I've dropped out of university now what?

[artsy_dragon]

I've dropped out of university in my 2nd year. So now I have to pay back 50% of my loan. I left on the grounds of poor mental health, so I can maybe get help. I was forced into doing a degree that I was not passionate about.

I am now stuck with a massive student debt. My parents will not be happy and honestly they can go and fuck themselves. I am adviced not to leave the country and help in Ukraine as I am not mentally stable. Work wants me to rest and I've taken out all my holiday until the end of January as my sick pay has now ran out.

So I don't know where this leaves me now. I couldn't even call my phone company today for my overdue phone bill which I can't pay, which they will now cut me off. So basically I've got until February to figure something out or I am fucked.

I'm not asking for money. I'm asking for help on what to do now. I have to go back to work in February or I have to hand in my notice. So I'll have to work 2 weeks, even if I can't work I have to go in and to get a reference. And then figure out what to do. I won't be entitled to any benefits as my boyfriend earns to much money.

I can't get anymore loans. Nor ask anyone for money. I've sold everything I own like alomost all of my clothes, jewellery, my laptop etc. And cut down on everything I don't need. Any ideas please?

[Rosexøxø]

I just read your (most recent?) my take. I think it’s possible you may have forgotten that you typed it up. 🤷‍♀️👀👍

“Half drunk” also means you were being ‘double the honest.’

Without mention of drunk, and before I considered this small detail you mentioned only towards the end of the article, I knew and sensed you typing the my take was something you truly felt. Even if unsure, your subconscious and inner being was focusing on this, and it’s a direction you have your sights on.

I think it WOULD be good because it will help you not be too much of: internally perspective/ reflective, and instead, help you to focus on the outside world a bit more.

Nothing wrong with self care, love, and reflection. 👐 Being self aware. There just needs to be a balance. 🙏

I can say, that going to help in the war may not change your views about certain things, about yourself, but it will give you a new perspective on life and help you to grow, and grow more into the potential and ‘mature-version’ of yourself, that is waiting to be unlocked/achieved.

Despite my last claims, there really is CHANCE you would change your outlook on aspects of yourself. For

the better.

I think it would be super helpful and high time you engaged the world and get out of your emotions concerning self, family life, and etc. (We all can get caught up in minor things like/ similar to this- family and such).

You don’t have to revolve around them, or let them and those things live rent-free in your mind, 24/7.

This is your life- engage the ‘planet earth’ world, and the ‘societal’ world. Engage your world and live your life. Have fun. Be stimulated. Enjoy the thrill. Appreciate the sympathy and coming together, for causes and people, greater and more unfortunate than ourselves.

This war efforts outlook and decision is a true stepping stone, and if it weren’t for this, I would definitely say you have some level of interest and a passion/appreciation for the ‘arts.’ If you were to combine these two things, 🙏or let them unite inside you. You would be finding beauty among the despair, and helping envision and repair, what has been broken over there.

You may not see this but-

you really are a ‘people-person.’

You have social traits and characteristics that are appreciated by many, (including myself) and make it easier to understand, accomplish, achieve, and get things done.

I’m hopeful, confident, and excited for you, sis!

Wars aren’t “pretty,” but you can bring beauty, to the resolve and to the life of those who are trying to cope, and muster through it.

Even after the war, I think art will be wanting you to join its categorial team. 😁 Your pfp and banner, shows me you have an eye for it. A heart as well. 🤲

I believe you wanted the confirmation, and I’m giving it to you. I think we all know this is what you want to do. You told us this in your guessing and calculating.

You are already so precious and I’m grateful for a web user/ true individual such as yourself to have engaged with, but I do know taking these life paths, could only add more value to your life.

I know that’s a fact.

What I do *hope* is that it will also correspondingly add more appreciation, gratitude, sympathy, and happiness in your life.

You were smart to sell some things and buy yourself added time.

I know you can critically think to give yourself leverage, and even simultaneously, be doing it while helping others do the same/similar.

I personally am not familiar with how the war is run/organized over there, and I think for the most part, that they would provide food/aid resources and money is not of the essence over there. 🤷‍♀️ It’s not relevant anyways. They need generous alliances and donors to give them electricity/ lumber/ meats/ canned foods/ some additional artillery/ various equipment.

