1% of men can knock up 100% of women, so women have far more sexual value than men, we will be attracted to a much larger percentage of girls, and if we are attracted to you we would much rather fuck you than be your friend. Men generally care very little about female friendship, we don't really want to be your friend most times. Its called batemans principle, and they have just decided to call it the friendzone, an apt name i suppose, since most times the guy isn't seeking friendship in the interactions, so when the girl designates him as a friend he gets friendzoned. If you don't like it don't be friends with men, we don't really want to be friends with you (or at least we would far prefer to fuck you than be your friend).
Yeah, unfortunately we can be a bit oblivious about this. I've only recently admitted to myself that the idea of any guy wanting to be my "friend" is complete bullshit, as 90% of the male friends I have had eventually made a move.
Of course friendzones exist... Ask any ugly chick pining for a hot guy who's too 'sweet' to reject her outright... Although maybe, it's a misnomer... Less of a friendzone and more of a exploitation/manipulation zone... I've been in the friendzone and put at least one girl there too
I have never been in the " Zone " , because my self respect would never allow this to happen , guys if she says no... erase her from your life , delete her details & move on & forget her !! Why do some guys become emotional Tampax Super Max's for some girl that has zero real interest in you?
You, dear sir, speak the absolute truth! Why should we men accept 'friendship' as a 'consolation prize', by a woman who thinks we are not good enough for her to date? It's better for us to walk out of the friend-zone AND her life with our head held high.
"The friendzone is a misogynistic, bullshit make believe land "nice guys" have come up with to demonize women for not wanting to date them, for exercising her right to say no. It's an excuse to ignore the fact that there might be a reason (s) for a woman to reject them or refuse to have sex with them like not being physically attracted to them or not being able to connect with them on an emotional level."
No... you completely misunderstand why guys resent the friendzone.
No she doesn't. She understands perfectly well. But this is relational aggression politicized -- the objective here is to convince anyone who will believe her that women who string men along don't exist and men who complain about it are just misogynistic shitlords.
I guess I've just dealt with enough feminists to be unburdened by any doubt. I've seen how they work. Literally everything they wail about is something feminists or women do to men (or its analog). Literally everything. Everything else is a fabrication -- usually an imputation of hostility or smug superiority, again generally the exact thing they're guilty of. (e. g. being disappointed because you didn't get sex or a relationship translates to feeling entitled to sex or a relationship)
The friendzone can be completely avoided by not staying friends with the person who rejected you. It's as simple as that. If someone is rejected and also offered friendship as a 'consolation prize' by the other person, it is always best to reject this offer of friendship. Just as a person is not OBLIGED to date a friend who develops feelings for them, the other person is not OBLIGED to be friends with someone he/she is romantically attracted to. It's as simple as that.
I honestly don't think you understand what the friend zone is. It's more of a rejection of intense feelings towards another rather than, "I tried to fuck, but she thinks i'm ugly." People who do that are not in the friend zone, they're just horny and stupid. It's the pain of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you (or for some other personal reason.)
"It's more of a rejection of intense feelings towards another rather than, "I tried to fuck, but she thinks i'm ugly." " That's your definition, scroll down and you'll see each and every guy has his own definition of it so how can such a place exist when the place everyone's referring to isn't even the same place. I've already proved my point.
FIRST: That is not my definition. My definition is: It's THE PAIN of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you. Not really, they're just saying what I said wasn't the right one i. e. Because of looks (which I can cite). Either that or they're saying you're wrong to some degree with a few who do agree and some who are natural. So, not only do you not understand it, you either didn't really look at what they were saying and just skimmed the first line and responded without an open mind or you're trying gain some kind of non-existing win out of this situation where (from what I see) most men disagreeing with you. I have evidence of my point being proven by other people. Do you want me to copy and paste every single person who used either the wrong one or simply disagreed with you? C&P only takes a couple clicks and organizing it all takes a couple minutes. Don't take statements out of context to get what you want out of it.
