I'm sure many girls around the world wonder: "Why doesn't he want something serious with me?", "Am I not good enough for him?" , so did I as well for many years. I've met many guys in my life, dated some of them, received comments as "Wow you're so attractive.." etc., but yet I never made it to something longer than three months.
That is, up until last year when I moved to another country. I met a guy through a mutual friend. He was this type of open-minded, extrovert, full of life and many different interests. Shortly after we met we started dating and so did we for three months. After that time he broke up with me, saying he was losing his feelings. Although I was hurt at that time, we both moved on with our lives, but somehow we stayed friends and never stopped meeting. That story went for almost a year. In that time we were both dating other people so I never tried to impress him, I was just myself and when we were hanging out I slowly began to show him some of my interests and hobbies, he did as well. We got to know each other on a really deep level, we became super close friends, sharing not only the happy moments, but also the not-so-good ones.
All that had its reflection on him and his feelings started to grow back. He said he didn't believe in the second chance (and he's the most honest person I know), but yet he gave in to his feelings. Three months ago we started dating again and everything was at a whole new level. We understood each other so well, we talked even more, the sex has always been great, I won't lie about that, so it just added up to the rest.
But what was so different this time? Why is he seeing more in me now? I'm still me...he's still him.
Many girls, when they find themselves liking someone want all their attention and time, they don't let the guy miss them, and a GUY FALLS IN LOVE with your absence, NOT your presence. So this time when we started everything again I took it not so seriously. I didn't texted him that often, I let him chill with the guys, not making him feel like he needed to go earlier so he could spend time with me.
In one word I was CHILL about everything. We went to a birthday party once and instead of sticking all the time to him, what I did was I went and talked to new people and had lots of fun. That way you're showing that the guy is not your source of happiness, YOU ARE. By giving him freedom I made myself stand out from the other women he met. I was also very supportive and showed interest in the things he's interested in.
And here we are three months later I got this amazing guy to ask me to be his girl, a guy who didn't believe in the second chance gave me one. I did all of this subconsciously, but after I read and watched videos from dating coaches I found out that that was the exact way of making a guy commit.
As last tips to everyone who finds themselves in my situation:
1. Put yourself FIRST. Don't leave your friends, hobbies or activities behind to be available 100% of the time. Guys LOVE girls who are busy and enjoy life at its fullest.
2. Be passionate about life.
3. Don't be blinded by a guy, if he doesn't meet your standards - LEAVE. Move on and the right one for you will come.
4. When you finally find someone worthy of your attention, give him freedom. You'll be surprised by the result.
5. Notice his ACTS, NOT his WORDS!
This is my story and with it I just hope to help everyone who's stuck in my situation. <3
And last, but not least - YOU ARE WORTH IT! YOU ARE ENOUGH JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! .. if you feel like you are not, then you haven't found the RIGHT guy yet. xxx