The transforming journey from being single to being in a relationship

The transforming journey from being single to being in a relationship

“No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main” John Donne

as much as some of us like to think that we can live as lone wolves, we can’t block or avoid interactions with other humans. Wither in the work space, the activities we do, or any other part of our lives.

Therefor we eventually find ourselves prone to interacting with other humans and even end up forming relationships with them.
These relationships come in the form of a friendship, partnership or an intimate one. And while the first two are the easiest and less challenging, the last one is the game changer and the most challenging one, and it’s effects on our personal lives are more “drastic”. It can define, change and affect your individual life style, decision making and future.

We all have our own lifestyle qualities, taste and properties. Some are primary for us and others are secondary.
Career, personality, wealth, public image, ambitions and activities.
The ones we choose to focus on are bound to the level of joy we experience in.
Some focus on their career, others on their personalities. Some invest in their wealth and public image or follow their ambitions and practice the activities they enjoy and gives meaning to their lives.
Sometimes they are forced upon you depending on the social status or the environment you’ve been born into or live in. yet no one is obliged to be stuck in their boundaries, and can always reject them or learn how to maneuver around them. What you do and the choices you make, which define your lifestyle are your own to determine as an individual.

Being in a relationship is a whole different story, cause when you invite someone to your life, they come barring their own lifestyle. And the coexistence or merging of both of your lifestyles is determined by the status of that relationship and the level of individuality of both of you. And both of you find themselves prone to certain compromises, wither in the form of sharing, defending your individuality or quitting certain parts on the basis of mutual understanding.

Relationships are usually formed on the basis of:
Mental connection, physical connection, appearance attraction, emotional bonding, and beneficial gains.
The presence of three, plays a major role in shaping the status of your relationship and fuels your ability to compromise.
Yet the richer your individual lifestyle is, the harder the compromising gets. And the less you have going on in your life, the easier you find yourself jumping in a relationship and investing in it.

For example being wealthy with a certain social status in your community, might make you less adventurous and force you to maintain a certain public image and do specific activities and shape your personality to match. Therefor, while you might be secretly escaping the lights by being with a wild one in the darkness of your room, yet never risk taking that one out with you into the light, fearing their influence on your lifestyle and adding more complications to what you already are experiencing, making the compromising almost impossible. Unless that one is on a high level of tolerance and understanding that they can work with you to maintain both in a safe frame for both of you.

On the other hand, having a less complicated life, like being a standard person, living a simple life away from the spot light, might make being in a relationship much easier, and the compromising becomes elastic. For example, you can share the activities you do with them, quit some and keep others to yourself. You can work on changing some parts of your personality, and maybe shape your career and ambitions to involve them in it.

With all that been said, we can agree that no relationship is like any other, therefor your judgement of your relationship shouldn’t be based on the comparisons you make with other relationships, nor there should be a mainstream “stereotype” for relationships. Every story is different and has two sides, and honesty, team spirit, and communicating from the beginning are the best way to turn a relationship into a constructive healthy one instead of a toxic destructive fueled by the conflict between both of your individualities in decision making and expectations you set for each other to refrain yourself from compromising.

The transforming journey from being single to being in a relationship
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