Yes please do. I'm a pretty rational person and I'd tried refuting everyone of them who disagreed, but I can't be bothered to do that for everyone of them. You're saying the definition of a friendzone is "THE PAIN of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you." But the true definition of a friendzone is as the term implies is a one of two people wants a relationship but the other just wants to be nothing more than friends hence being friend "zoned" and as I explained in my take that's just not possible. Either way go ahead and post the others definition and if it's clearly the same as yours then I'll gladly go ahead and disprove it. Also here's the official definition from google which obviously isn't the same as yours https://i.imgur.com/2vgjzCo.jpg as well as this website where people can list their own definition for the term www.urbandictionary.com/define.php and if you bothered reading it then you'll clearly see everyone's definition of it obviously differs from each other.
Your explanation: Guys think basic human decency entitles them to attention, affection, or sex from women. Movies are not real. Respect women.
My counterargument: The friendzone does exist
My explanation: Emotions don't 100% immediately die when someone says no.. especially intense emotional attraction... That's why you don't really understand what the friendzone really is (you must have never been in that position or you never really liked anyone in the first place). When you really read the main point of "The Friendzone is Not Real" part you are mainly addressing those who wanted sex moreover a relationship.
Here's an example since you think it's misogynistic: A woman really likes a guy that she's known for 5 years, they've been great friends the whole time and one day she finally asks him out and he says no and they remain friends. She still wants to be with him but respects that he doesn't. . . . THAT is the friendzone.
But the real meaning of the friendzoned is: where a guy ends up after he asks a girl out who would be completely compatible with him, but she says no, and 98% of the time it's because of his looks.
That's very similar to what happened to me. Guy asks out girl that talks to him all the time and for hours, claims to enjoy his company, claims he makes her happy, says all these sweet things, and it feels like compatibility - but rejects me because I wasn't "cool" enough.
See, I don't think that's necessarily the case. She would say somewhat flirty things about wanting to hug and cuddle me several times, and even asked once what I'd do if she tried to seduce me. I don't see the point of asking that question if the answer doesn't matter. It's definitely not something I'd ask someone that I didn't want to sleep with no matter what they said.
Also I think guys have some leeway when it comes to looks. If you have an interesting enough personality, you can get by with less than male-model looks. But I don't think that's my problem. I've gotten compliments about my looks, even from this very girl I'm talking about.
Saying the friend zone is not real is like saying trees aren't real. Of course it's real. I don't understand why there are people who deny it. Just because you don't understand it or know what it is, doesn't make it not real.
But it isn't real. Saying it is real is like saying drop bears exist. They don't.
The friend zone is nothing. Half the time s guy will say he's in the friend zone and he hasn't even asked the girl or received a hint that she doesn't feel the same way. If she hasn't said no. If she hasn't made any sign that she wouldn't date you, then you always have a chance. If she does say no, then you aren't in the friend zone. You're in the land of the rejected.
@BaileyisDarcy What you are saying is that because a particular case isn't the friend zone, that it doesn't exist. If I point to a car and say it's a tree, you can say it's not a tree, but you can't say trees don't exist.
By your own words you said "half the time". I agree that the cases you cited (in your middle paragraph) are not friend zone. But that does not mean it doesn't exist.
Friend zone is when one person (much more often the guy) has strong feelings for someone. Those feelings are not reciprocated. It's not the same as being rejected for a date. The differences are that they maintain an ongoing friendly relationship. That's where the word "friend" in friend zone comes from. But below the surface, the guy still retains strong feelings for the girl. He continues to hang around her as friends, because for him he'd rather be with her as friends than not at all. But the entire time what he really wants is something more.
This is far more likely to happen with a guy who is shy and is not able to express his feelings in a way that the girl understands. She may be completely unaware that he feels that way. From her point of view they are just friends. If you asked her if he is friend zoned, she may deny it, because she isn't even aware of it.
Even if he did express his feelings in some awkward way, and she didn't respond positively, she may not realize the extent of his feelings. If he's shy, if he's able to express interest at all, it probably comes across much more casually than it really is. So she doesn't think anything more of it. She also may not realize that's those feelings are ongoing, maybe for months or even years. Because to her, it appears on the surface as if they are just friends.
That's what friend zone is. It's not only real, it's very common.
