Dad Bod vs ABs

[Anonymous]

I wanted to address two issues that keep popping up.

1. For some crazy reason guys think women prefer men "like their dads" (if he was a good dad)

2. Just because women aren't crazy obsessed with perfecting a man's body that it means we prefer a fat one over a fit one.

Women may look for (personality) qualities her dad had in a man but they are NEVER physical attributes I can promise you that. Any woman looking for a man that "looks like their dad" has issues.

We may want a may who is "responsible, can provide, treats the wife with respect and spends time with his kids" ... just like their dads did but no one wants to date their effing dad.

If a woman could find all the admirable (personality) qualities in a man who is also fit with ABs and has a great face OF COURSE we would choose that guy.

Women grow to understand that we need to compromise somewhere sometimes. And generally we'd prefer the guy with the great qualities who will be a great father to our children even if that guy happens to look like peter griffin or winne the pooh.

A lot of the time it just happens that a guy will evolve into the dad bod. we fall for a guy that is hot and then over the years he gains a few and now has a dad bod but by then we are in love with him and it usually doesn't matter at all.

We want a good man for us and our hypothetical children and it'd be nice if we could also pass on some hot genes to these kids too. But we don't prefer dad bods, stop asking.

No one goes to the bar or the beach and drools over the dad bods. It's just not ever just about the body for us.

We also understand the pressures society places on looks because we feel them every second of our lives so we try to be more open minded with how our man can look. Our fantasy is more about how manly our man is (independent, trust worthy, reliable, self sufficient, etc) and how well he treats us and our children and less about chizzled this and sculpted that. That being said if we could get a guy who is chizzled and sculpted and would be a great family man than we pick him.

Go to they gym, stop making excuses.

If you want a hot girl, you damn well better be hot yourself.

It is work.

**

We all have preferences in looks, mine ideally is a guy who is fit, not skinny and not buff, and definitely no big belly. Like a swimmer's body. But i've dated chubby and i've dated skinny -ultimately I'll take the -person- over his body. but I like a guy who I feel like is stronger than I am and doesn't have giant weird pec boobs.

[Anonymous]

“Great personality, fit with abs, attractive and tall...”
What about you? Are you fit, attractive and have a great personality?
There are points, which I agree but some are generell statements. Some matured women tend to prefer more men with financial and social status.
You talking about men needing to work out if they want someone hot but what about the opponent? Are you really that perfect that you be perfectionist on a guy?
Don’t take this personal but almost all women I’ve known, don’t even know what they want. They want someone 6ft tall but end up dating someone shorter, they want someone attractive but end up falling in love with someone average. Women just have to admit it. It is very easy to make them fall in love by just impressing them with conversation skills. Once you guys fall into that trap, there’s no way out, unless we leave. I’ve been there loads of times and I’m an average looking guy. I just can’t take it serious when women make statements about what kind of appearance they desire in us men. You guys never gonna get that “dream man” anyway because they don’t exist and even if they do, they dating already some “dream women” and not you. Everybody has flaws. If your partner is chubby, encourage him to do sports, go on long walks with him instead of switching to handsome squid ward.

[coffeeandgym]

See, I'm having a casual fling with a guy who's great conversation. I like him. I'm attracted to him. If I'm brutally honest, he is simply too old for me to fall in love with. Our age gap is such that a) he's not great looking, and I'm attracted to him in spite of, not because of, his body - which is a bit sad for a long term relationship; and more importantly b) we're simply at different points in our lives and not compatible.

I like him and I like spending time with him - but I don't want to commit to him.

[coffeeandgym]

And the main reason I don't want to commit is because I want the kind of extremely intense attraction I've felt for others and know I won't feel for him, because a) 40 years old and b) dad bod

[ADFSDF1996]

You’re an exception, most women don’t care about looks.

How often do women ogle shirtless fit guys at the beach? How often do women check out random men based on their looks? How often do women make the first move on men they are interested in? How often do you see scantly clad men in advertisements? The answer to these questions is almost never.

Dennis Praeger explains it perfectly.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=A9WZFeA4FzI

[coffeeandgym]

I hate to break it to you, but we 'appreciate' fit shirtless guys at the beach all the time.

It's true we make the first move less, but I reckon thats more fear of rejection, and the social idea that a guy being rejected by a woman is normal, but vice versa is embarrassing. Trust me, we (I, my friends, my sister, my mother) notice hot men with good bodies. Looks are not everything, but they are huge part of attraction for us.

If my last boyfriend had not been muscular and broad-shouldered, I wouldn't have taken the time to discover his sweet personality. And if I wasn't toned, he wouldn't have stopped to talk to me.

Dennis Praeger's explanation is largely wishful thinking. It's easier for some guys to kid themselves that we don't care about looks than it is to accept the truth.

[ADFSDF1996]

@coffeeandgym There’s always exceptions to a rule. But even then, I doubt you experience sexual arousal just by looking at a shirtless man at the beach. Yes women can appreciate a good looking men ilike appreciating art. But looks alone are not enough to arouse most women.

Believe it or not, I actually wish women cared about looks and I use to ask all sorts of questions on here regarding women’s visual nature but now I accept that women are not as visual as men because it’s biology.

[coffeeandgym]

The last guy I slept with has a bit of a dad bod - and I slept with him in spite of it, not because of it. He's smart and funny and we hit it off immediately.

My last actual boyfriend had (and still has) a great body, but that wasn't enough to make it work. He was lovely, we just had poor chemistry.

