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it may be YOUR first relationship, but it may not be hers and someone previously obviously ruined her trust and caused her insecurity issues.
but no. that's not normal. it's normal to ask, but to send a pic too? very weird.
so sad that this girl is like this. she will never have a normal relationship. i'll be surprised if you still stay with her... most guys would be GONE with this type of controlling behavior. just so you know, you are in a toxic relationship. good luck... sorry that this is your first relationship experience.
But this is all she does that’s bad. She is very sweet, caring, submissive to me anywhere else.
also, i have to say... when you do break up with her, she may end up stalking you and harassing you. i suggest you end this quickly so it doesn't get any worse. make sure you know how to make a restraining order and let the police know if she ends up harassing you (because she most likely WILL). after all that, change your phone number, etc...
i don't care if that's ALL she does that's bad... it will eventually become more and more worse as time goes on. this is not a good thing to say "oh it's the only bad thing she does" because it can seriously impact your mental health and all of your other future relationships.
But what if it’s too late? Like I really like her
how long has it been?
you like being treated like this?
A couple of months but we have been having sex before that. She cheated on her previous boyfriend with me. The guy came after me, threatened me at my work, etc. we’ve been through a lot already even though it hasn’t been that long.
Oof... this isn’t normal, just so you know. She sounds so unstable. She cheated for you and now her ex is threatening you, and you also have to deal with her acting like this towards you? Please get out of this. It’s not healthy.
Have you ever had to break up with someone you loved? It’s hard
First question to ask yourself is do you love her, or the idea of being with who you think she could be. You can't change her - she would have to want to change. Second question is why do you love yourself so little that you feel the need to be with someone that doesn't trust you?
@Liam_80 Blocked and reported. It's called being mature and knowing the psychology of how others act, moron. This is extremely toxic behavior, just like how you're behaving. It actually seems like YOU are the one that has had a bad past. Sorry for you...
She's very insecure and mistrustful. And controlling. Not an enjoyable person to have around in a relation. Oftentimes leads to toxic relationships.
.
Your best bet. Dump her. You could try talking but she'd be the sort that'd promise you she'll change and be doing the same thing two months later.
This is her only problem
It's a fucking big problem. Unless you like been treated like a dog?
How am I a dog? She literally is submissive in bed to me
She asks where you are. You bark like a good puppy, wag your little tail and obey her commands by showing her where you are & who you are with.
But what do I have to hide? If I say no then she will think I’m cheating on her
No point talking to you. I don't know why you even bothered asking if this is normal if you plan to do nothing but waste others' time.
@Alpha4U Unfortunately that's exactly how a lot of toxic relationships start. That the asker doesn't realize there's a serious problem with her behavior...
I was defending her because while we were arguing, she was laying on my chest taking a nap
Unless you're talking out loud as you write where she is is irrelevant.
Opinion
39Opinion
Dump her. Dump her right now and stop wasting your time and life on her.
I spent 4 years putting up with BS like this and I can tell you a few things.
First, she will never change or start to trust you. This is all about controlling the relationship and controlling you. Relationships require trust and trust means not having to know every fk'n shit your partner takes and counting the corn. Trust, faith, whatever you call it, it doesn't exist if you know every step your partner takes.
Secondly, even if you do divulge every single thing you do, she will still try and find something to start an argument. In my case, even when I have proven her wrong time and time again about crap she thought she saw (like a dating banner ad in the temp internet folder, which was on a site I downloaded songs from, that she asked me to) and that I wasn't doing anything she was accusing me of, she'd never stop. Your partner won't either. No matter how many discussions you have, no matter how many times you express your feelings, and no matter how many times she says she'll change her ways, nothing will ever change. Maybe for a few days, maybe for a week or two, but it'll revert back to the same old crap.
Knowing the above from first hand experience, I ask you a very simple question... How many more months or years are you willing to put up with this?
I'm married and got a family now. Neither of us do that crap. We trust each other. We both know the consequences if that trust is broken. And that's the thing. If you're not willing to risk getting hurt and having your trust broken (as it put faith in your partner that they won't break it) then you shouldn't be in a relationship.
If I was dating a girl today and she texted me that shit I read in your screenshot, I would have fer'jigger'KaFuk'n DUMPED HER Fk'n ass right then and there!
GONE! No more arguments no discussions, DONE! Get the Fk outta my life.
