Beyond furious, some guy has hit my girlfriend and she won't speak to me about it?

[Anonymous]

Girlfriend was really drunk when she came home last night, bleeding nose and knees etc and she told me she fell. I never thought much of it till I noticed she was covered in bruises on her arms and ribs, her legs and wrists have finger mark bruises too. I was out for lunch with some mates today and one of them mentioned that she text his girl who's her friend saying a guy beat her up on the way home. I'm furious with who ever this guy is and I'm not happy that she wouldn't tell me. When I confronted her she denies telling her friend that and pleads that she did just fall, which I know is a lie after seeing her bruises anyway. She eventually admitted that a guy pushed her but only because she accidentally pushed him first and that it's not a big deal. One thing lead to another and she's went to stay at her friends house and my mate has not long text me saying she's just admitted to them that a guy had her thrown up against a wall and was punching her. I'm so angry I'm not having this guy who ever he is getting away with it but I need her to tell me it happened first. Why would she want to keep this a secret from me when all I want to do is help? I genuinely ament happy with her going out again anytime soon

[Despondency]

I'm relatively sure she doesn't want you involved, seeing as you're a hothead, and you are not above the law. Assault with vigilante justice rarely works out for the vigilante.

It's touching you're willing to go to jail for a girl.

[Asker]

I just want to know what happened and have the guy appoligise. The only person going to jail will be the guy who unnessaserily attacked my girl, there's no need for that

[Despondency]

I think the person who attacked her is someone everyone knows. People don't get randomly pinned to walls and beat up so I have feeling it's not as simple as getting a stranger to apologize.

[Asker]

Funnily enough it was the complete opposite than a stranger, the guy was actually a good friend of mines.

[Despondency]

Told you.

[Asker]

I knew exactly where to find him so at least he's been dealt with

[Despondency]

I'm happy you resolved your situation.

[MoshingExec]

If her not being open and honest is uncharacteristic of her you need to consider the possibility that she has been cheating on you and this guy was mad that she was going to see you.

[Asker]

She definetly hasn't been cheating on me, I know that for certain

[MoshingExec]

How do you know for certain? You didn't know she was beat up...

[wom777]

ya possible she is cheating.. why would she defend the guy?

[Asker]

If was actually a good friend of mines, he threatened her not to tell me what he did

[MoshingExec]

So you think she didn't cheat because it was a good friend? WHAT? So this good friend beats her yet he isn't capable of double-crossing you? "The Nile" isn't just a river in Egypt.

[Edgeralanapoe]

She's probably embarrassed and doesn't want you to kill the guy. Just try being there for her without asking her any questions first.

[Asker]

There's nothing to be embarrassed about, the guy who did it to her should be the embarrassed one! I'm trying to be there for her but it's difficult when she's keeping secrets from me yet willing to open up to other people. I don't want to kill the guy, I want to make her come home, sit down and tell me exactly what happened and I want the guy to apologise. The longer it's getting left the angier I'm getting

[Edgeralanapoe]

And I completely understand that. But she doesn't want to talk to you about it yet. So don't push. Tell her that you won't ask anymore questions and when she is ready she'll tell you. But you care about her and want to make sure she is okay. Don't push. She's vulnerable and scared and the angrier you get the more she will shut down.

[Asker]

I get what your saying but I can't just wait for her to tell me, she's already told other people I want her to be ready to tell me now. I'm contemplating going over to her friends and bringing her home where she is safe. I can't relax I need answers

[Edgeralanapoe]

But you freaking out isn't helping. Fake it if you have to. But please consider my advice.

[Asker]

Thank you, I got her home eventually by leaving her to come to me herself. Turns out it was actually a good friend of mines. But she's home, she's told me all the details and she certainly won't be out for another night out any time soon, thank you again for your advice!

[Edgeralanapoe]

I'm glad everything worked out okay! :)