Why do people feel the need to point out my flaws?

[satanslittlesister]

Okay I know this may sound stupid but I will try my best to explain.I always seem to attract negative comment/opinions.I'm a bit of a loner.I have a few close friends that I will spend time with but majority of the time I'm by myself.I like to think of myself as being pretty confident.I know I'm not the best looking girl out there,but I know I am not ugly either.I also don't like being rude or bitchy.I am super nice to everyone and I'm very open minded.I'd rather help someone than hurt.Well I always seem to receive negative remarks.From guys it's usually about my breast size(pretty childish I know) ,From girls its usually about my weight.(that I'm too thin.) or that I'm not feminine enough for any guy. >-> Usually things like this don't get to me but lately I've been feeling down.I'm getting more insults than compliments and I'm beginning to think that what they say is true.x_x

[Arwens-Fire]

Hahaahaha!

I don't mean to laugh,but its funny when you realize WHY I'm laughing.

I often say I don't associate with girls,because girls seem to have the worst self esteem and they always seem to be COMPETING with each other.

I would bet all of the money in my bank account,that these girls who are criticizing you are JEALOUS as hell of you! Girls are notorious for doing this when they see a girl that is naturally and effortlessly pretty,naturally good shape (toned/thin),and with a nice personality. That just means in THEIR mind: YOU ARE A THREAT. So,why not try to do everything they can to break your self esteem and have you thinking less of yourself. Its the oldest game in the book. This is a lesson that you will have to learn now,because it will probably happen again.Its sadly the way people are. If I were you,I would stop hanging around people like that.You DON'T need them,or their comments.

I once had a friend from High school that I would frequently hang out with.Everytime we went out,she would make sure to do something that would piss me off,and then laugh at me for being upset.She would also try and throw water on me,or laugh at negative things that happened to me,that seemed to happen whenever she was around.Needless to say,It came out one day that she had low self esteem and confidence issues.Go Figure. I decided to take my tshirt/spandex wearing/combat boots wearing self,out of the equation,and I stopped spending any time around her.I was DONE.And guess what...I haven't looked back since.I've made plenty of NEW friends who aren't like her,so I don't miss her one bit.

Hopefully,you make the right decision with the people you are hanging around. Good luck.

[mymouthaintbig]

If that's you in your picture you are very prettyy!

I have been picked on a lot by people too for no good reason...

most of the time when it seems to be out of nowhere it usually that they feel intimidated and want to bring you down.

So they find random things to point out and figure if they keep pointing out stupid, insignificant things it will make them feel better about their insecurities and flaws.

I actually had my my guy friend do this. (whom I am slowly learning I don't like) We went out to eat and the whole night it was one sarcastic comment after the other...and they were little stupid insignificant things that weren't obvious until I left...then I was like "Woah...did he really say that?"

[fefe884]

If there are 5 things people need to know in life, one of them would be that you can NEVER please everyone, so never make that your goal no matter what circumstance you're in. For every single thing in life, you will ALWAYS find at least two people in the whole world that don't agree/like/tolerate something.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, and if there's anyone that makes you think otherwise, I suggest that you tell them to their face how you feel about their criticism and cut off contact with them until they apologize. But don't cut off contact with them without letting them know why you're doing so.

[Frostie]

Confidence comes from within, not without. Do not focus on their elbowing, it is normal "sibling competition"- not much different from stores competing against each other. How you feel, means nothing to them. Don't allow them to rent space in your mind, unless they are paying you to think about what they are saying. With that said, focus on what you enjoy.A person who can't handle time alone, probably can't handle themselves. One reason why I can't deal with the needy people in society always,constantly, wanting some form of attention non stop. I'm an introvert, I enjoy company, but not as much as your typical social butterfly.

[cavmanier]

Like the other guys said they are just negative. Your definitely not too skinny and are nice looking in general; boobs are a small part of what makes a girl sexy. Look at your eyes with your dark hair :O It's really pretty. I disagree with the guy saying we have to teach people how to treat you. People are how they are and I think it's a waste of energy to try and change them. Plus people don't tend to listen to others that say they're wrong. Overall I'd try and focus on more positive people that don't want to bring you down.

