Why is cheating and non commitment the norm for society nowadays?

[Anonymous]

[LesterJester]

Cheating and non commitment isn't exactly the norm these days, at least it isn't much different than the past.

Cheating has been going on for like ever. The only difference is that in the past, before the internet was gaining traction, when Personal Computers were pretty basic in functionality and before social media was a thing, people had to communicate by a phone wired to the wall of their house, had to write physical letters or speak to each other in person.

This made it easier for people to cover their tracks, made it easier to cheat and get away with it for a long time. One would have to physically follow their partner to actually catch them in the act, or they'd have to come home with physical evidence on themselves or their clothes.

Regarding being non committed to relationships, this too isn't anything new. The term "Playa" was floating around back in my teens and early 20s. My cousin was called one often because he'd have a new girlfriend every couple of months or even weeks.

So we're walking about the 80s with my above example of cheating when there's no internet and such and the 90s with non commitment... So the last 30-40 years, even more really.

Why it seems like it's happening more these days is because it's easier to catch people due to Web history, gps tracking / Google maps travel histories, "checking in" on posts, information in your phones and emails, messages through your social media accounts.

It's not just about trying to cover your tracks online and on your devices, but also covering the posts and such from others you know and know you. If you're tagged in something at a location, date and time where you told your partner you were elsewhere, things get complicated.

These days, there is so much information about ourselves and our actions online, it's simply easier to be caught cheating because it's all there. One just needs access to said information and a bit of time to put things together.

You'd hear stories from back in the day of a guy or girl hiring a Private Investigator to figure out what their partner was doing. They had quite the business back in the day and PIs were a common trope in movies and TV shows.

These days, most people with a passing knowledge of internet/social media and checking through devices can do their own investigations. They also usually can find far more proof and information about cheating because it's all documented digitally. Text messages, social media messages, emails, Web history, cookies, hell even saved pictures and videos of the actual acts can all be right there at your finger tips.

Perhaps the internet has changed how committed people are these days, but mostly because the internet and social media have made our worlds much larger than they used to be, thus more options to choose from.

Before, your world was the town, city or county you lived in and you met people at the bars/clubs or certain events.

Now being online, you can meet people more easily. Rather than going to one or two different bars in your town, the internet and dating sites have made it like you're visiting a dozen clubs at once and can meet people easily outside of your neck of the woods.

[Emilia267]

You're absolutely right. Social media makes it easier nowadays, cheating has always been in the society and will continue to.

[Dongtai]

It’s not “the norm”. It’s common but people definitely still get upset and demonize cheaters. It’s not a norm if it’s still unacceptable.


Non-commitment is one of societies norms because the reasons for marriage have changed throughout the decades. Women used to marry for financial security and divorce was frowned upon, but after the civil rights act was passed in the 60’s, women became more independent since they were allowed to make their own money. Child support laws also made divorces easier for women to initiate. Around this time women started marrying more for love and not money.


In a nutshell the reasons for commitment have changed. It’s not an essential thing like it was in the 20th century unless you’re wanting to start a family. If a person has no desire to have children I could understand them not wanting to commit or marry.

[Sessy]

I think the media sells sex and non-commitment. Also technology has made this possible and people are pleasure seeking. For example, if you had a bowl of candies sitting in front of you, you would be tempted to eat them and it would be hard to resist even if you know it's not good for you. A small percentage will wait patiently instead and be rewarded with the benefits of a healthy and long-term relationship.

[CriticalDiscourse]

Because the social norm was to get together, get married, and have children pretty much as quickly as possible to the point that having children outside of wedlock was so frowned upon that people felt pressured into marriage. I believe it started with that, and the fire burned into a casual sex era that was fostered by the easy access of the internet and a shift in sexual rebellion.

[OlderAndWiser]

Why do you think it's the norm?

[dwcl99]

I think that with the increased use of the internet, social media, and apps and stuff like that, it has made cheating easier.

Also, with social media, it keeps showing you "what you're missing" and "how much better everyone else's lives are," and "how much hotter everyone else's spouses are," etc., it makes people feel like they are missing out, and what they have is inadequate, so they seek out more and better things than they currently have.

Also, the internet and social media creates unrealistic expectations of others and what other people have, and makes you want that more and more, to the point where you go and cheat.

[AdithyaR]

From my personal experience I don't think so cause even here or on instagram, a post about cheating is followed by nearly everyone condemning it.
Cheating is a deal breaker for most people.
But I have noticed that there are more cheaters around nowadays. Not really sure why this is happening.

[lexiepotter]

It depends on who you hang out with. No one from my friend's circle has done that and we condemn people who do. There isn't anyone I know who justifies cheating (at least not openly)

[Sparda20xx]

Because people rather cheat than put work into their relationships. Combine that with constantly playing the victim, and you have people who feel entitled to cheat

[havingfun101]

Marriage, cohabitation and childbirth are at all time lows and women file 75% of divorces. We get what we deserve.

[Asker]

Wasting time for nothing just to feel avoid that really isn't going to fulfill you.

[havingfun101]

Women lose 90% of their eggs by age thirty and men are at peak fertility until age 50. Welcome to the new normal.

[genericname85]

it isn't and it never was. the only difference now is, that social media makes it more visible. that's why it feels like it has become more prevalent.

[bamesjond0069]

Because most people aren't worthy of commitment. You think dudes want to wife up hos? You think women want to be faithful to a wimp video game loser? Common sense people!

[Marilynjuana]

Decent people with morals and class will leave if they're not happy. End of story.

[bamesjond0069]

@Marilynjuana yes exactly. If you're a catch you're not going to settle with some loser. The problem is that 99% of people are damn losers these days its even become cool to be a loser. Smh.

[AmeerX]

Because it has been normalised so much in media and lack of parental guidance that it is considered desirable thanks to the notion of hotwife, porn and such cuck concepts of women empowerment

[pigoat]

Nowadays

Pretty sure it was around yesterdays

[Mijopapi215]

Because people are realizing that if they don't cheat they will probably get cheated on. Nobody cares anymore.

[Massageman]

You'd have to ask the liberals who have been trying to change things for the last 60 years or so.

[Unit1]

Society has degraded that badly. Yes, It's so bad as it seems.
Degeneracy is here.

[standardguy]

Because God and his law is not accepted today. Most of people is materialist and hedonist. Perhaps the mass media has part of the fault for that.

[politegent]

Cause they can stop and change any time any place any way they want... the commitment is weak in our whole society.

[Shuttlebus78]

Cheaters are trash. MGTOW and Red Pills have inferior ideas. New Wave feminism means stripping and acting like trash. Eventually any
decent person just retreats.

[TheFlak38]

when you give freedom to women male harems get formed.

[GAGSucksBalls1]

It never was

why woul you think cheating was ever normal

[Gabboo332]

I have no idea and it fucking sucks..

[jahaims]

It's how we are biologically programmed