Can you get sued for leaving your girlfriend at the altar?

[Anonymous]

I will marry my girlfriend in August. However, I don't love her. I use to like her back when we were in high school and early college years, but she humiliated me in front of her friends. I always wanted to avenge myself because Hell knows no furry like a scorned man. She eventually accepted me and I proposed to her and we will get married soon. I was thinking of getting my revenge by leaving her at the altar. The only thing that has made me think twice about this plan is if I can get sued by her because she and her family are putting money into the wedding. I am only putting $3000 and I don't care loosing that money, but she and her parents are putting around $11000. Can she and her family sue me for the $11000?

[likesexontoast]

yes, you can definitely get sued. if they find out in any that this was your intention from the start, for ex by seing this question, finding out from your friends etc, you can get sued and will almost definitely lose. and have to pay for emotional/pshycological compensation ontop of that aswell. so yeah, its very risky from that point.

and that's without even mentioning the sheer pettiness, cruelty and heartlessness of what you are doing. theyre are parents whose children have been shot dead in absolutely unprovoked, unjust and sick racist murders. they managed to forgive their own childrens' killers. why? because they couldn't live the that sort of hate in their hearts. the said themselves that it was that sort of bitter and cruel hatred itself that led to the tragic death of their kids. if they lived with bitter hatred towards the attacker, then they would not be any better than the murderer himself. they knew they wouldn't be able to live on carrying that hate with them, even despite the law and justice getting revenge on the guy, because they knew theyd still be angry. and this is coming from the parents of the teenager..

my point? there are people in the world who have forgiven others for doing THE worst possible thing you could ever do to a parent/person in the entire world. I'm not saying you never had a right to be angry as I don't know your story, but perhaps you could maybe stop for a moment, step back and take a look at yourself and see what kind of person you have become. I mean compare whatever your situation is to those people. after you do that, I can guarantee you will not feel completely better because eventually either your conscience will catch up with you and you will feel horrible. or else, this evil hatred that you conjured up in yourself will not stop, and you will keep doing more and more horrible things like this. eventually, you too will be an unloved horrible bitter man, even more so than you seem now and will have led yourself into a f-ed up life of hatred, cruelty and loneliness. either way, you'll stil end up being the worse-off loser. try to find in yourself to understanding how wrong this is, both to yourself and the girl.

[Whitneylee23]

Not in the same realm, but my ex humiliated me by sharing sexually explicit details with his friends and my current boyfriend, as well as calling me out on Facebook just because I broke up with him in less than a moment's notice because of the long distance and his general condescending manner towards me.

Needless to say, after months of feeling high & mighty, he texts me daily trying to apologize and complains about the guilt he feels for it. Now, he was a total jerk, so even if YOU think you can get away without a single feeling of guilt, it will hit you eventually.

If you are between ages 18 and 24, then you've got a long life ahead of you to deal with that. We have a tendency to hurt guys, just as often as they hurt us. But I believe that is completely crossing the line for revenge. That's just cruel. Please think about the emotional as well as financial toll that will take on her, it couldn't possibly compare to how you might reflect on it down the road.

[hunibee]

Wow! I'm thinking you need to seek some counseling for holding onto a grudge this long and taking it to this extreme. Yes you probably could be sued if they can prove premeditation.

Just save everyone the money and break it off now. Her parents will most likely be able to get most of their money back. She is the one that wronged you not them.

You will have gotten enough revenge on her for breaking her heart even if you do it now. But do seek counseling for this. I don't think revenge is what will make you feel better.

[ElijahCynicism]

LOL, sh*t man. You're dedicated. Yeah, you can get sued, but I doubt they would. Traditionally when a person is jilted, they get the f*** away from the person that jilted them, they don't locate them and sue them. It has happened, I've seen it happen, but I mean, the odds are on your side.

You can do much worse, though. Pull some really extreme sh*t at the wedding that'll make her call it off. Then you can sue her for $3,000 dollars, hahahaa.

[BCRanger10]

Why would you do something like that? That has "immature high school BS" written all over it. Please tell me you're kidding about this.

[Anonymous]

f*** yes. id sue the sh*t out of you. gimmie my money back, bitch!

no seriously I'm pretty sure you can sue someone for having spent all that money. you can sue for almost anything really. you don't f*** with peoples money or property. also I'm pretty sure the argument would be made that you would be on the road to sharing assets and debts had you followed through, so there's some misleading and breaking the contract of payment on the wedding, as it would have been much easier to pay married than single and leading individual lives trying to move on. the debt youve left on her shoulders affects what she can and cannot do for a certain period of her life.

think about it. you can sue for damaging reputation, slander, libel, etc. why the hell wouldn't someone be able to sue you for ACTUAL waste of their money, time, and emotional distress/embarrassment. I feel bad for the guy/girl who tries that sh*t with me that's for sure.

[gummybear888]

go to counselling to relieve that pain or hurt you feel from her actions.

if she cared, she shouldn't humiliate you

don't waste time with someone who you find annoying.

I would just be honest and end it now.

if you're not happy, don't continue this on.

that's my advice, there is no such thing as 'revenge' because in this case, it's pre meditated and like you said, it's playing with fire. they know who you are and probably would be jerks and sue you back.

i know how it feels to be angry with someone...i was in a situation where I was around my ex for awhile while trying to date my current husband so...trust me I know but just focusing on yourself and finding a better girl is probably the better thing to do.

don't waste your time and emotions on leaving her at the altar.

she obviously doesn't deserve you.

[Anonymous]

Don't bring yourself down to her level. Show some class and respect (even if she and her family doesn't deserve it) by breaking it off now and getting on with your life. At least this way the next time you do meet a girl that is awesome and is good to you, you won't have to explain why you acted like an immature child with your ex-fiance. You will already put this girl into therapy or at the very least permanently hurt her if you tell her that after years of putting up with her and her issues that you don't love her and will never love her.

And for the record yes you can be sued in a civil lawsuit and may end up paying for restitution as well.

Break it off now, move on with your life, and pursue what makes you happy.

[carinabina820]

No you absolutely cannot get sued for leaving the girl at the altar. Not at all. But if you know already, do NOT even go to the wedding. Just break it off now. Revenge doesn't look good on anyone and a broken engagement is just as heartbreaking as getting left at the altar. Don't waste YOUR time and MONEY and just find someone BETTER SOONER.

[Darkfairie17]

Why be so petty about it? This happened a long time ago. If you thought it was disgusting back then you shouldn't have gotten back together with her. Break up with her now, why spend all that money just to leave her at the altar? Makes no sense to me. It just seems like petty revenge, you are bringing yourself down to her level by doing that. It will only make you look worse.

[Anonymous]

She might be able to sue you. If you want revenge, spare the expense and break it off now. I can assure you that having to tell people that her fiancé left her will be embarrassing and she will be heartbroken.

[lexy98]

Probably. But that's rude as hell! That's not revenge! She humiliated you...Yea...But you are gunna break her heart?! wtf! Don't marry. ! Just say what you were doing and don't spring it on her now! F***you and guys like you! That's cruel as hell. Us girls/ women are amazing and won't stop till we get you back equally or more then you hurt us! You don't know what your getting yourself into. Dumb f***!

[Ashley8282]

I've got a better idea. Why don't you send me that money?!