Rebound relationships, disgusting.

[Anonymous]

I find the idea of a rebound relationship to be completely disgusting and stupid. The idea you enter a relationship solely to forget another is destructive and wrong. These are not responsible or sensible principles to start a relationship on and you are only using the other person. YOU SHOULD NEVER start a relationship you expect to fail or as a method of revenge/to prop yourself up. If your relationship failed consider what decisions you made (in person or action) that led to that failure. When you've addressed your issues then seek a new relationship. Don't expect relationships to succeed or fail, just focus on development. If the relationship blossoms grow it to marriage, if not move on. The idea that you should start a relationship you plan to go nowhere is utterly disgusting and dangerous.

[Romi93]

Agree 100%. I just broke up with a guy I had been dating for a while, where I probably was his rebound.
When I met him he told me he had been in a "toxic" relationship 6 months prior. I thought that was enough time to get over someone you were in a relationship for 8 months, so I saw no problem. However, he had a lot of issues he had not resolved.
We dated for almost a year and he brought up his ex countless time, compared me to her when I tried to talk about commitment and exclusivity, he had a big issue with being exclusive or put a formal tittle to our relationship even though we saw each other 5 times a week and spend every weekend together.
We ended it because a lot of time passed and I thought he would change his mind, he would want to be serious but he didn't.
After we stopped seeing each other I realized that I was definitely his rebound. And it sucks. I would personally never do that.
*I think you need to work on yourself before starting something with someone after you have been in a relationship.
*I think its awful that you know you are emotionally unavailable yet you start something anyways, hurting people in the process. (The other person should see the red flags, but some people are not honest from the start. In my case specifically he wasn't honest from the start, he acted like he wanted something serious and after 3/4 months were I already was super invested he told me he didn't want exclusivity)
*Lastly, using someone to get over someone else it's stupid. Because you are just covering your pain with someone. You are hurting the other person, you are not working through your pain and if the person disappears the pain is still there, you haven't work through that and the only thing you have accomplished is causing more pain.

[myTake Owner]

Sorry, to hear you've experienced this. I literally saw a woman complain that she got married to man for ten years who she said, "was supposed to be a rebound". No one gets married for ten years like that. That is such a ludicrous idea and unfortunately it's reached the common vernacular.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

You're right. It's disgusting.

Scary photo looks so real.

[TremorJay]

Lol, I imagine most people don't know they're rebounding until the relationship is in full form. Now, if someone is actively seeking a rebound, yeah that's pretty dumb, and not kind at all to the person who's time is then wasted.

[myTake Owner]

I've seen people start relationships like this and they expected them to be short lived. That's pretty scummy.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

I don't believe that most people who are rebounding are really aware of it, or have no intentions of it being that kind of a relationship.

[myTake Owner]

I've met people that intentionally entered one and expecting it to fail. That's wrong.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

I enter every relationship expecting it to fail. That's not rebounding, that's objective reality in my point of view :)

[myTake Owner]

That's not a point of growth. Also, using someone to prop yourself up to date the intentional person is wrong. You are right to not expect success in a relationship, but intentional failure is wrong.

[BeenThereLovedIt]

I think we have to agree to disagree

[Anonymous]

Not many will agree with you because most people realise that a relationship can be fun and enjoyable to both parties even when you don't intend it to be "the one".

[VanillaSalt]

Agree

[Browneye57]

Gee, so much alarm-ism and drama. Are you sure you're not a girl? LOL

[myTake Owner]

I saw some person on the bus complain about a failed marriage they had. They were married for ten years and apparently had a child together. This woman was angry about it, saying it was supposed to be a rebound relationship. No one gets married for ten years on a rebound. That is a disgusting concept. Obviously she was lying to herself. No one can be that disgusting to be married ten years on a fake relationship.

[Browneye57]

I reject the whole term and concept of 'rebound' anything. You end a relationship with one, you start one with another.
I was married for ten years. I moved out of the estate mansion we had just built, into an 800sq ft apartment with my new girlfriend and her roommate. They said it would never work. The ex was more upset about losing your fancy big house than her husband. She never gave two shits about me. As long as I was her plow-horse everything was peachy. Except she was never home, and when she was she was stoned out on the sofa. And she thought cooking cleaning and fucking were three cities in China.

That was thirty years ago, still married to the new wife. The divorce cost me right about a half-million. People ask why divorce is so costly, it's BECAUSE IT'S WORTH IT.

[myTake Owner]

Rough deal man. I totally believe in starting good relationships, but starting something you expect to fail is wrong. I'm glad you got free of that. I avoid drug users, there's always baggage.

[mindNsoul]

That's true

[White_Widow]

Agreed