"Ghosting" A Person Can Cause Harm

[Hawkes_Lady]

"Ghosting" refers to the sudden and unexplained withdrawal or disappearance of one person from another's life, typically in the context of a relationship or friendship. This behavior can have significant negative effects on individuals, especially those with abandonment issues, a fear of rejection, or low self-esteem. Here's how ghosting can cause harm in such situations:

1. **Intensification of Abandonment Issues:** For someone with abandonment issues, ghosting reinforces their fear of being abandoned. The sudden and unexplained disappearance can trigger intense emotions, including feelings of abandonment and betrayal.

2. **Increased Fear of Rejection:** Ghosting can heighten a person's fear of rejection. The lack of closure and understanding about why the person disappeared may lead to self-doubt and internalization of blame, making the individual more afraid of future rejections.

3. **Negative Impact on Self-Esteem:** Individuals who experience ghosting may internalize the rejection, believing they are somehow unworthy or unlovable. This negative impact on self-esteem can be particularly damaging for someone who already struggles with low self-worth.

4. **Self-Blame and Guilt:** People with abandonment issues may be prone to blaming themselves for the ghosting, even when the reasons are unrelated to their actions. This self-blame can lead to guilt, shame, and a distorted perception of personal responsibility.

5. **Impaired Trust in Relationships:** Ghosting can erode trust in interpersonal relationships. The individual may become hesitant to invest emotionally in future connections, fearing they will be abandoned again without warning.

6. **Difficulty Moving On:** The lack of closure in a ghosting situation can make it challenging for individuals to move on. Unanswered questions and lingering uncertainty about the reasons behind the disappearance can hinder the healing process.

7. **Impact on Mental Health:** Ghosting can contribute to anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues, especially for those already vulnerable due to abandonment issues. The emotional toll may require professional support to cope and recover.

It's crucial to recognize that ghosting is a form of emotional abandonment, and its effects can be profound.

Ending a friendship or any other relationship is a part of life, and how it is handled can significantly impact both parties involved. Choosing to end a relationship with kindness, honesty, and respect can contribute to a healthier emotional environment. Here are some principles to keep in mind when concluding a relationship:

1. **Communication:** Be open and honest about your feelings and reasons for ending the relationship. Clear communication provides the other person with understanding and closure.

2. **Choose the Right Time and Place:** Pick an appropriate time and private setting to have the conversation. Avoid doing it in public or during emotionally charged situations.

3. **Express Your Feelings Tactfully:** Share your feelings in a considerate and empathetic manner. Use "I" statements to express your perspective without blaming or accusing the other person.

4. **Listen and Acknowledge:** Allow the other person to express their feelings and reactions. Be attentive and acknowledge their perspective, even if you may not agree.

5. **Avoid Ghosting:** Ghosting can be hurtful and damaging. A respectful and honorable approach involves addressing the situation directly rather than disappearing without explanation.

6. **Offer Closure:** If possible, provide some level of closure by answering questions or providing insights into the decision. This can help the other person process the end of the relationship.

7. **Maintain Respect:** Treat the other person with respect throughout the conversation. Avoid unnecessary criticism or harsh language that may escalate tensions.

8. **Be Firm, but Compassionate:** While it's important to be clear about your decision, express your thoughts with compassion. Acknowledge the positive aspects of the relationship and the other person's qualities.

9. **Consider the Other Person's Well-being:** Recognize that the end of the relationship may be difficult for the other person. Be mindful of their emotions and well-being during and after the conversation.

By approaching the conclusion of a relationship in a considerate and respectful manner, you contribute to fostering a culture of empathy and understanding. This can lead to healthier breakups, with both individuals able to move forward with a sense of closure and personal growth.

[myloveforuisinfinte]

I can understand u, You are 💯 correct. But the problem is not everyone is like u some people loves to being manipulative. They love it by leaving people hanging over a text. They do intentionally. They never make things clear coz it gives them another kind of enjoyment.
It's better u to be not to be sad and be mentally strong , be ignorant and move on and show them that u don't a shit about their existence.(if they ever come, completely ignore them , if they don't come it's great), our life shouldn't be stop coz of some dumb shit. Instead ful fill your life with good things. Your life is in your control , not anyone's control, so take the lead and be responsible for it.
Choose people who actually care , and love u and respect your time and efforts, instead of wasting on time on those people who don't deserve it.
Some shitty people ghost u , it's normal. U should be thankful to God that these kind of shits are not present anymore in your life. U deserve better, that's why God removed them from your life.
Choose good things , not stale things.

[Gopnik]

modern dating apps suck because of ghosting and people talking to multiple people at once without disclosing it, don't make someone feel special when they're not, i've had several conversations that i thought went pretty well but none of them lead anywhere and ended in me getting ghosted.

