The Problem with Weak Men in a Relationship

[WowwGirl]

Weak Men

Hello Gaggers,

Hope all are doing well who read this. I hope I hope you love this Mytake. Let's try and remember this isn't a personal attack to you so, don't be catty if possible. It's a simple Mytake.

#wowgirlRocks

The Problem with Weak Men in a Relationship

If a female wanted someone feminine she could easily date a equal to herself that's called being a lesbian or a bisexual.

Not Realistic

No straight female wants to date a guy that's not stronger in some way or anouther more so than herself. She doesn't want to Support him, Protect him, Provide for him, Clean up After Him , Cook for him, and do Everything in the Relationship.

Not Masculine

Masculinity is needed to have a working relationship. A car can not have two drivers it's the same thing in a relationship. Someone must have masculine traits and be a leader, to successfully drive the car/relationship down the road of life, without it crashing.

Not Equal

If we are all equal guys you would have a vagina. Just because you act like a vagina doesn't mean you have one. Let's try to remember that.

Thanks for reading.

#WowgirlRocks

[talulahbee]

Sorry to be blunt here but this is such an ugly take... The whole idea of alpha and beta and weak and strong men is just wrong and seems to fit a very small minority of men and women. Tbh this sounds like something you'd find from a really bad dating coach who preys on insecurities of single guys and it's a really toxic take on men and masculinity. Men and their personalities, like women, come in all shapes and forms and all have value, what you're into is what you're into.

By all means you're entitled to your opinion, power to you, but it comes across as very small minded. If you're into "masculine" men go off, but there is no need to pigeon hole everyone else into your categorisation.

Sensitive guys are great. Feminine guys are great. Athletic guys are great. Nerdy guys are great. Diversity is great. Think of all the different types of men you know, they can all find love. Actors, athletes, boxers, painters, photographers, dancers, stylists, therapists, IT support, builders.

So guys reading this, don't feel like you need to change who you are inside to fit the needs of finding a date, we are all different and have different needs and wants and if you come from a good place of respect and genuine care you will find someone who values you for you. Period.

[Levin]

Brilliant wisdom and shows that age is just a number.

Usually takes like this should be an indication of the asker's own mental constraints. If one was as strong as professed, one would do some digging and turn the reflection in on oneself.

[talulahbee]

Lol gag changes all my letters and acronyms into the full words so I sound smarter than I am 😂😂 but thank u. And yea I agree it seems so small minded. Tho people don't like looking at themselves, I only got ok with it from a lot of counselling tbh.

[Levin]

Yup, plus no one can hear your Aussie accent, so that always helps :P

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

Yeah, alpha and beta males don’t exist in humans. We aren’t wolves. So sad to see that term has taken a life of its own.

[UncleBertie]

@Levin You're just an envious too-n-from (loud raspberry) because our country is better than yours, with a high standard of living, real beaches, warm water, great surfing, a sunny climate, the best wine and beer, low crime, and friendly people who speak with an odd yet pleasant-sounding accent (according to many visitors, despite them struggling to understand what we say).

[UncleBertie]

That alpha-beta, strong-weak definition of masculinity is a distinctly North American, socio-cultural construct with little meaning or application outside of that region. Regrettably for Americans, this dichotomous and false narrative has become a closely held belief among men and women. From a young age, boys and men are obliged to openly demonstrate so-called alpha traits, such as social confidence, high-level abilities, physical strength, mental and emotional resilience, a lack of empathy, dominance over others, and sexually predacious behaviours. In psychiatry, these traits form the classical definition of the narcissistic personality disorder - NPD. Women seek men with these traits, and then wonder why so many of them are bad-boy jerks who cheat, lie and won't commit. The alpha-beta dichotomy is simplistic in the extreme. It cannot accommodate the enormous diversity among individuals and the complexity of the human psyche - the infinite shades of grey that make up an individual's personality. Every man is the sum total of his strengths and weaknesses. This goes a long way to explaining the evolutionary success of our species. Homo sapien evolved as a social animal. Each member of a society depended on others. One man's strength compensated for another man's weakness. The alpha-beta myth guarantees that a boy-man will develop a "false self" and live a life of delusion, in mortal fear of failure, hiding behind a mask that betrays his real self. The result - higher rates of mental and physical health problems, suicide, early death...

