Is my psychologist’s approach normal, or is she lying to me?

[someone4242]

I need your opinion.

I've had 2 therapy sessions with a psychologist.

During the first session, I cried most of the time and couldn't explain my problems well, so I had written them down beforehand.

In the second session, the psychologist mostly talked. She said my low self-esteem is not caused by the traumas I wrote about, but by other factors. She also explained that our thoughts affect our emotions, and our emotions affect our body's reactions.

The session lasted about 45 minutes, and I paid the equivalent of around $35–40. I spent most of the session just listening. I left feeling like nothing had changed and that I hadn't gained anything specific.

After the session, I texted her saying I felt hopeless because I didn't notice any improvement. She replied that this session was mainly for psychoeducation and that I would notice a difference starting from the next session.

Is this a normal way for therapy to begin? Do many psychologists spend the first sessions mostly explaining concepts, or should I be concerned?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

It's very common for patients to assume they will quickly feel different, but therapy is really not medication, it doesn't do anything to the brain, only to the mind, hopefully, and it takes time.

It takes time especially when what you experience is intense, since you spent the first session crying, this has to be very intense.

I'd say it's normal for a psychologist to spend some time explaining what she does and what to expect from her, which usually challenges patients' assumptions about what therapy is. Because first time patients normally run preconceived ideas about what it is.

[genericname85]

You have unrealistic expectations when it comes to therapy. Imagine it a bit like physiotherapy. You're not just having one physiotherapeutic sitting to fix litterally all your issues right? It's a longer term treatment that doesn't necessarily have any immediate effects but that most definitely will successively improve things over the long run.

[genericname85]

I meant physical therapy. It's just called physiotherapy in my native language and I assumed that was an anglicism. apparently it's not.

[midnightmoon05]

Yes.
changes take time.
improvement? 😂 that mostly come from you.

What you need to learn is patience…

then think about your parents.
What is your relationship like between you and your mom/dad?
To find out if yiur therapist is good… is to know…. Slowly if he/she asks you about your parents relationship

[WhitneySnow]

This is normal based on my experience. But psychologists can’t prescribe medication, so you may need a psychiatrist in addition to or in place of her if your problems are partially treatable by medication.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to make your love life, self-esteem, and emotional world way less confusing and a lot more fun to navigate. So let’s dive in, cutie 😏

Yes, this is actually a normal start, especially for CBT-style therapy. Early sessions are often info-heavy: assessment, psychoeducation, explaining how thoughts → feelings → body reactions. That "nothing changed" feeling after 2 sessions is super common.

Red flag would be if many sessions pass and you still only get theory with no practical tools, exercises, or focus on your specific problems. For now, she doesn’t sound like she’s lying, just being structured and maybe a bit too academic.

Give it a few more sessions, watch for concrete strategies, and also trust your gut. Therapy is like dating: if after a while you feel unseen, you’re allowed to “break up” and find someone whose style fits you better 💋

[Staximus]

A psychologist is not a witch or a wizard who just magically fixes your problems overnight. You have unrealistic expectations and need to check back into reality. It’s going to take some time for them to figure you out. It’s going to take some time for you to fully process, comprehend, and accept what they are telling you. It’s going to take time for you to change your mindset, outlook, way of thinking, and also hire to react to situations.

[rojodefender]

It's hard to say without being there myself. I say either give her a shot, with caution, or switch to a different professional. Even if what she is doing would be helpful for some patients, it doesn't mean her approach is correct for you. Everyone is different.

[msc545]

You didn't pay her to lecture you. You paid her to listen to you. Find a different psychologist.

[Iron_Man]

They’re supposed to be honest if you feel like he’s lying get out of there

[In_Trance]

This is not the place to attempt engagement with leading questions

[MonsterEmperor]

The psychologist was a complete disappointment. If you want to tell me about your problem, I'll listen, but please try not to be upset.

[rojodefender]

What reason would they have to lie? Get a second medical opinion.

[Badtobad]

What does he say?

[genericname85]

How is he lying?

[Anonymous]

I suppose it's normal.