particularly male animals are loud, large, and colourful creatures. Why? To attract their mate of course. Male peacocks spread their colourful feathers and walk around. Which is basically the same as telling everyone how great you are and acting like the best guy out there. another thing is, male animals fight with other male animals of their species, and they do it the the females sometimes. So again, yes if you look at some of the points I have stated, arrogance is attractive, but only to a certain degree. And it depends on the movie behind the behaviour.

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    • Plus, it really depends what someone considers to be arrogant or not. Some people do not find arrogance attractive at all, so there are many factors to consider, such as who you are dealing with because everyone thinks differently

  • Every positive attribute can be phrased in a negative way and vise-versa. Arrogance could also been seen as confidence. Putting effort into ones appearance can be seen as a sign of success, responsibility, a good sense of style, even just good hygiene; it can also be seen as being full of ones self, vain, vapid, or shallow. Being slow to show emotions can be seen as emotional maturity and strength or being distant and cold. Almost every trait has a bad and good interpretation, it's up to the individual to figure out what balance on the spectrum of each is most attractive.

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  • The term 'opposite attracts' never fails to lose its irony on some people. Arrogance is viewed negatively with cause as words such as conceited, self involved, cocky, overbearing and so forth is associated with the meaning. A person who is totally different may find that odd and question, 'How can one person be so vain?' It may be a front for some people, a way to fit with the stereotypes or simply because you can't help but be you. Females especially find it attractive when a guy is self assured and efficient in stuttering and impossible situations, when his shoulders lift or the exaggerated pep in his step that you just can't miss. Its human nature to like what you see there.

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  • Because there are a lot of timid, self-esteemless people out there I assume. So someone being so confident that they come across arrogant can seem almost exotic to some.

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  • I can appreciate a competent person who is confident in their proven abilities. I think that arrogance gets confused w/ confidence a lot, though. Arrogance is childish, self destructive, and it's obnoxious in my opinion. Any guy who approaches me and openly suggests that I owe him attention/sex/adoration is automatically written off. If a guy walks up to me and talks to me like we're both equally flawed and respectable human beings, he'll have my respect at the very least.

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  • Many inexperienced/immature (any age) people mistake arrogance for confidence. I'd say most people learn to realize the difference eventually.

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  • It depends if they have a reason to be.
    I give credits, if someone is really smart or talented well I 'll give him that, he earned it.
    So for those people you wanna get their attention I think. Makes you feel more worthy if someone with his value has a soft spot for you. The fact that he doesn't give 2 fucks for others but cares about you makes you feel special. So it s like a challenge where a person eleviates your self worth where it should be you doing it yourself.
    So people who actually like arrogant people have a lower self esteem and consider said person of a higher league and out of his reach.

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  • There's a fine line between arrogance and confidence. I sometimes find myself attracted to arrogant me as well, lord knows why. Maybe it's just the fact that they seem to not care what other people think of them.

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    • Yeah, I've noticed that they don't give a single fuck about people. It makes them appear superior

  • Weird. I always found arrogance to be *unattractive*. I don't care what the guy looks like, I wouldn't give him more than a minute of my time.

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  • People confuse arrogance with confidence.

    Generally, as we get older we learn to recognize the difference.

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  • I think it's more of the confidence that they are attracted to that's attached to it. Unfortunately they go hand in hand.

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  • I think confidence is very sexy, and there's a very close line between the two of them, so sometimes I may be attracted to an arrogant guy because I like his confidence, but after a while it's easy to tell they're not for me

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  • Some people consider me arrogant which is unusual in a woman. I am not arrogant just very confident and self-assured. I've been told all my life this was a bad quality by everyone I have ever worked for. Until now. My confidence draws people to me and my positivity inspires people. This is considered a masculine trait, which I am happy to portray as a woman. The days of an insecure woman needs to go.

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  • Maybe it tells you that they probably aren't insecure.

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  • I have no idea. I absolutely can't stand arrogance. It's a huge turn-off for me. I do like it when a guy is confident with who he is etc or just accepting, but arrogance is a no.
    My sister also likes arrogance in guys and I don't get it. The chances of being attracted to a fuckboy will rise to the roof with this attraction.

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  • what is the name of the guy on the picture?

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  • sometimes it's mistaken for confidence

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  • Arrogance is not attractive to me at all... And I notice this a lot that people flock to arrogant people more these days.

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  • Probably with the same reason girls like bad boys.

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    • I never liked 'bad' boys, they make me become distant for some reason. I've had crushes on snobs (They're pretty arrogant).

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  • you're confusing the biological attractive trait of confidence with arrogance. it's a fine line. but if you're smart, you can see the difference between arrogance and true confidence.

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  • not by me..

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  • I hate arrogant people. If a precious man-boy is super arrogant is a turn off. I wouldn't consider him that precious anymore, I will see something a little bit off in his mind. I like and enjoy the company of people that is open and clear, also positive. I think being an arrogant closes all those options. We have an arrogant for president, see how that looks? Is aweful.

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  • lol who told you it was attractive it is not

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  • Lack of "Confidence in Oneself" makes him/her believe in the "Arrogance of the Other". ๐Ÿ’•

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  • Because they like that attitude

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  • Confidence is always sexy af but when it gets to the conceited territory that's where it becomes a huuuge turn off

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  • i agree with what some of the others have said about there being a fine line between confidence and arrogance

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  • I make a distinction between confidence and arrogance and never find arrogance attractive.

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