[Vickymoore9]

I’m not sure what the reference of weak your ask exactly here because their are many forms of weak! A man can be physically a brutal force that dominates most any man in front of him. That same man can be so insecure most of the dominance is from insecurities. I hate a guy who needs constantly be told
how much I love him how good he looks. I hate a guy who goes crazy when another man walks into a room and looks at me. These weaknesses and of emotional insecurity and exhausting ( I have learned exactly how to read these kinds of guys out ) never never again will I date this kind of weak guy I can’t even call them a man sorry 😐

[Levin]

You make a good point. A lot of 'strong' men are emotionally insecure. A lot of guys in the army are like that. What makes all these kind of mytakes nonsensical is reality is a lot more complicated than any kind of easy categorisation, even if the categorisations do hold an element of truth.

[Vickymoore9]

@Levin exactly there are so many layers in what society outlines and the facts of life how it functions in reality. I laugh at the shallow ignorance the puppets let themselves be lead through life.

[classic_crime]

First off... Body parts have nothing to do with masculinity. their only purpose is to procreate.

But I disagree that you can't have a strong woman and a strong man together in a relationship. Sure they will but heads but that's simply how their dinamic works. Some couples prefer to have someone challenging them.

I know some women who make great relationship leaders and some men who are fantastic supporters. Not all men are created the same so to put all of in the same box is like grading a monkey and a goldfish on their ability to climb a tree. It's just not how that works.

I do however understand that this is your opinion and I respect it. If this is the type of guy you want to be with then that is perfectly fine :) but please don't put all of us in the same hole. We are not all square pegs.

[bamesjond0069]

Are you a woman or a gay?

[classic_crime]

Nope. I just don't like people who says everyone has to be the same. If I wanna be a fucking poodle ima be a damn poodle

[bamesjond0069]

No. You definitely can't be a poodle.

[classic_crime]

Watch me

[WowwGirl]

@bamesjond0069 😂😂😂

[bamesjond0069]

@WowwGirl we shouldn't be laughing at mental disorders. But its hard not to when they are so fucking hilarious! Lol.

[classic_crime]

XD Im glad I can be entertaining

[WowwGirl]

Poodles are gay

[classic_crime]

Really now? What else didn't I know about poodles?

[loves2learn]

Wow. That escalated quickly.

Ima have to agree with @classic_crime on this one. Equal partnerships are where it’s at. 20 years happy life, to parents that BOTH lovingly care for the kids and support EACH OTHER.

[loves2learn]

*two, not to 😒

[WowwGirl]

@loves2learn wowgirl actually

[loves2learn]

Oh, @wowgirl. Why thank you. Life is good. 😁

[TomGarand]

Speaking as someone whose friend's sister is crushing on, and is taller, stronger, and more dominant than me, I gotta respectfully disagree with you. Also, she's as straight as an arrow.

Women naturally do not want men that are weaker, smaller, or more submissive than they are. But there are exceptions. Still don't believe me? There is also a whole-ass subreddit of people who like role reversal in relationships, and some of these people are actually IN those relationships.

https://www.reddit.com/r/RoleReversal/

[WowwGirl]

Fair enough 🙂

[TomGarand]

And as for the "Equal" thing, I assume you mean interchangeable. As I said above, we're not. But we are equal in value. I don't think men are better than women in general, or that women are better than men. I'm not a religious extremist or feminist.

Men and women are equal in value, but not in function.

Also, I don't understand the whole, "If I wanted a feminine/masculine person, I would just be gay or lesbian." If you were gay, you would like someone because they were the same gender as you, not because they have that gender's traits.

[zeitgeist057]

Yeah, I had a female friend who I noticed she always tended towards more feminine and submissive men. She's just more comfortable in a dominant role for some reason. I even hooked up with her at one point and we are good friends, but I could never be in a relationship with her because we want different energy from our partners.

I was thinking not all women, but some might be more comfortable with a more submissive man if they've had traumatic experiences with more aggressive men.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

A car can't have two drivers at the same time, but you can take turns who's at the wheel... On a long trip, does one person drive 🤔 usually you split the driving when the first driver gets tired, otherwise you chance them falling asleep at the wheel...

[loves2learn]

So very true, @Brainsbeforebeauty, taking turns is the key.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@loves2learn week yeah cuz it's ultimately still doing it together... Tire both putting in to get to that final destination

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

*you're not tire 🙄🤦🏼‍♀️

[razelove]

Heh, short, sweet, and to the point. Just like me in bed *cries uncontrollably* I need my therapy dog Chippers! lol

[Lliam]

LOL. I value the idea of ladies and gentlemen. I really enjoy it when women loo and act like girly girls. It's fun to play the game of opening doors for my lady and treating her like a precious flower even though she is perfectly capable of taking care of herself. It's nice when she slips her arm through mine and presses close when we are walking, as if she looks up to me as her protector.