@NearlyNapping Girls keep pushing agenda it doesn't exist because they don't want men to wisen up to it and continue to benefit from all the free shit (ego boost, help, free stuff, assistants) that they get from the male from it
the friendzone exists not only for guys but also for girls. if you´re romantically and sexually interested in a person but that person sees you as a friend and nothing more than that, you´re in the "friendzone"
it´s not misogynist bullshit. i´ve been in the friendzone and girls have been in my friendzone. it´s mundane and normal.
You obviously didn't read the take. Please read the following passages carefully and tell me how exactly is it possible for a man and a woman to remains friends after one of them rejects the other? "First of all when a women rejects a man, for whatever reason it maybe, there are only two things that a man can do; either move on with his life or remain friends. Whining about being friendzoned is not one of these things. Being friends with someone means appreciating them as a person and if you can't do that then you're simply not their friend, so move on."
"When it comes to the friendzone, one or both of the parties agree that they are friends under a misguided concept, when they are not. This inevitably leads to the person who rejected the relationship offer to become annoyed and bothered by the person who was rejected, while the one who is rejected constantly tries to change the rejection leading to both of them wasting their time."
yeah it´s easy to just say it cold logical like that as long as you´re not personally in the position.
but it´s painfull because you don´t want to lose a good friend because you do apreciate the person and at the same time it hurts like hell, because you know you want more than that but can´t have it. "the person constantly tries to change the rejection" no that´s not necessarily the case but he/she will get depression every so often and be very sad. you´re constantly trying to get the other person out of your life but your feelings prevent you from actually doing it.
so say you are in that position. you love a guy + you like him as a friend but he doesn´t get pissed off by your advances and is just sweet and allways tries to help you. i guess you can´t understand if you personally haven´t been in that position.
I don't see friendzone as being told know. I would love to be told no. Friendzone is her using indirect excuses to navigate around the question at hand so as to keep him around when females want him to be. That's friendzone.
Ah, another "the friendzone is misogynistic" rant from a feminist. You all need to get yourselves a dictionary and actually learn the denotation of "misogynistic" so you can stop yourselves from using it incorrectly.
All friend zone means is she will never like you more than just friends. And for a lot of the guys I've dated I will never like them emotionally. It's something girls and guys need to accept, 1/100 people might like you.
If a girl says "Let's just be friends", Sa, "I was hoping for more than that. I have too many friends as it is and no time". Say "Fuck you very much", walk off and never look back and DON'T speak to her unless she grovels back toward you. If a girl rejects you, then she MUST accept that you DON'T want to be friends. Why should you?
so when i was friend zoned it was made because i was cowerredly and after i confessed my love to someone who said i thought of you only as a friend an wanted to stay that way is just my imagination?
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Anonymous
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Were you angry while writing this post. I can see some aggretion here.
Obviously a woman would say this to continue to delude and use more men with the possibility of having sex/relationship with her if they continue to be a "good friend" and do stuff/free things for her without any reciprocation.
No but no one asked the girl to continue to lead these men on and take their stuff with the faint deception of if they continue to do it she might reciprocate with appreciation/love/sex/relationship with them.
The women in question is still a manipulative user, who is leading the guys on to continue to get the benefits she gets from them.
It amuses me that nearly every single take or topic that starts out claiming "the friendzone isn't real" eventually admits that it's real and just objects to it being called "friendzone."
Because it's not, the way people think of it isn't the way it was supposed to come off as. Like I said "The friendzone is a misogynistic, bullshit make believe land "nice guys" have come up with to demonize women for not wanting to date them, for exercising her right to say no." You're not someone's friend when you keep whining about being "just a friend". It couldn't get any clearer than that.
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1% of men can knock up 100% of women, so women have far more sexual value than men, we will be attracted to a much larger percentage of girls, and if we are attracted to you we would much rather fuck you than be your friend. Men generally care very little about female friendship, we don't really want to be your friend most times. Its called batemans principle, and they have just decided to call it the friendzone, an apt name i suppose, since most times the guy isn't seeking friendship in the interactions, so when the girl designates him as a friend he gets friendzoned. If you don't like it don't be friends with men, we don't really want to be friends with you (or at least we would far prefer to fuck you than be your friend).
Yeah, unfortunately we can be a bit oblivious about this. I've only recently admitted to myself that the idea of any guy wanting to be my "friend" is complete bullshit, as 90% of the male friends I have had eventually made a move.