[YoureStillASlob]

Oh yeah you're innocent.! Lets be honest people like you deserve it. Nasty little "personality" youve got there crusty cunt

[Roudyrebel8]

Ghosting is very rude in most cases

[ObscuredBeyond]

It is horrible. But it beats the alternative: you outlive your usefulness, and she spreads insane rumors behind your back to get rid of you. And then ghosts you on top of it. So no sooner do you figure out that you've been ghosted, then you have some crazy witch hunt to deal with as well. And no matter who you turn to for help, you risk facing gaslighting, because the world cannot accept that you did nothing wrong.

"You're the dude! Therefore, it HAS to be your fault somehow that she did all this! There's no possible way she did all this for no reason!"

"Apparently, I outlived my usefulness."

"Nah, it can't be that! It *has* to be something else! Confess!"

So not only do you deal with all the problems ghosting brings, you also have to deal with harassment from busybodies you never asked for. And with everyone else making you question your sanity the entire way down.

I've dealt with at least five psychos pulling that crap.

Makes me relieved to know that other girls gave up because of the complications of LDR. At least that's an outcome leading to the end of a relationship where I can say fair is fair. Or that some wanted things to be a go, but then she died for whatever reason before the ship could properly launch. Yeah, it hurts, but everyone has to die some time.

[imtiaz45]

Ghosting, abruptly cutting off all communication with a person, can inflict significant emotional harm. It leaves individuals in a state of confusion, anxiety, and self-doubt, as they are left without closure or understanding. The abrupt disappearance undermines trust and damages self-esteem, leading to feelings of rejection and abandonment. This harmful practice prevents healthy communication and resolution, hindering personal growth and fostering unresolved emotional baggage. The impact is particularly profound in romantic relationships, friendships, or professional settings where collaboration is essential. Ghosting perpetuates a culture of disrespect and undermines empathy, hindering the development of meaningful connections. It is crucial to recognize the consequences of ghosting and prioritize open, honest communication to promote understanding, closure, and emotional well-being for all parties involved. Building a culture of respect and consideration contributes to healthier relationships and a more compassionate society.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/BaAeatcpkAY

[JustinTheGreat]

there are certain scenarios where ghosting might be the best option. If you’re dealing with someone who’s a walking red flag or abusive, it might be best to just ghost to avoid a dangerous situation. Or even if someone’s simply just an asshole, I don’t think they deserve an explanation.

Some people are also just not mature enough to have that conversation. Some will start an argument and drama even if you are respectful about it.

I recently ghosted someone I met at a show. we talked and exchanged socials cause he needed a friend to attend more shows with him.
After meeting with him again I realized he’s an asshole and I wasn’t interested in being his friend. So when he asked to go out together again, I didn’t respond.
I know he is not emotionally mature enough to handle an explanation…he’s just gonna get defensive. we’ve only hung out like 2 or 3 times.
We barely know each other so quite frankly if he gets in his feelings about me not responding, that’s his own problem lol. He should be a nicer person.

[Chelsdope0]

I’ve never been ghosted before… but I experienced my first ghosting and it’s an awful feeling especially when you’re already anxious about dating and rejection…

im learning that it is apart of dating and it happens… but this was one was different…

If you already struggle with feelings of unworthiness and low self esteem/ depression then it can really hurt…

I felt really hurt by this guy… deeply hurt..

I felt like he indirectly said “I can do better “…. You’re not worth giving an explanation to…

then seeing him in the store two weeks later with another girl

i have a history of men doing better and finding someone else… and I’m still left to figure out what happened…

It started a drug habit for me to cope emotionally

[Chelsdope0]

It was after a first date

[Hawkes_Lady]

I am very sorry that happened to you. I think ghosting someone is a very childish and immature thing to do. If a friendship or romantic relationship isn't working for you, have the balls to stand in front of that person and tell them, give them a reason (any reason). Allow them what they need to move on.

I feel for you and for everyone who gets ghosted. I thought that I was making a lifelong friend here. We had so much in common, we had the same sense of humor, and we liked the same kinds of things. We talked for hours, hours we spent talking about everything. And then, out of nowhere, he told me, "I'll always be your friend." then poof, he was gone. I can't message him, I can't talk to him, I can't ask him why. All I can do is try to pick up the pieces of my heart and move on. But, I had issues trusting before and now I don't know how I am supposed to try and trust anyone again.

