Are you more scared of falling in love or more scared of getting cheated on?

[coachTanthony]

Falling in Love

Getting Cheated on

see poll (Pass the cereal Coach )

[NathanDavis]

neither, I don't see myself afraid of these things...

I am very selective with the people I get involved with so... the usual is for me to be with someone that actually cares for these things as much as I do. So I've never been hurt in a relationship or by someone, cheating is something I never ever consider as a possibility because there's just no possibility of it. Loyal and faithful people are easy (for me to spot) because of experience/experiences and the rest of that formula is dedication, while two people are dedicated to each other, cheating is not even a thing.

Of course there's the unrequited love thing, but on that... I don't get too involved on that either, if a person is just not feeling the same way I do, and is not looking forward to go where I want to go, then I'll do everything possible to put my emotions and feelings on check, the reasonable thing to do is for me to just not go there... and I have been there twice, maybe three times it sucks big time but... I would not say it hurts me, that's just how life is and somethings the timing is not there.

[InventorofWarp]

Both.
I can't believe that anyone would actually want me to begin with. I was a good kid when I was young and no one wanted me and I find it hard to believe it's due to my personality since I was always smart, kind, funny, maybe shy and a little withdrawn, true, but still. I was the first amongst my peers to have a tattoo and amongst the first to get a car when I was 17.
I just couldn't buy that anyone would actually want me now suddenly and if they did I'd have to wonder why.
Even as I've gotten myself back from when I was a boy to find my faith and my sense of idealism and romanticism again.
I just can't stomach it and I'd always be terrified that at any moment she'll realize how much of an ugly loser I am and just leave me. So, no, I'm scared of both.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Is it bad if both equally scare me?

I mean let's be real here: when you fall in love, you're making yourself vulnerable and more likely to be rejected, hurt, cheated on, lied to, or manipulated. There's a very strong chance you'll wind up disappointed! If not initially, later on.

And cheated on? Anyone that's been cheated on will always have that fear in the back on his or her mind they'll be hurt again. Or they're not good enough and they'll get cheated on again. It can really traumatize you from wanting to fall for, or get too close to anyone again!

It's like picking the lesser of the two evils...

[sage2021]

I have been so in love with a guy. We had a lot of fun together, sex was good, he told me everyday that he loved me. He asked me to marry him as well. He used to say "I'm the luckiest man in the world to have you. You are everything to me." He was cheating on me the whole time! He hurt me so bad that I became physically I'll from it. It was such a shock on my nervous system that I became very sick. Three years later and I am still sick. I had know idea he would even want or need to be with other women. Of course that was before I found out he is a compulsive liar!

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

A. A all the way.
Most of being in love, I'm actually terrified of people who love me, I'm just starting to healthily accept just now!

[coachTanthony]

Sometimes someone else's love can be over bearing because it's not the way we do it. I hear ya.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

not scared, more indifferent to it...

[Lliam]

Neither. Infatuation (what many people think of as love) is one of the best things in the world. I never hesitated to take my chances with that. And if that led to true love, I wasn't afraid of that either, even if there was a chance of heartbreak.

I was never afraid of being cheated on, either. I trusted my judgement in women. None ever cheated on me, but if they had I would simply have dumped them. Sure I would have been pissed and probably heartbroken for a while. But again, life is about risks. You can either risk enjoying life to the fullest along with the possibly of heartbreak, or you can risk nothing and enjoy nothing.

[ShadezMcgee]

The falling in love bit weighs more on me, but the cheating fear is there along with reality that it is still a possibility regardless of the woman, but at the same time it allows you to take your power back the second the cheating is made known.

Falling in love means vulnerability and surrendering part of your power to another person and then giving to that person, knowing full well it may not matter because they can leave you at the end of the day. All that time and investment ripped out being associated with fear of growing attached to another person and the power and sway they can have on you instead of someone who has done you wrong or pisses you off.