Of course friendzones exist... Ask any ugly chick pining for a hot guy who's too 'sweet' to reject her outright... Although maybe, it's a misnomer... Less of a friendzone and more of a exploitation/manipulation zone... I've been in the friendzone and put at least one girl there too
I have never been in the " Zone " , because my self respect would never allow this to happen , guys if she says no... erase her from your life , delete her details & move on & forget her !! Why do some guys become emotional Tampax Super Max's for some girl that has zero real interest in you?
You, dear sir, speak the absolute truth! Why should we men accept 'friendship' as a 'consolation prize', by a woman who thinks we are not good enough for her to date? It's better for us to walk out of the friend-zone AND her life with our head held high.
@aficionado It also happens with women not just men
LOL
"The friendzone is a misogynistic, bullshit make believe land "nice guys" have come up with to demonize women for not wanting to date them, for exercising her right to say no. It's an excuse to ignore the fact that there might be a reason (s) for a woman to reject them or refuse to have sex with them like not being physically attracted to them or not being able to connect with them on an emotional level."
No... you completely misunderstand why guys resent the friendzone.
No she doesn't. She understands perfectly well. But this is relational aggression politicized -- the objective here is to convince anyone who will believe her that women who string men along don't exist and men who complain about it are just misogynistic shitlords.
@Transigence yes... but if I don't give @asker the benefit of the doubt, then I'd be lowering myself to her level.
I guess I've just dealt with enough feminists to be unburdened by any doubt. I've seen how they work. Literally everything they wail about is something feminists or women do to men (or its analog). Literally everything. Everything else is a fabrication -- usually an imputation of hostility or smug superiority, again generally the exact thing they're guilty of. (e. g. being disappointed because you didn't get sex or a relationship translates to feeling entitled to sex or a relationship)
And you completely misunderstand what exactly is the friendzone.
@IamNuts then what is the friendzone?
The friendzone can be completely avoided by not staying friends with the person who rejected you. It's as simple as that. If someone is rejected and also offered friendship as a 'consolation prize' by the other person, it is always best to reject this offer of friendship. Just as a person is not OBLIGED to date a friend who develops feelings for them, the other person is not OBLIGED to be friends with someone he/she is romantically attracted to. It's as simple as that.
I honestly don't think you understand what the friend zone is.
It's more of a rejection of intense feelings towards another rather than, "I tried to fuck, but she thinks i'm ugly."
People who do that are not in the friend zone, they're just horny and stupid.
It's the pain of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you (or for some other personal reason.)
"It's more of a rejection of intense feelings towards another rather than, "I tried to fuck, but she thinks i'm ugly." "
That's your definition, scroll down and you'll see each and every guy has his own definition of it so how can such a place exist when the place everyone's referring to isn't even the same place.
I've already proved my point.
FIRST: That is not my definition.
My definition is: It's THE PAIN of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you.
Not really, they're just saying what I said wasn't the right one i. e. Because of looks (which I can cite). Either that or they're saying you're wrong to some degree with a few who do agree and some who are natural. So, not only do you not understand it, you either didn't really look at what they were saying and just skimmed the first line and responded without an open mind or you're trying gain some kind of non-existing win out of this situation where (from what I see) most men disagreeing with you. I have evidence of my point being proven by other people. Do you want me to copy and paste every single person who used either the wrong one or simply disagreed with you? C&P only takes a couple clicks and organizing it all takes a couple minutes. Don't take statements out of context to get what you want out of it.
Yes please do. I'm a pretty rational person and I'd tried refuting everyone of them who disagreed, but I can't be bothered to do that for everyone of them.
You're saying the definition of a friendzone is "THE PAIN of wanting a relationship from someone who simply doesn't feel the same way about you."
But the true definition of a friendzone is as the term implies is a one of two people wants a relationship but the other just wants to be nothing more than friends hence being friend "zoned" and as I explained in my take that's just not possible. Either way go ahead and post the others definition and if it's clearly the same as yours then I'll gladly go ahead and disprove it.
