Women Over 85 are Happier After Their Husbands Have Died, Finds New Study (Page 2)
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This is total BS. No one is forcing women to get married or have a family or to be submissive. It seems like you're one of those feminist who blame men for all women's problems. lmao.
So what would you do if you had a family, and suddenly your wife just decided that she will go out for work and come home and sit on the couch? Will you just leave the children and have no one take care of them? Yes, no one forces you to get married and have children. But once you do, you have responsibility. No one forces the men in question to get married and have children and leave their partner to deal with everything either.
Also, cuz y'all are snow flakes, yes, #notallmen. ffs
she is exactly that.
@VegetaSSB And you're on of those guys who believes the world is a binary where only good and evil exist, and every woman who has an opinion that doesn't match yours or is even slightly critical of mean must be a raging feminist who hates men, and not maybe, a person who has some sincere concerns. Grow up.
*one *men
You say women should not conform according to what traditional gender roles want from them but we should conform to what one study says? doesn't make much sense to me.
I'd like to see the studies. This seems a lot like an underhanded attempt to discourage people from having families.
Google it, it's a study from the NHS.
I can't find the study itself. Just links bouncing from one news outlet to another. It's your take, so you should probably take responsibility and provide relevant information.
'Google it' is not a valid reply to someone asking for sources
@Toad-1 I mean I'd take it under some circumstances. For instance, "Adolf Hitler was born on April 20th." I don't think someone should be troubled with something like that. But a study like this? Yeah, I'd like to see the study.
@Toad-1 It is when I gave you the actual publication and when you know the date from looking at the news articles. It took me 2 minutes to find the survey, if you guys can't use the internet, that's not my problem, I'm not your mother.
It has nothing to do with us being lazy. There are rules to how logic works
@Toad-1 Yes, and apparently yours doesn't work very well or you would add 1+1 and go on the nhs website and look at their recent surveys.
You never took logic courses in class apparently
@Toad-1 I obviously took more classes than you, since I'm able to find scientific information within a minute once I know the topic, publication date and publication and you're still here whining about how not everything in life is served on a silver platter.
You make the claim, you back it up with sources. That's how this works.
@Toad-1 I did. I told you where it's from. You click on the website and see there's only one big recent survey. Your laziness isn't my issue.
Not good enough. You need to provide the direct link since it's a website.
@Toad-1 Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you weren't able to use your brain.
Nor you.
Can you show us the study itself or not?
You can click on the website and look at it. The survey is divided into different parts with PDFs and Excel sheets to back each part. You can click on each part and look at the info you need, like a big boy.
Right except I don't feel like digging through charts for two hours. As a person putting forth a claim, it is your obligation to provide relevant and factual information on the matter. You are not meeting your obligation.
She's just gonna keep calling you names lol
@Toad-1 I don't have an obligation to do anything, don't be so entitled. If you want to have a discussion, go to the paper, scroll down to the one section that talks about age and gender and read it. Literally, took me two minutes. If you're not willing to do that, move on, because obviously you don't care.
I factcheck news articles I read all the time and I don't whine because the reporter didn't give me a direct link to the study. It's not common practice in news, so why should a myTake be on a standard of an academic paper. What news do is give you enough information to look for it yourself, and then you just do it if you care. In our day and age, being capable of checking information quickly and efficiently should be a basic life skill.
If the agenda is that men should respect their partners and not expect them to serve them while still working full-time, then I'll gladly push it.
This is her comment on another one !!! the bitch exposed !!! lol
@AlphaStyle89 You're old enough to know you shouldn't call a woman bitch. Also yes, if both partners work, sharing home duties is a no-brainer. If you don't want that, find a partner who doesn't want a full-time job. Don't just expect your partner to work double, why would you do that?
Most women out live their husbands so I would imagine when they hit 85 years old and their husband passes away earlier they would have a plenty to be happy about when the insurance kicks in and what money is left to the surviving spouse in the will.
They're 85 though, at that point money doesn't mean that much anymore. Like, what are you gonna do? Buy a new house? Go on vacation away from your family? Buy more jewelry?
It also doesn't explain why men are comparably unhappy after 85, meanwhile the caretaker role would explain that, because now they're on their own.
I've tried really hard to come up with other explanations, but I really can't see any other ones that account for an comparative increase in women's wellbeing and decrease in men's. I'm open to suggestions though, that's why I posted this!
I think maybe they just feel happier without the husband around if he treated her like crap throughout the marriage and she basically just stayed with the guy for the worse times and rode it out till either of them passed away.
Where is this men are unhappy after 85, coming from?
I know a few guy in the age group, and they are far from being unhappy.
thats not a real study lol
regardless, why are u trying to push an agenda?