Funny story. On our first date, we were standing by her car chatting in the parking lot of a restaurant before we parted. When we went to leave, we found that an employee had locked the gate of the parking lot. I hopped over the 6' cinder block wall and went to get someone to unlock the gate. I didn't think it was a big deal. But, from then on, when my wife repeated the events to her friends, she made it sound like I leaped over that wall like Superman.
Another time, we were riding in the back seat of her friends' car going somewhere. The lady in the front seat said something (I don't remember what it was), and my (future) wife spontaneously blurted "Oh, [Liam] can do ANYTHING!" Both people turned to look at her and then at each other as if to silently say "Yep, she's in love."
Anyway, it's really nice to be trusted and admired that way. And she loves being adored.

I love being a man in bed. And most women enjoy it when a man takes charge during sex. They are attracted to the masculine gender that is larger and stronger. Women get off on being the fuckee and being used for their man's pleasure.

Aside from those things, neither of us dominant when it comes to making decisions or taking care of the house. In that regard, we don't have gender roles. Nobody is the boss. We respect each other's intellect and abilities.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Ok so there a some logistical problems with your argument.

Lets start with this: "If a female wanted someone feminine she could easily date a equal to herself that's called being a lesbian or a bisexual"

So the logic flaw here is that you are assuming that:
1. All women want strong men (which is false, for example dominant women, or women who go for cute guys rather than handsome guys, or women who like fat weak guys, or women who just don't care sbout looks).
2. that strength has anything to do with getting aroused by a penis (which is also false).

And 3. that being physically strong is less feminine and more masculine (maybe body building is, but body building is actually pretty bad for weight lifting/strength building because you lose the fat cushion and you dry out the skin and blood, making injury from lifting/moving heavy things a much higher risk, so strong man competitions typically don't have musclebound looking men in them, more "bear"/"dadbod" looking men, and plenty of women are shaped like that.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Now onto point number two.

"No straight female wants to date a guy that's not stronger in some way or anouther more so than herself. She doesn't want to Support him, Protect him, Provide for him, Clean up After Him , Cook for him, and do Everything in the Relationship"

1. Many women do want to do all of that stuff, they enjoy being the homebody, it's one of the reasons why most mothers don't abandon their children.

2. All of that is mutually exclusive to being stronger, basic household chores and the average job don't really involve strength, also if they did, and you were correct about gender strength gaps, then it would folllow that the housewife stereotype would not have existed.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Now on to point 3.

"Masculinity is needed to have a working relationship. A car can not have two drivers it's the same thing in a relationship. Someone must have masculine traits and be a leader, to successfully drive the car/relationship down the road of life, without it crashing."

1. Masculinity and strength are not the same thing.

2. some women like pretty looking dudes.

3. A relationship is nothing like driving a car, one person cannot take the wheel and be in charge if the other, it's an equal footing situation, with no boss, or it will fail. thinking otherwise is a sign that you don't want to be an adult and are looking fir a surrogate father instead of a boyfriend/husband.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Lastly

"If we are all equal guys you would have a vagina. Just because you act like a vagina doesn't mean you have one. Let's try to remember that"

1. You can't act like you have a vagina unless you are taking it up the ass. Because thats as close to that kind of hole that a strait biological male is every going to have.

There is no male or female way of thinking or acting.

[TheSpaceGnome]

ever*

[Nalix]

I think there is an important difference between weak men and submissive men. Of course, a man can be both, and that's not good. Everyone needs to bring something to a relationship, and all too often women ask a man to be strong just to cover for their own lack of agency and talent.

Women and men want partners who are interesting and capable. It's true that someone needs to lead a relationship, but if men are to lead, women must give men a reason to want to lead. If the man is to be the head, the woman must be the heart.

Even the strongest man needs time to relax. Women frequently lead relationships from behind their man, letting him take all the risks and then give her the rewards when he succeeds, but she avoids the responsibility when he fails.

So even dominant women don't like having weak men, for the same reasons that dominant men don't like having weak women. Be useful, be interesting, whether you lead in a relationship or not. A woman may enjoy taking control of a man in bed, but at the end of the day, she still wants him to shine and protect her, to make her feel protected.

[NetSapien]

I'll be the odd one here..

I understand what you're saying, and I'm inclined to agree on some points.

