Do people get more assertive as they get older?

[Anonymous]

When I was 18 years old, I was the type of girl who was unsure of everything, apologized for everything that went wrong, said sorry too much even if it wasn't exactly my fault, accept an undercooked steak even if I ordered well done. I would obsess over what boys thought about me.

Now 10 years later that I am in my late 20s, everything is the opposite. I am not nearly as sensitive as I was back then. I rarely ever say sorry anymore unless I've done something terribly wrong. I will be mean to other people, if necessary to get things done. I don't even care about what men think of me anymore. I have no problem sending back 50 dishes if they don't fit my standards.

Am I the only one who got more assertive as we got older?

[WaterIsland]

I think that’s fully common. I’d be careful about being mean even if it leads to the results you want. There is a huge difference between being rude and firm. It’s uncalled for to be rude. Kindness and respect leads to much better results and outcomes in life than being rude.


As people get older tho, they realize that there is a balance in life. Not everything goes your way. Speaking up to defend yourself is a positive and healthy thing. Additionally when we’re younger it’s all about figuring out what that line is and how to handle different situations. It is a fine line between being firm and being rude. And it’s not a line that anyone wants to cross. But as you get older, you become more comfortable with yourself and the situations around you.

[LickwidSkie]

As you get older, you're getting grumpier, more tired, less tolerant, etc... It's a natural part of the aging process.