It's a survey by the National Health Service getting information from over 8000 people. That's pretty real.
If the agenda is that men should respect their partners and not expect them to serve them while still working full-time, then I'll gladly push it.
but where's the link?
Also men involved in traditional relationships doesn't mean they don't respect their partners, whatever floats ppls boats ya know.
How are none of you able to find this? You grew up using the internet just like me, didn't you?
Fine, here: http://digital.nhs.uk/catalogue/PUB30169
I have a whole paragraph writing about how if it's a mutual understanding that was talked about, that's totally cool. For lots of people in the past it wasn't, it was just what was expected. And I've been in relationships now too where guys expect me after a while to take care of their apartments, as well as mine. Which is ridiculous, and which is why I left them and found someone who respects me.
Lol Troll, you claim a study that never existed, than link to a study about obesity, and smoking rates in the UK... Epic Troll fail!
Go back under your bridge!
just like most women here in japan, very happy with the money the husband brings home but depressed when they actually have to spend time with the man.
i do not have sympathy for such bullshit.
And the high suicide rates of men, show that they are also happy with their lives?
No, but there might be more men who are very unhappy than women, but generally more women who are unhappy. I'm not sure, I haven't looked that up. But they aren't mutually exclusive statistics.
Actually women attempt to commit more sucicde than men. But men get it right in the first try. That's the true statistics. Women are actually more unhappy.
@Warmapplecrumble I've seen that figure. Unfortunately the "study" behind it is questionable. I honestly do not think that women are inherently incompetent.
I tried like 10 times to kill myself. And I do it wrong every time. That I gave up.
I didn't hold the knife properly. And didn't have enough inital strength to push it inside me.
... both genders want to die equally.
@Warmapplecrumble Again 7 out of 10 suicides are men are you telling me that women are just incompetent in suicide? I do not believe that men have an inherent skill in killing themselves.
I have no statistics on the topic by gender, but I think about 60% all gun deaths are suicides. And guns are the most 'successful' way to commit suicide. And I'm assuming women are less likely to own guns, based on what I know from my American friends. So that could play into male suicide attempts being more successful.
Again, that's just a hypothesis though, I don't really know much about suicides in the U. S..
Well I wrote down my personal story about suicide... but your ego is so high to prove everyone wrong that you don't want to listen to a different opinion.
Yes women are actually bad at killing themselves. In majority of the countries guns are illegal like the UK, its very hard to try and kill yourself using drugs, knifes etc. But I know that women actually would have higher rates of suicide if they could properly kill themselves. Especially in third world countries.
@Warmapplecrumble That's because the majority of women that attempt suicide, it is usually to get attention and not a serious attempt to end their lives.
@Warmapplecrumble so you admit you were not seriously attempting to end your life.
@Hal2002 ...
@Warmapplecrumble there are some very simple ways for example carbon monoxide
OP you should look into how SHINee leader jonghyun killed himself a few days ago. it's the most popular way in s. korea. poisoning is also very easy.
@COCOCHANEL thanks I'll look into it
@Warmapplecrumble it's probably painful though so i'm not saying to do it
oh my god shocker, did they really need a scientific study to find out bitches like cashing in on that top shelf life-insurance policy...
Plot twist : they don't even remember they were married
Dont get married then and the problem is solved. Dont tell men what to do. Tell women not to get married or to divorce if they dont like marriage ffs.
As a man you have a responsibility too when you get married. If you're not able to deal with that, you're not fit for marriage. In this case the men are the one not pulling their weight, not the women. If you're not able to love your partner enough to carry the burden with her, let her find someone who can.
Yes iam not fit for the marriage and she should not marry me, iam not forcing her. Iam way too young to be married anyways so its not about me.
Also there is a thing called divorce. If you are not happy in the marriage fking divorce, dont try to change people and force them to be what they dont want to be. No one should be forced to be/do what they dont want. If a woman is not happy as you said *doing two jobs* dont fking get married. No one can force you do to anything so just dont.
Agree with your last sentence, she should find someone else who is more adequate for her yes.
Once again, not that easy if you want to build a family. If you as a man aren't ready to be in a partnership, don't get married. Obviously the woman in this scenario is ready, which is why she's looking to get married.
Divorce isn't that easy. You'll have to look at your finances, if you have kids, you have to determine who gets them, etc, etc
Hey, don't blame your shitty marriage on everyone else.
I'm not married, but experienced this first hand in my family. My mother became much happier after my father passed, because now she can do what she wants and does not have to clean up after him all day (his hobby was forestry, so he'd always be full of mud and walk through the house and get dirt everywhere, because he never cleaned and would refuse to take the dirty clothes of in the garage, little things like that drive women crazy after 40 years of marriage.)