[may04]

Some people say things out of jealousy, or to mask their own insecurity. Others genuinely think they're giving you advice, but it doesn't turn out that way. Some people are shallow, immature, or don't stop to think of the impact if their words. It's hard to know exactly what these people are thinking when they say negative things to you. If they have motives or not. I don't think it's pathetic or weak to let these comments get to you a bit. The only thing you can try to do is surround yourself with new people, or only the people that don't make unnecessary, nasty remarks. Do what you can to prove the others out there that they're wrong.

[LexiNinja]

I think so many people are so fast to point out every single detail or thing they don't like about a person. That really, you shouldn't even worry about. Everyone is ALWAYS going to have something to say. You just have to get used to it. I say as long as you're comfortable with who YOU are, than I really wouldn't let the comments phase you. If anything, the ones pointing out your "flaws" are the ones who are admiring you the most. You just don't call someone out on something without paying attention to it. It may be easier said than done, but the way you feel about yourself should only play a significant importance in your life. F***everybody else.

[Anonymous]

I know how you feel. What is worse , you can't just ignore those people or be away from them. They are in your face :/ , it is even more difficult to deal with those people when they are a lot and more than you can handle. If you fought them, they win, if you didn't, they also win.

The older people get, the more immature and childish a lot of them become/end up being. Their brain cells get more damaged ,they end up more immature and childish than they were ever been.

All I can tell you to do is stay strong and don't let what they say or do put you down even though, it is so difficult to deal with things like that but be strong.

I Love your hair and eyes, you are very beautiful :) and you are not too skinny, you look just fine. People who tell you this are probably the people who want to lose weight and are very jealouse of you.

[Littletad]

F*** everyone else. Life's too short to be worrying about the negative things idiots spam at you. They're trying to feel better about themselves by feeding off on their hate for others. Keep your head high, spend time with true friends, and remember that these are the best years of your life.

[Racez]

People tend to find the flaws in a person no matter how pure and innocent she is.

We all experience these because no person wants someone whom they are close to stand out of the crowd. This is just the crab mentality.

It's better to ignore them, and live life with positivism and optimism.

[art_k]

Given your description of the remarks I wouldn't say those people really 'point out your flaws.' They're just retarded and somewhat envious. Through their nasty words they do nothing but reveal who they really are and why they're not even worth your time, nerves and attention.

Stay yourself and keep making new friends. I'm sure there are still plenty of good people out there who'd appreciate you as an individual and help you forget those nasty fools.

[shumailkazimi]

these people frustrated individuals who dnt have any other job other than to criticise others...but we can't be like them so just ignore them and move on...there is so much to accomplish ...n it will be a waste of time to give reactions to their thoughts

[Trendigirl17]

Everyone has their flaws including us girls, but that's what makes us different from each other, we are all unique in our own way. Just learn to except it. And to those who like to point out flaws in other people, it's probably because you are insecure yourself. And you want to feel betters about yourself so get over it.

[paintthesilent]

They probably envy your great personality they wish they were like you so they try to put you down make you less confident, seriously they suck just stay away from people like that, that's what I learn to do :)

[Zekeandluther79]

Their judgmental don't listen to them, your flaws are what make you you and there's nothing wrong with that! You know who you are nobody can change that!

[abzence]

It's called projection.

People tend to project their own flaws and insecurities onto others so they can criticise others instead of realising that the flaws are within themself.

[Moloch]

I like your hair. Anyway, I think the reason why people hate is because our type is unconventional. Anything against the norm is criticized, until it becomes mainstream. Stay the way you are, everyone is too busy trying to blend in.

[davidch]

Maybe because you are too nice to people. If someone disrespect you you have the right to be bitchy ^^

[skb94]

Don't listen to them. Just see it as them trying to make themselves feel better. People can be fake.. Also, we live in a world where you have to teach people how to treat you, so stick up for yourself.

[6Paul11]

They either really care about you and want you to improve yourself or they are just insecure.

[rts10272]

Misery loves company. Unhappy people like to make other people unhappy. Always remember this and you will be able to fend off criticism.