Although, I disagree with your perspective under "Not Realistic". Personally, I would want someone to "Support me, Protect me, Provide for me, Clean up After me , Cook for me..", etc as much as I would do for that person. Otherwise, it's perfectly justifiable to see a prostitute every few days. I'm sure she wouldn't want to "Support him, Protect him, Provide for him, Clean up After Him , Cook for him, and do Everything in the Relationship".

[Ace_Chidorigafuchi]

Love is about infatuation with the superficialities of a person, is their body compatible, their personality, their mind, what do they find funny? - then if it's reciprocal , having a conversation about the deeper things and over the months being brutally honest with yourself do they match up? Then outwardly considering the limitations - your limited time, energy, resources - do they deserve me? If so, then be exclusive.

Otherwise, don't ask, don't tell. Let the relationship ride out as it will, certainly don't burn a bridge with the person. But don't hold yourself and your time hostage for a stranger.

[legalboxers]

I really dont know what your smoking, they are some men who know something which some of you dont want to do. Its called COMPROMISE.. Meet in the middle. (And the song I hate the most)

https://www.youtube.com/embed/xQzS3JnZQZM

Some of us, like myself. I hate conflict. So I say yeah whatever do whatever the fuck you want to.

[WowwGirl]

Difference makes the world go round

[legalboxers]

@WowwGirl as you say ma'am

[WowwGirl]

Thank you sir

[joshctlee]

This post seems contradictory to me because this sounds like something a weak woman would say.


Masculinity? Define masculinity, please because I’ve know plenty of tough masculine guys who are the biggest man babies in the world. Short fuses, disrespectful, and can’t hold a job to support themselves.


That being said men dislike weak woman just as much as woman dislike weak men.


I dated a single mom who worked for 9.00 an hour still living with her parents at the age of 35.


She only dated me so I would pay for everything like food, her car payment and her kids birthday party.


That to me is a weak ass woman. I ain’t no ATM machine.


Both partners need to be respectful, honest, loyal, responsible, and achieve together.

[joshctlee]

Another thing, to say men need to be a certain way in order for a relationship to work is ignorant as fuck

[Jjpayne]

I do believe that protection is a good responsibility for men to have because of the nature shape of their bodies. But I think, desire in relationships takes on many beautiful forms. A blind man can fall in love with a seeing woman. They can be together in a dependent relationship that only exists because love does not have boundaries. Love does amazing and unpredictable things above what we can imagine.

[JPrez]

Great take. I know exactly what you’re saying and totally agree. At the end of the day, men need women and women need men in a relationship. We need your feminine qualities for certain aspects and you need our masculinity. Both of those have to be strong for each side. I could list those things but I think you know where I’m headed with this and I would get blasted by certain groups if I list those things.

[ChiTown33]

I can totally understand this post. The only problem i see with it is it's written by a woman who's still in the grand scheme still really young. And i'm just guessing hasn't had very long relationships. And by that i mean spanning a decade or more. As people get older expectations/demands get more relaxed.
You have to understand there is the otherside as well. A woman can demand all she wants. But she has bring something to the table as well.

[bannacookies]

I guess the same way goes with girls with muscle or get into fights. That's not a "feminine" thing.

[WowwGirl]

Nope androgynous

[bannacookies]

Ah, never heard much about that word. I looked it up and learned something new. Thanks.

[WowwGirl]

Sure

[misanthropistkev]

Well stuff like that begins in the home a boy needs to if not be around his father be around men a lot of males grow up without dads

There are some good moms out there but even so they still just a mom boys need they’re dads to teach them to be strong men and how to deal with women properly

Its sad really

[Irondrago]

Incoming a bunch of angry limp wristed pussy beggars. These faggots who will disagree with you always end up being a doormat for the whores guys like you and I dump a load in. Then they end up taking care of our bastard crotch goblins thinking its theirs LOL

[BlacklightShade]

Your "car" analogy makes it seem like you're saying the woman in a relationship should just shut up and take whatever her man dishes out. I'm sure that's not what you're saying, right?

[ohshee]

Well I have a big smile on my face and I really don't want to say anything except for that was great that was really good and the funny part about it are the best part about it it's so true good job

[standardguy]

Well, that was sort of offensive.
You mixed up a traditional role model with feminist thoughts.
And the result is that neither a feminist (softy man) can fulfill your wishes
nor a macho man.

[Daniel_Dano]

Good mytake , I agree the more feminine a woman is the more she will like masculine men.

[Feelicks]

Sounds like you just want your pick of the litter, but are you really the cream of the crop yourself?

[TheSpaceGnome]

From the sound of it she isn't since she basically wants a guy to be her dad but with sex privs, it's honestly pretty creepy.