Also here's the official definition from google which obviously isn't the same as yours
https://i.imgur.com/2vgjzCo.jpg as well as this website where people can list their own definition for the term www.urbandictionary.com/define.php and if you bothered reading it then you'll clearly see everyone's definition of it obviously differs from each other.
... You have to be trolling me. You seriously cited your evidence from a different site? You can't be that stupid.
"You seriously cited your evidence from a different site? "
WTF are you talking about? Where else do you want the definition from, china.
Your thesis: The friendzone does not exist
Your explanation: Guys think basic human decency entitles them to attention, affection, or sex from women. Movies are not real. Respect women.
My counterargument: The friendzone does exist
My explanation: Emotions don't 100% immediately die when someone says no.. especially intense emotional attraction... That's why you don't really understand what the friendzone really is (you must have never been in that position or you never really liked anyone in the first place). When you really read the main point of "The Friendzone is Not Real" part you are mainly addressing those who wanted sex moreover a relationship.
Here's an example since you think it's misogynistic: A woman really likes a guy that she's known for 5 years, they've been great friends the whole time and one day she finally asks him out and he says no and they remain friends. She still wants to be with him but respects that he doesn't. . . . THAT is the friendzone.
But the real meaning of the friendzoned is: where a guy ends up after he asks a girl out who would be completely compatible with him, but she says no, and 98% of the time it's because of his looks.
That's very similar to what happened to me. Guy asks out girl that talks to him all the time and for hours, claims to enjoy his company, claims he makes her happy, says all these sweet things, and it feels like compatibility - but rejects me because I wasn't "cool" enough.
@TheSkaFish yeah, that was definitely because she wasn't physically attracted to you then
See, I don't think that's necessarily the case. She would say somewhat flirty things about wanting to hug and cuddle me several times, and even asked once what I'd do if she tried to seduce me. I don't see the point of asking that question if the answer doesn't matter. It's definitely not something I'd ask someone that I didn't want to sleep with no matter what they said.
Also I think guys have some leeway when it comes to looks. If you have an interesting enough personality, you can get by with less than male-model looks. But I don't think that's my problem. I've gotten compliments about my looks, even from this very girl I'm talking about.
@TheSkaFish Well then you're some weird exception and that girl is some weird exception. Do ya want a cookie or something?
No, not really. What I do want is to learn how to beat the "bad boys" once and for all and change the way things with women go for me.
Saying the friend zone is not real is like saying trees aren't real. Of course it's real. I don't understand why there are people who deny it. Just because you don't understand it or know what it is, doesn't make it not real.
But it isn't real. Saying it is real is like saying drop bears exist. They don't.
The friend zone is nothing. Half the time s guy will say he's in the friend zone and he hasn't even asked the girl or received a hint that she doesn't feel the same way. If she hasn't said no. If she hasn't made any sign that she wouldn't date you, then you always have a chance.
If she does say no, then you aren't in the friend zone. You're in the land of the rejected.
@BaileyisDarcy
What you are saying is that because a particular case isn't the friend zone, that it doesn't exist. If I point to a car and say it's a tree, you can say it's not a tree, but you can't say trees don't exist.
By your own words you said "half the time". I agree that the cases you cited (in your middle paragraph) are not friend zone. But that does not mean it doesn't exist.
Friend zone is when one person (much more often the guy) has strong feelings for someone. Those feelings are not reciprocated. It's not the same as being rejected for a date. The differences are that they maintain an ongoing friendly relationship. That's where the word "friend" in friend zone comes from. But below the surface, the guy still retains strong feelings for the girl. He continues to hang around her as friends, because for him he'd rather be with her as friends than not at all. But the entire time what he really wants is something more.
This is far more likely to happen with a guy who is shy and is not able to express his feelings in a way that the girl understands. She may be completely unaware that he feels that way. From her point of view they are just friends. If you asked her if he is friend zoned, she may deny it, because she isn't even aware of it.
Even if he did express his feelings in some awkward way, and she didn't respond positively, she may not realize the extent of his feelings. If he's shy, if he's able to express interest at all, it probably comes across much more casually than it really is. So she doesn't think anything more of it. She also may not realize that's those feelings are ongoing, maybe for months or even years. Because to her, it appears on the surface as if they are just friends.
That's what friend zone is. It's not only real, it's very common.