Heed my warning... HEEEEDDDD'a!!
Yes you say you really love her and this is the only bad thing she does.
I thought I loved my first serious girlfriend. That was three years. Her problem was that she constantly tried to change me into what she wanted. Like an ignorant, I thought that's how relationships worked, despite my family, friends and such telling me we should break up.
Oh, but they don't know the real her, I would say. They don't know the good things.
But everybody has good traits. Everybody has things we like about them. That's why we went into a relationship with them in the first place, didn't we?
We all have our faults too. Hers was trying to make me into something I wasn't... Oh and cheating on me. There's that too.
So when you told someone else in here that it's hard, I get it. But we've all been there at one point or another. We all have to learn the hard way.
Yes, good things and bad things. You have to determine whether the Bad things in the relationship are worth putting up with for the rest of your natural life. If they're not, then don't waste any more of your life and find someone better.
They are out there.
And don't ever assume those bad things will work themselves out in time or worse, after you get married. If you got serious problems to sort out in the relationship, don't get married. Marriage doesn't magically fix them.
Oh no no no.. I say hit the road jack and don't come back. That is abusive behavior, it takes an emotional toll on both parties. I suggest if you want to stay with her and work things out.. to go to couples therapy or something. She will never be satisfied until she isolates you, and that is not healthy behavior. Every individual needs their space to do things outside of the relationship, without their partner breathing down their neck about where they are and proof of it. This is really unhealthy, you need to put your foot down and stop indulging her behavior. It will progressively get worse if you don't either leave or go to therapy and solve it.
You've mentioned in some answers she's sweet, caring and overall wonderful person in other scenarios. So basically this is what has happened, You've come up in her life too early. She's not ready for a relationship yet, there are some reasons (maybe her past relationship, maybe bad parenting, social conditioning or poor social life, whateva) for her insecurities, feelings and troubles that needed to be fixed in herself before inviting another person in such an intimate position in her life.
This behavior is not good for a relationship, don't bother with normal or not normal. If you don't have a stern and serious talk asap, this behavior can possibly turn you the way she is while worsening her mental health. Tell her this has been bothering you. Give her ample space in your company to express herself. Maybe learn about her past, will help you understand her better.
in my opinion you can't say that your relationship is great except there's no trust. Without trust a relationship will never work. Run away... fast. She is a controlling, manipulative harpy that will destroy your self esteem. I married one - it was horrible and I was broken by the time I left. by the way, she will cheat on you. It's a guarantee with that behavior, if she hasn't already.
No that is very not normal. If she's getting angry at you for not answering your phone immediately and jumps straight to disbelief that's very toxic behavior. I wouldn't personally want to be in a relationship with someone that doesn't trust me.
I mentioned before that she cheated on her previous boyfriend with me. I think this will just take time. I didn’t give context in my question about our relationship. She cheated on her previous boyfriend with me and we have officially been dating for a couple of months
If she was willing to cheat on her last boyfriend, she is probably willing to cheat on you. People that are cheating tend to be very paranoid about others cheating on them
Thats very unhealthy, she is immature and paranoid. Normally I would recommend to talk to her to understand her issue and to work on the relationship. But I think anyone should avoid to date people with this type of behavior. Not everyone is relationship material. It's hard to hear, but I think you should end this relationship.
You need to move on from her. Block her from calling or texting you, block on her on Instagram, or any other social networking website you have. Tell her first and then block. If you’re not careful, this could turn into a dangerous stalking situation, where your life could be at stake.
The first thing you need to do is tell her that you are finished with the relationship, and then block her. There's something wrong with her. You are in a toxic situation that could potentially turn deadly. Just get out of that relationship and move on. If blocking her doesn't work as far as preventing her from contacting you, then you have to go to the police and file for a restraining order, especially if she starts threatening you.
LOL... dude, it doesn't matter if it's "her only problem" !! It's a huge fucking problem!! That's like saying " well, other than being a serial killer, or a pedophile, he's a really nice guy!"
If she's willing to get help with it, that's a start. Hopefully she can fix it. But if she refuses to acknowledge it and considers it normal, your relationship is going to be fucked up and will never get better.
I have lived same situation. And it was hard for me trusting my boyfriend. Your girlfriend problem probably with her past unlucky relationship life. But u should talking with her about to go psychologist and should to fix her past. I know, first time she will think that is not good idea... but u should talking with her about her act. I had like that problem with my boyfriend and he talked with me , sure I didn't accept that suggestion for first time but after a few days I had thinked about that and went psychologist..
