Is it over between us or I should explain to him that I messaged him that out of frustration?

[Anonymous]

Did I overreact?

I have so far only chatted with him on instagram. Before we had long conversations and he seemed to like to chat with me.
Last time when we chatted one time it took him a while to reply to my text like 22 hours. Before he had replied a lot more quickly though. It started to annoy me that he messaged me almost a whole day later. Also it started to annoy me to just chat on instagram and not exchange numbers or meet. So I decided to text him this during our conversation just to see his reaction:

After his slow response ( tbh my message was more like a statement and it didn’t require an aswer but I was mad it took him almost a day to open my message)

I sent him this ” I don't know if you agree, but this chat thread is starting to become too long”

Then he replied”. Hmm I hadn’t paid attention to it, but yeah it’s starting to look too long”

I just left him on read.

some guy said that could actually be a hint that he wants to meet or something since he agreed with me.

[spartan55]

First of all, is what 'over'? Your Instagram relationship? Doesn't sound like it was anything too significant. Second, you bugged out because he wasn't doing things (messsging) the way you expected. So, instead of actually talking about it and possibly coming to an understanding you drop some non-hint then ditch him? Yeah okay...

[Asker]

I haven’t ”ditched” him yet.

[spartan55]

Whatever you want to call it. You are the one not responding. That was hardly my point anyway.

[Asker]

What should’ve I even responded to his message?

[spartan55]

How what you are annoyed about, what your expectations are, how you feel about him, why you are upset... I mean do you truly expect him to just know all that?
I'll leave out that all of this should be handled face to face, NOT over stupid Instagram. But I know that ain't happenin.

[Asker]

So you don’t think he was rude to me?

[Asker]

Or he more likely agreed with me and wants to take things beyond Instagram?

[spartan55]

No, I don't think he was rude at all. Nothing was said about meeting face to face beyond Instagram. Saying a chat thread is getting long is not saying you want to meet. If that's what you want, then be direct and ask for it.

[Asker]

But what if he interpreted my message as if I don’t want to talk to him anymore” 

And he was like yeah I don’t want to talk to you too.

[spartan55]

None of that was said. Stop with all the hidden meaning crap. If you want to communicate with guys you have to stop that nonsense. The fact is you left him on read, so he probably thinks you aren't interested anyway.

[Asker]

I don't know his response kinda threw me off. How can I say without sounding desperate that I want to move things to whatsapp/ phone calls etc?

[spartan55]

Why did it throw you off? It was completely normal sounding.
What is it with girls afraid of seeming desperate? How would you even be close to desperate here? You aren't, and if any guy thinks you are then he is an asshole who you wouldn't want to hang out with anyway. Would he seem desperate if he asked you?

[Asker]

What about him replying to me almost a day later?

[spartan55]

Guys don't like texting, it's boring af. Your conversations had probably all been done and there wasn't anything to really talk about. Texting is the worst way to get to know someone and girls don't tend to understand or recognize this.

[Asker]

I did eventually replied to him after 2 days. I hope he isn’t too mad about that…

[spartan55]

Did you apologize?

[Asker]

No lol. It’s not like he apologized when he replied almost a day later….

[spartan55]

Of course not. So you determine if you are going to apologize based on if someone apologizes to you or not? Lol, okay, wrong.

[spartan55]

You said yourself you hoped he wasn't mad, yet you think the idea of apologizing is ridiculous?

[Gwenhwyfar]

Be direct. Tell him you wanna meet or at least chat on voice chat.

[Asker]

What do you think about this part.

I sent him this ” I don't know if you agree, but this chat thread is starting to become too long”

Then he replied”. Hmm I hadn’t paid attention to it, but yeah it’s starting to look too long”

I just left him on read.

[Gwenhwyfar]

Same answer

[Asker]

I felt like he was rude to me or something….

[Gwenhwyfar]

He wasn’t

[Asker]

How he wasn’t?

[Gwenhwyfar]

He was agreeing with you

[Asker]

So he doesn’t want to talk to me?

[Asker]

Also the part where he said ” I gadn’t paid attention to it” threw me off.

[Gwenhwyfar]

He wants to go beyond Instagram. Same as you do.

[Asker]

Are you sure lol.

What about thirs part ”Hmm I hadn’t paid attention”

So he doesn’t even know hiw much we’ve talked?

[Asker]

How*

[Gwenhwyfar]

He just meant he hadn’t noticed how long the thread was getting

[Asker]

But what if he interpreted my message as if I don’t want to talk to him anymore” :D

[Gwenhwyfar]

I don’t think he did

[Asker]

Why do you thinks so?

[Asker]

:))) ?

[Gwenhwyfar]

You need to message him and be direct

And I need to get to bed. Night.

[Asker]

Please can you tell me why do you think he didn’t interpret my message wrong?

[Gwenhwyfar]

Just message him

[Asker]

Some people on the other hand are saying I shouldn’t message him anymore.

[Gwenhwyfar]

Can’t hurt. Worst possible outcome you message him and he’s not interested anymore. Only your pride is hurt. It’s worth the risk.