[ChrisMaster69]

Both sort of.

for me I have a very tight emotional bond.

this means that falling in love is hard but when you do it’s very deep.

cheating is a huge thing, and pretty much never had it happen directly and hopefully never will.

so cheating is something I am concerned about but all my relationships have been open enough to talk about things.

[Mofunfour20]

Neither. If something looks wrong or scary id do what i always try to do and use time wisely. Falling in love is good but I dont need it in my life i dont think im emotionally sensitive enough for love. If I get cheated on then its a good thing because her interest was low anyways so Id just go back to having all my free time to myself being single til the next chick i like gives me choosing signals. I don't know how id loose in either situation

[ChiTown33]

I really don't have to worry about either. Very few women are interested in me. And the few that are I pretty much ensure that they go elsewhere. So I really don'tcever have to worry about being cheated on. On the other hand I still feel but I'm doing my best to stop even that. So yes I still can fall in love which is why I do my best limit interaction.

[Little_Bumblebee]

I'm extremely scared of falling in love.
I'm scared that I will get cheated on by someone I love.
I'm scared to end up hurting someone.
I'm scared of ending up being hurt by someone I love.

So in a way both.

[electromagnetic]

Neither to be honest. I feel like those are all part of life that can and can't be controlled depending on where life takes you. I think I'm more concerned about falling in love with someone then falling out years down the line.

[Vikkrram]

I am scared of falling in love coz i know i won't be able to tell her... that what i feels for my love. Coz i am an shy kinda guy and it's hard for me to express my feelings to any girl. Even i won't be able to look at her. And secondly i am an below average looking guy with less confident so personally i don't want... any girl to get guys like me like under confident and not in good looks.😅 They should search some other guys...

[beebella]

More like I'm afraid of opening up and being vulnerable only for them to betray me.

[coachTanthony]

I know in life we can't always trust someone that they won't betray us... we can only trust that we will be able to handle it if they do.

[Anonymous]

It’s the same question. People are scared of falling in love because they’re scared to get cheated on.

[coachTanthony]

It's not binary. Maybe people are afraid to fall in love with someone who doesn't feel the same in return.

[Starwitch23]

Yes, both equally. When you are in love you are being vulnerable to your partner. You let them know you , your dreams and fears. You trust that person is not going to hurt you or leave you. Cheating is scary because you doubt yourself and the moments you lived. Was it all a lie? You question everything and feel stupid. Stupid for being the only one who was in relationship.

[ThatNoUVAtYourEyes]

What can be scary about falling in love? Non-requital of it?
What we call 'falling in love' is in fact wanting the treatment someone else gets from their significant others extended to ourself. It is a social concept (of sharing that family/circle's resources)

[nell3]

Since I have never actually been in love, I feel as though my explanation for the fear wouldn't be necessarily valid. However, objectively speaking I would still say that I would be more afraid of sexual infidelity because of STDs/STIs. I would be absolutely furious if I were to ever end up with a life long STD!

[YESIMFUNNY]

Getting cheated on isn't a real big deal for me... I don't know why I just don't get attached, either way, it's their loss for cheating on me... I'm quite the catch ;)

[Not_Average]

Do you truly believe that though? I’ve found that most people who say these kinds of things are over compensating.

[YESIMFUNNY]

@Not_Average Most but not all. I really don't get attached. I couldn't care less if someone left me because I could just get another S. O

[ralphphilip83]

I’m not afraid of being cheated on. If that happens, I know she’s the asshole for cheating on me. I’m more scared of ruining a relationship with my own personal flaws.

[Daniela1982]

Good question but no answer.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/uFFPb2QEMIs

[888theGreat]

That is a famous painting. Tow in love in Paris or something. I think you a scared.

[Slim57]

Getting cheated on once it happens once and you actually love the person you never want to experience it again

[FatherJack]

Neither , as now incapable of " falling for " any woman. Too detached by nature & after the marriage I endured , never again for relationships !!