Looks aren't everything - but they matter. And if I'm honest, I probably wouldn't settle down with the dad bod guy (mostly because we've a significant age gap and while that's no issue with a casual fling, it is an issue with a serious relationship).

[bamesjond0069]

Really? I find a significant age gap to make relationships much better. I typically date girls around 20. The gap puts us both thinking about marriage and children in the next 2 years, perfect alignment. Girls closer to my age typically don't seem to want anything I want in life so every time I try it's not even close.

[coffeeandgym]

@bamesjond0069 I don't want children for at least three more years - and when I do, I'll want the dad to be under 40 (preferably under 35 - though not as serious as maternal age, the link between advancing paternal age and a multitude of hereditary conditions is now common knowledge within the medical community).

[bamesjond0069]

Ah yeah. I'm not really looking to wait much. Strangely younger women are usually ready to go with starting a family and older ones want to wait. Seems completely backwards but thats how it is.

[zed-789]

I like me some dad bod. Not like a full on beer belly or fat just some pudge and a dash of chubby with a sprinkling of lame. Give a girl a little something to slightly grind her clit against when she’s ridding on top!

[hellionthesagereborn]

Who the hell has ever argued against this? Obviously you would prefer not to have the dad bod, guys are not the ones going around saying how its sexy so why the hell are you going after guys for this? I mean don't get me wrong, what the hell makes you think you deserve a guy who is ripped and also caring etc? I mean the overwhelming majority of guys are going to want a certain type of woman, so we are the ones saying that you would prefer the guy with a six pack then the guy with some flab, but we also do the exact thing for women. Your not the greatest looking woman in the world, I can guarantee that you need a lot of work (most people do) but most men are willing to let that go because of personality and everything else. Why act like this is something guys are pushing on you when its not? Why act like we don't know what its like to feel pressure to look a certain way when your LITERALLY trying to make us feel pressure to look a certain way? What was the point of this? Here, lets sum it up, "Women prefer attractive men", well no shit.

[gym4ever]

no shit that girl like fit dudes. Like who the fuck like fat unhealthy dude? No one.
a lot dudes prefer those fitness hoes that are fit, some dudes just want flat belly. Same goes for girls, they prefer those fitness fuckboys and some prefer just dudes that are not fat. Also take in mind that most of girls prefer dude that is physically stronger that her so it would mean dude has to have little bit of muscle, so my guess is women like average gym bro who train just to keep his body in shape.
Its not rocket science to realize 2+2 is 4 lol

[gym4ever]

what the fuck is wrong with this website, i wrote "physically stronger THAN her"
and it changed to "that her" somehow.

[naijagurl]

I think many people would agree with what you’re saying. Some women do genuinely find dad bods attractive but a lot of the time when women say that they prefer them, they mean that they prefer them over the overly jacked, bulging sculpted muscle type of body, not moderate muscles like the pictures you added.

[BirdFan360]

Guys get dad bods when their married because when their wife cooks for them, he'd damn well finish the whole plate. All his time is taken by work family and (to a lesser extent) friends, so no time to work out anymore, and that all adds up. My dad says that getting married makes a man 'prosperous' in relation to weight. You can't leave any food on the plate or it's like an insult to your wife's hard work. You must finish everything.

One Thanksgiving feast is all it takes...

[Felinegirl]

I want a guy at a healthy weight. Too fat guys are less attractive to me, but too big bodybuilders are as well. I don't care about ripped-ness.

[Anonymous]

Well stated, albeit it should be obvious to everyone.

[luvstoned4him]

Am I the only girl here who is attracted to dad bods?

[AnimeThot]

Yeah you are

[luvstoned4him]

@AnimeThot wow

[S_Rose]

Attractive for me is personality. A confident guy <3. Ya there are physically looking hot guys, but I would be scared to date them because they would make me feel ugly. lol. I prefer normal looking guys with a great personality :)

[Dummy327]

I don't get the whole dad bod thing but I have heard some women like it better. I don't understand but whatever. I think girls don't put quite as much stock in the looks as guys do

[Levin]

You know, it's funny. That's pretty much identical to what my body looks like, girl. The swimmer chap I mean.

[Anonymous]

There’s a big difference between “dad bods will do, we have fun and eat nachos and fuck and get along so it’s allll goood.”

and

“I prefer dad bods aesthetically”

Duh.

[Isten]

Thank you for this! Like it's the most obvious thing yet many miss the point.

[emmily2396]

But some girls' dads can look like the right picture lol

[StickStickity13]

Exactly, we don't like mom bods either. Cellulite, sagging boobs, untoned stomach, weird proportions, unclear skin. That would be fucked up if guys wanted that stuff.

[ILoveAnime]

You're right except for cellulite. That's a gender thing like boobs. Every woman has it which is normal.

[StickStickity13]

@ILoveAnime but some women it's extremely small amounts. We don't want to notice it.

[ILoveAnime]

That's true. And that I agree. But the way you stated before made it seem like even a little bit is bad.

[Anonymous]

[Opinion Owner]

[Guanfei]

But when guys say they don't want fat girls, immediately it's body shaming and sexism.

[Anonymous]

I take offense to people calling fat guys "Dad Bods."
I happen to be a dad and I'm not fat.
Right now.

[WhoDatGuy]

Too many average people want attractive partners. Unless your the top 1% don't expect it back

[FakeName123]

I didn't realise until now that Chris Pratt has Macklemore Nipples

[Anonymous]

Personally, I don't like dad bods or defined abs. A tiny bit of definition is okay, but I find leaner/slim guys to be the most attractive.