Maybe you can start a ‘GoFundMe’ on your socials and such? Maybe strike up a global one? (It would be crazy (awesome) if some donations came from Russian citizens as well). You could start the fun, exclaiming you need money to help travel to, and help with the Ukraine aid/ relief/ and recovery.

If financial matters are of a concern, do let me know, and I will try to make some suggestions.

Best to you sis! I believe in you! You have my support and best wishes for you, in your ventures and endeavors for all of 2023 😁. Oh and beyond! 😁👐

[Rosexøxø]

by the way I tried replying to your message but I can’t unless I am followed by you I believe? It’s something with your settings. Something was notified to me like

“Only allows messages from followings.”

But I had copied my answer and tried to paste it here for convenience. I lost it among other copy pasted context 😂😭

But I basically said it was alright and I don’t find you an offensive person at all because I can see you are someone who means well. That was my guess. No problems on my end. I think I even covered on how I liked your pfp and name. You are unique!

Which is certainly a real treat for many of us at GaG, certainly me, anyhow. 👐😊

[artsy_dragon]

Wow thank you so much! I will definitely take that into account. Take care yourself ❤️

[Anonymous]

sorry for your bad mental health. i've been there. it sucks.

as for life, if you're not going to college, then you need to get a job, which seems like you already have?

as for the debt, get a second job. maybe one of those ubereats food runners type of deals. and to double that, if your boyfriend wants to help, have him do the same thing if he doesn't mind giving you that money.

[SnowedIn]

Artsy, dear lady, it's been a rough few months for you, eh?

You're UK, right? My first thought is don't your local councils have advisors/counselors for situations like yours? They may not have money but they may have answers and/or guidance on where to go for answers and, more importantly, they are a caring human who will listen.

I've said this before, I'm concerned about your boyfriend. I know you love him and I respect that. But I'm really worried because what you write doesn't demonstrate him loving and caring for you. My concern is that his lack of care is holding you back and weighing you down.

I think you need to focus on these things in roughly this order:

• shelter
• food
• health
• keeping a job
• paying the bills to the point where they're manageable

As much as I think it would suck HUGELY, and you would have to swallow a giant amount of pride, I agree with @LazerBean and you should move in with your parents. Suck up their disapproval and all that. But you'd have shelter and probably food taken care of. That allows you to focus on health and having those first two needs taken care of will give you less stress and more sleep contributing to better health.

Then you focus on the job you have now. Give it your all. Here's why: you're already there and they already know you. Starting over is really, really hard. Go back to work and work as much and as hard as you can and when you're there be the best employee they have. Demonstrate to them that they're right to put faith in you and stick by you (not all employers will). Then take that income and start, piece by piece, to get the bills into place.

Finally, as you work through these, go talk to... whoever (I don't know who does it in the UK) and pursue the forgiveness or delay or some relief regarding dropping out of school. They'd do this in America and we're way worse about stuff like that than the UK. Just keep pushing the folks to understand your situation.

I know it's really easy for me to sit here and dispense advice. Not my intent to pretend that it's easy. But, you're smart (that's always been evident) and you care and you have an inner spark and an inner strength and I think you are able to work through this.

[artsy_dragon]

Tysm! I will look into that advice but I am not going back to my parents. My mother is toxic and I am nit going back there.

[SnowedIn]

Go you! I respect that. Maybe other family? Regardless, I'm cheering you on from across the pond and my door is always open.

[artsy_dragon]

I've got no other family and thanks! ❤️

[SnowedIn]

thank you for MHO

[Anonymous]

Do you need someone just to talk to? I can listen.

[Rosexøxø]

That’s certainly helpful of you 😊👍

[LazerBean]

Move back in with your parents and work as much as you can. Pick up odd jobs if necessary.

[artsy_dragon]

Tysm! I will look into that advice but I am not going back to my parents. My mother is toxic and I am nit going back there.

[Anonymous]

Get some kinda work to clear the debt
That's all I have to offer but as for what I don't know

[Bethany22]

Go to the food bank for food

[Anonymous]

You have to find your passion.

[Rosexøxø]

This is a good claim 👀👍