[Chelsdope0]

It hurt a lot bc we lived 5 miles from eachother so guess what that means? Ofc I would run into him with another girl… I was heartbroken.. I’m very sensitive but this was just a different story…

I didn’t want anything at all and he knew that… I felt like he wanted a bit More and really took initiative and invested in understanding me… bc I tried to push him away.. I tried to give it a go and I deeply felt wow maybe wants to love you and understand you…. It’s hard letting guys in… i regret it terribly bc I wasn’t ready to date and I never felt pressured by him thank goodness …. but it’s like after all that you do me this wrong

“Luckily “ after several attempts to reach him he did give me “closure “ in the end

Did I like it no… but ofc it revolved around him eventually wanting sex…

[YoureStillASlob]

damn its probably because you're ugly as hell

[YoureStillASlob]

oh lets have a pity party! You loose slits would probably do just the same thing and probably have done the same shit. Doesn't feel so nice? huh? you fucking whores. Just go sleep around and forget about it im sure thatll help. SLOBS

[Chelsdope0]

@YoureStillASlob whew a lot of projection.. I could have been ugly to him but that doesn’t give him the right to treat you any kind of way

[YoureStillASlob]

No you definitely are ugly, you should looser weight for your own good. Sorry I have to be nasty to you but look around you woman are all nasty and sick. I wish we could be kind, but youve all made your choices. Yup you're ugly and he ghosted out of disgust. Hows that feel? Bet its not as bad as the men who spend 10 years in isolation that you all mock. You entreat suicidal people to kill themselves and want a pity party all day too. you're ugly , your personality is ugly, thats why he ran from you. The world is ugly. Lets make this world a HELL thats what you nasty souled freaks want. Have fun

[Chelsdope0]

@YoureStillASlob you’re right. I’m trying to lose weight. I am thick

I told him that I would and wanted to get work done before meeting… what kind of work should I get done

[Chelsdope0]

He did say I was perfect and that nothing is wrong

[SoLongPeople]

Im very sorry for what I've said. I didn't mean any of that. This website is jarring, the people here are sick. they tell eachother to kill themselves. You have too kind a soul. Im sorry again. Nothing is wrong with you dont think that please

you should exercise you know for your own health. and you should take steps towards that every day even though it is very hard.

but please are you asking me about plastic surgery? To your pretty face? Why do you think that? Is it because of sick bastards like me? You do not need that, you are very beautiful, and you should not worry so much. Please really do not worry yourself so much. and quit this drug habit that is really not good to be dependent on a drug, please trust me on that.

I do not know your story but if you do meet him you should try to be open and see where you stand do not lead yourself on that will only cause pain. This is love out there for woman, but you must work hard. Please forget this and I will not ask you forgiveness. I am very ridiculous. Im sorry for that again. please take care of yourself. If I had been sicker who knows what I'd say, dont trust people here. There is no humanity here

[SoLongPeople]

but you are beautiful dont forget that you are all so beautiful. dont become bitter whatever happens

[Chelsdope0]

@SoLongPeople oh okay, I used to hearing similar things. I appreciate the apology. I’m already very insecure so it’s nothing you did wrong

[patriots123123]

Yeah ghosting is so immature. It just shows that person is a coward and can't express their feelings like an adult. I will say there are couple instances where ghosting is ok such as the person may cause harm to you or someone else and if you were talking to the person online and you never made any plans to meet them in person. If you talk to someone online you don't have a relationship with them and haven't met them so you don't owe them anything. If its a family member, friend, or someone you're in a relationship with then its a shitty thing to do. Usually when it comes to online dating on the first to third date I don't care if someone ghosts me because there isn't that much time invested and it has happened to me before. However, I always tell someone if I'm not feeling it no matter what number of date it is if they ask about seeing me again.

[Sjoerd85]

I have found ghosting is by far the most popular way of rejection by women after first dates. About 80% of all women I dated used this method; after the first date, while I was open for a second one, they would just ingore me without telling me first about their decision not to continue. To me, this is exceptionally rude, and when I figure out this is what's happening (again!), I just loose all respect I can ever have for that person. If you don't want to continue dating, that is ofcourse fine. But at least tell me. That way I can move on, and if we ever meet again (for example profesionally), it will be on friendly terms.

So I have never used this method of rejection. I have always told the other person I do not see a future (on a relationship level) first. If that is not accepted and the other person keeps trying, THEN I might turn to ghosting, but only if I don't see another solution.

[Phoenix98]

If it's someone you don't really know or aren't close with then it's not really a big deal and shouldn't be something you should take to heart.

But if it's someone your with or good friends with or they're a family member and they just drop off the face of the earth for no reason, with no explanation lots of things run through your head. Did something happen? Are they ok? Did I do something wrong? If so what?, etc.

If the latter then at it's worst it can mess with you mentally and at it's least worst it's still rude and disrespectful. But that's only if it's the latter and not the former.

[Glideess]

Ghosting is pretty common nowadays, but in my opinion it can be a weak, selfish move. It's more understandable if there's only been one date or you don't know each other well, but usually I'll try to give the other person a clean break if I don't see things working out long term and there's been some sort of connection established. It's just common decency, but sadly a lot of people would rather take the easy way out nowadays since it's so easy to cut people out of your lives entirely without it affecting your other relationships at all.