My grandparents are both 90 and sick right now. My grandpa is in a wheelchair and my grandma can barely walk because her legs are swollen like tree trunks. And still she cares for him, helps him go to the toilet, helps to wash him, makes him food. Meanwhile, when she hit her head and was unable to walk, my mother had to go in every day and care for her (my grandpa still could walk then).
It's much better for women now, but I think it's an important thing to think about. The care taker role takes up lot of mental energy.
I made sure to find a partner for myself who cares for me as much as I care for him, but I worry for the women who get stuck with men who keep thinking that everything they do is more important than what their wives do. Especially in this day and age, it usually isn't. Both jobs are important, both lives are important, both people should care for each other.
My great grandma is 87 she still cook a and cleans and gets sound better than many. She plays the role of a housewife which is something she chose to do.
It may be true that women are happier in their widowhood, but that men are happier before that than women, I doubt that. Men commit suicide more.
This is an overall average. Meaning men have a higher well-being on average. That doesn't mean there can be more variation in men. It could be that most women are very close to the average, whereas many men are way above average, and some way below average, which then evens out.
I'm not saying we should ignore male well-being at all, or not care about men. I obviously care about all the men in my life and would do anything for them. Even now, whenever I'm home, I cook for my grandfather and help out my grandmother (my brother doesn't.) But I hope that for my generation of women we can take care of each other, that our partners can take care of us as well. And i don't mean finances, many of us got that covered.
I am mostly just trying to make the point that psychology is not an exact science my history with therapists has been less than ideal.
I'm very sorry to hear that. I think we all need to be more kind to each other and our partners. I hope you'll feel better.
Tried to find the source. Instead, all it shows are other opinion websites talking about it and not a single one of them had a citation. Hmmm...
Seriously though. It's clear from your statements you're just doing the whole "Men! Fix everything" mentality. Don't get married. If you don't like how marriage is then you can fix it. Don't complain and then demand someone else fix it. Why should they? If you don't like something then it's on you to fix it or abandon it. Not someone else. Don't be such a sloth.
I told you it's from the NHS. What you do is, you go on the NHS website and look at the survey. Why is this so hard for y'all?
Also if you go to the NHS website it does not have this study. You can look under both older people and mental health sections and neither have anything that come close to talking about this. Nice fake article.
https://www.nhs.uk/news/older-people/?order=newest
https://www.nhs.uk/news/mental-health/
Also, take responsibility. Most women who get married don't think that they will end up with 2 jobs, unless it's discussed that they will be the stay-at-home mom. In any grown-up partnership where both partners work, it should be a no-brainer that both partners share household chores. If that's not something you're ready for, don't get married. But don't tell the women who were ready to do their part they are sloths after you tricked them. Jfc
I'm just going to take a guess and say that this study never existed and you yourself have never found it on the NHS website. Someone claimed that they did and all these news websites didn't actually do their research to see if it was true or not and just assumed it was true.
It's so sad how little research and investigation you people do nowadays.
Take responsibility for what? If I'm unhappy about something I do something about it (telling other people to do something about it is not doing something about it. That's just called complaining and nagging)
You're the one that needs to take responsibility. Your entire argument is just telling other people to fix an issue that you have.
It's on the NHS website. Look under surveys and click at the 2016 nationwide survey. Then go to the appropriate section in the survey. You all have never looked at an actual government website, have you.
Survey? So it's not a study? Your story is beginning to change.
https://www.nhs.uk/pages/home.aspx
there is no survey on their website unless we are looking at two different NHS websites in the UK. And I normally don't look at UK government websites.
If you actually would have had the citation you'd have posted it by now to rub my face in it. You haven't which means it doesn't exist.
jfc, you all really are too stupid to use the internet. Here ya go hun, your silver platter:
http://digital.nhs.uk/catalogue/PUB30169
Silver platter of something that doesn't talk about 85 year old women being happier. But at least you're attempting to provide sources to whatever dumb notion you're trying to push forward so you at least get participation points for that.
It's literally in the data. I'm sorry you don't know how to read charts.
okay now I am having second thoughts about marriage... :P
This makes me very sad because my Dad is very similar to my Mum.
From my experience, my grandmothers live a better life now without their husbands.
And yet new studies show that women are generally less happy than they were 60 years ago.
Yes, and they surveys found why. Because women report that while their happiness in employment increased, things in the household management did not change much. So now they basically do two jobs.
Not at all what was found.
So I'm the one dying at 85 years old while you go on living but I'm supposed to care of you during all this? Hmm... :thinking:
Did you just forget that men also have a burden in these scenarios, i. e dying and death?
I don't believe that. You would have to check if women were also happier after their husband would die way younger than that.