The girls not commenting on your photos is understandable. The constant texts and need for
proof isn’t normal at all, and it sounds quite toxic.
I really like this girl. That’s all that is our problem is trust but I can work with her on it
That's a very toxic behavior. I'm sorry you have to experience this on your very first relationship. You should not need to send proof of anything your word should be enough if she doesn't trust you then why is she still dating you?
Sounds like a controlling relationship and major insecurity on her part. You're best to leave before it becomes toxic
No definitely not... That's called posessiveness... You need to be able to be your own person without her breathing down your neck every time you're not with her... Honestly if she can't learn that, you'll have to break up with her
Not normal at all, this is a deal breaker for me. I hate it when people get controlling, it suffocates me.
I was missing context. She cheated on her previous boyfriend with me
It makes it even worse lol she definitely has trust issues and thinks you'll cheat on her because she's a cheater herself
I believe she has changed
why even bother asking this question if you're justifying her behavior? smh
Well, she was sleeping on my chest as people were talking bad about her so I had to defend her
Dude, what are you doing? She's a fucking psycho... you think that shit will get any better. Dump her TODAY, before you lose your mind.
If that's a real convo, you need to be single or find someone better to date! No one should have to live like that.
No, not normal. Sounds possessive, controlling, stifling, even toxic. It can quickly become abusive. I am sure that no woman would tolerate that kind of behaviour from you---and that I would not stay very long in such a relationship.
Please leave this person immediately. That's some toxic immature bullshit, do yourself a favor.
It sounds she has trust issues. Meaning she's not ready for a relationship rn.
This could very quickly turn toxic and abusive for you if she doesn't deal with her insecurities.
Excessive attachment, lack of trust.
You two need to talk. Depending on the results of said talk, breaking up might be in order.
Hopefully not.
Maybe if she's from California...
https://www.youtube.com/embed/_QP5X6fcukM
Not normal, she's become possessive with you and she could be Bipolar and not medicated, sorry if I offend you but them people can do them things
sorry but that is just a bad relationship. probably best to either move on from her or get her/y'all some counseling. if you dont do one of those 2 this situation is only going to get worse.
This is not normal. She truly has some issues or is controlling you. Either way, this relationship will not work if this behaviour of her doesn't stop
This leads to domestic violence stalking harassment embarrassment defamation of character violation of your rights. Be smart now
Lol she's crazy. She will drive you even more crazier as it progresses. You're better off finding someone else
it is normal
if you choose to be in relationships it is naturally make you lose your freedom
in the end , nothing is perfect , every single things has their own flaw
People who don't let you have your own relationships aren't worth your time.
Is that how you want to the rest of your life? Constantly under scrutiny? It's not normal.
She has trust issues. Either she has to resolve them or you have to kick her to the curb.
she's a controlling narcissist. RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN!
That's a Toxic Relationship. I would dump her because she has insecurity issues, but I would explain why before I did it. She needs to work on herself before she even gets in a relationship. No guy deserves this.
I would dump a girl who did that so fast!
9 times out of 10, someone like that is doing something dodgy themselves.
What's going on in your part Do youake her feel insecure? Do you spend enough time with her? Are your "friendships" suspicious I always try to look at me before I place blame try it fellas
She is very insecure. Maybe she was cheated on or maybe she is just crazy
Nope usually when my ex wife did it she was cheating not me
You don't make her deal with your problems so you don't need to humor hers.
No u suck dick constantly too much. rest and continue on me
It’s abusive and controlling and if you did it to her, you’d be considered abusive and controlling.
Wow, i'm surprised you're not gone. That's nutty
Definitely not normal.
Very toxic please leave it’s getting controlling
I would be gone.
she has major trust issues
And the votes are in…
u This is wrong in too many levels.
No this is unhealthy and controlling.
No, it's insane. End this.
No that’s not normal.
You need to rid yourself of this girl IMMEDIATELY.
I don't see this relationship lasting long.
Wow. Sarah is cray-cray.
It sounds like she is terrified of you cheating
Not normal at all and it will get worse.
No not at all.
Dude... fucking RUN, and dont look back.
Crazy shit
Dump that crazy woman...
Not normal
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