[kespethdude]

Depends on the reason for ghosting. If the ghosted was either being a nuisance or outright toxic to the ghoster, the ghoster is well within their right. And circumventing the ghosting in that case would constitute stalking and WILL land the ghosted in prison, hopefully with Bubba or Bertha.

[Xoxocutekitty]

Ghosting sucks but so does having to repeat multiple times why you're not interested in someone because they can't get over their own ego. These types of idiots also tend to get angry, saying that " the deserve another chance" and grab your wrist as you walk away from their psycho vibes.

Ghosting in general isn't great, but sometimes a person really can't respect that you no longer have any interest in them.

[Lonelydudewantsagirl]

Yea it’s horrible being cut off without explanation. I never do it but all the women I have been in contact with and had feelings for have done it to me. The last woman who did it was very cruel about it. We had planned to meet up to go somewhere and after I had got up that morning and checked my messages I found out that she just blocked me.

[Hawkes_Lady]

I'm so sorry... that is awful. I feel for you. I would never ghost someone. Having been ghosted, it is an awful way to end a relationship.

I wrote this because I was talking to someone here and for months we talked for hours at a time. We had the same sense of humor, the same kinds of movies and shows, the same kinds of foods. We thought the same way and had so much more in common.

Then after Christmas, his replies became very short and he took longer than normal to respond at all. I asked him what was going on, what was wrong and all I got was a, "It's nothing you've said or done, but I'm spending too much time on this website and I'll always be your friend."

I questioned, how are we supposed to "always be friends" if the only way we talk is through this site and you want to leave? And then poof, he was gone He deactivated his account. I checked his account every single day until GaG deleted it and he was permanently gone.

[Lonelydudewantsagirl]

Oh sorry that happened. The fact he didn’t even ask to switch to texting and only keep the communication on here was kind of telling though :/

[Nikki1989]

Maybe for the overly sensitive and immature. Most people just move on with their lives. I never heard the term ghosting till a year or two ago.

[Summerlazing]

Calling people overly-sensitive and referring to them as emotionally immature because they can be hurt says a lot more about your emotional maturity and lack of empathy than theirs.

In my experience people who just “move-on” are either simply ignoring the emotional impact that a particular situation has had on them, burying it and pretending no one can hurt them until they reach a point where they’re incapable of doing that anymore. They “move-on” to the next person using relationships as emotional band aids.
Emotionally healthy people at least acknowledge their situation and try to process.

[Hawkes_Lady]

@Summerlazing Very well said, I agree with you 100%

[DancingQueen16]

I've actually been ghosted before by a girl who I thought was my best friend and it wasn't until we stopped talking I realized she actually wasn't that good of a friend in the first place because she would put me down like I remember I told her about a toy idea I had once and she told me it would never work

[Jkgordon]

For a 3rd dimensional person it can cause harm. I’m 5D it wouldn’t bother me. I deal with people spiritually on their soul level so I know who you are and most times don’t give a fuck in regards to your negative attitude. It’s who they are whether good or bad~

[bolverk]

I understand what you are saying but there are those who deserve to be "Ghosted",

These are the people who with malice and forethought decided to cheat on partners, and continued to cheat even after being confronted about it.

These are the same people who start with the "Woe is me" and the Crocodile Tears when they realise the person who was supporting their life style has gone, the persons home is empty, their phones, social media, emails all dead.

So forgive me if I do not shed a tear for these ones being "Ghosted", they have shown by their actions that they deserve no consideration at all

[007kingifrit]

this is all true but every action you take or don't take could cause harm. not causing harm isn't the basis for any reasonable assessment of if you should or shouldn't do something

the reason you shouldn't ghost someone is... its rude and there is always a better way to handle the situation. saying your feelings outright is often healthier for your own development also

[PeachyPie93]

I don't think I have ever been "ghosted", I have been rejected but the person usually says they won't be talking to me anymore. To be actually fully ignored, with no reason must hurt a lot.

[RoseTheNose47]

I am so thankfull that I read all of that. Because last year I ghosted a guy friend of mine I didn't mean to ghost him I didn't know who I could trust or who I could talk to without being judged or who I could talk to without them lying to me.

[Hannajenky]

I am not responsible for the way that you feel. If me not responding to you affects anything other than your trust or dependability in me as a friend, that is your problem.

If all of these things happen when someone ghosts you then it is probably in my best interest to avoid being in a friendship with this person.

[Claire2002]

It can go two ways. Maybe the guy is too pushy and I feel that I don't want to tell him no for the 6th time. Otherwise I feel that yes, we owe people an explanation instead of ghosting.