@NearlyNapping Girls keep pushing agenda it doesn't exist because they don't want men to wisen up to it and continue to benefit from all the free shit (ego boost, help, free stuff, assistants) that they get from the male from it
that´s just wrong peroid.
the friendzone exists not only for guys but also for girls. if you´re romantically and sexually interested in a person but that person sees you as a friend and nothing more than that, you´re in the "friendzone"
it´s not misogynist bullshit. i´ve been in the friendzone and girls have been in my friendzone. it´s mundane and normal.
You obviously didn't read the take.
Please read the following passages carefully and tell me how exactly is it possible for a man and a woman to remains friends after one of them rejects the other?
"First of all when a women rejects a man, for whatever reason it maybe, there are only two things that a man can do; either move on with his life or remain friends. Whining about being friendzoned is not one of these things.
Being friends with someone means appreciating them as a person and if you can't do that then you're simply not their friend, so move on."
"When it comes to the friendzone, one or both of the parties agree that they are friends under a misguided concept, when they are not. This inevitably leads to the person who rejected the relationship offer to become annoyed and bothered by the person who was rejected, while the one who is rejected constantly tries to change the rejection leading to both of them wasting their time."
yeah it´s easy to just say it cold logical like that as long as you´re not personally in the position.
but it´s painfull because you don´t want to lose a good friend because you do apreciate the person and at the same time it hurts like hell, because you know you want more than that but can´t have it.
"the person constantly tries to change the rejection" no that´s not necessarily the case but he/she will get depression every so often and be very sad.
you´re constantly trying to get the other person out of your life but your feelings prevent you from actually doing it.
so say you are in that position. you love a guy + you like him as a friend but he doesn´t get pissed off by your advances and is just sweet and allways tries to help you. i guess you can´t understand if you personally haven´t been in that position.
I don't see friendzone as being told know. I would love to be told no. Friendzone is her using indirect excuses to navigate around the question at hand so as to keep him around when females want him to be. That's friendzone.
know = no*
Ah, another "the friendzone is misogynistic" rant from a feminist. You all need to get yourselves a dictionary and actually learn the denotation of "misogynistic" so you can stop yourselves from using it incorrectly.
I'm not a feminist but eh..
Friendzone is often a term used by people who has been guilted into not able to have sex as expected by their manly friends.
All friend zone means is she will never like you more than just friends. And for a lot of the guys I've dated I will never like them emotionally. It's something girls and guys need to accept, 1/100 people might like you.
If a girl says "Let's just be friends", Sa, "I was hoping for more than that. I have too many friends as it is and no time". Say "Fuck you very much", walk off and never look back and DON'T speak to her unless she grovels back toward you. If a girl rejects you, then she MUST accept that you DON'T want to be friends. Why should you?
so when i was friend zoned it was made because i was cowerredly and after i confessed my love to someone who said i thought of you only as a friend an wanted to stay that way is just my imagination?
Were you angry while writing this post. I can see some aggretion here.
Nah not really but I guess I did come off as a little aggressive :P
Obviously a woman would say this to continue to delude and use more men with the possibility of having sex/relationship with her if they continue to be a "good friend" and do stuff/free things for her without any reciprocation.
"use more men" How so? No one asked that guy to shower her with gifts and free stuff.
No but no one asked the girl to continue to lead these men on and take their stuff with the faint deception of if they continue to do it she might reciprocate with appreciation/love/sex/relationship with them.
The women in question is still a manipulative user, who is leading the guys on to continue to get the benefits she gets from them.
Women aren't idiots. They know exactly what is gong on. Stop trying to pretend you guys are so clueless about this.
It amuses me that nearly every single take or topic that starts out claiming "the friendzone isn't real" eventually admits that it's real and just objects to it being called "friendzone."
Because it's not, the way people think of it isn't the way it was supposed to come off as. Like I said "The friendzone is a misogynistic, bullshit make believe land "nice guys" have come up with to demonize women for not wanting to date them, for exercising her right to say no."
You're not someone's friend when you keep whining about being "just a friend". It couldn't get any clearer than that.
Women are demons in disguise
I agree. The same goes for women who complain about the friendzone.
Fun fact: Friendzone was popularized by the show Friends!