This is a very short thought, more than a proper myTake.
It's a little fact I'm coming to terms now, and that many single or lonely people will probably get angry at me for stating out loud.
Being in a relationship won't save or fix your life of failures and setbacks.
Today, due to the Coronavirus scare in my area, corporate decided to "close indefinitely" and perhaps "relocate" my office. This is a death sentence for my career.
This is the perhaps the hardest blow of them all. It's over, I'm finished.
I've lost my job, I've lost the only thing that still mattered something.
I told this to my fiancée, but she doesn't understand. She said this can be an occasion to spend time together, but I don't see it as such. I just see it as the disgregation of everything I have built. All she's doing is getting all happy and delighted about this and spout crap about how "we'll weather this down together" and that "the sky will not always be gray".
Bullcrap. It's easy for her to talk since everything is going well for her and she always reaches her goals and gets what she wants.
I'm practically a finished man, a dead man. She's older than me, yet she looks much more younger and lively than me, while I'm already an old, wrinkled walking corpse.
I don't know, maybe that's what she likes so much about me and my failures, maybe she's really a corpsef*cker just like her favorite movie.
Maybe she's happy everytime I fail and trip down, so she can step in playing nurse and take care of me like she seems to like so much saying or doing.
At this point I'd not be surprised if she tripped me on the stairs to make me fall and break my arm so she could take care of it.
But enough of my rant.
Maybe I'm just emotionally charged, disappointed and pained and I'm taking it out that way as a way to let out my frustrations because IRL I'm always quiet and don't talk much.
I'm just sick and tired and weary of everything.
Anyhow, the message beyond the rambling is this.
A relationship won't fix your life if it's falling apart. It could even make it worse.
Don't put your life in anyone else's hands, no matter how much reassuring they are. It's your only and exclusive care and responsability.
Every time I did it, it only got worse.
Thank you for reading.