Thinking of other girl while in relationship?

[Anonymous]

I am in my 4th year with my girlfriend, and everything has been going on well.

I recently went to a wedding of a mutual friend and I had this crush on the bride when I first saw her. The bride is recently got married and is spending honey moon with her husband. FYI, I do not know the bride at all. I did not talk to her, nor do I have her contact (Facebook/Instagram). However I did take a look at her Facebook past photos etc, and other diggings.

I never had such issue before for the past 4 years, but when this happens, the feeling felt strong, and it is making me suffocate badly. I am having this tight feeling which I only experienced it before once, when my ex girlfriend broken with me, the scary feeling of being alone, overthinking.

I think about her a lot lately. and I had a lot of scenarios, pictures in my mind, of what would happen if I could get together with this lady.

May I know what can I do on this?

[trulyanattentionhog]

Think about it this way, if your girlfriend was thinking about this stuff with another guy, how would you feel? Think about it every time you think about that girl, and really find out who you want to be with in the end, if your girlfriend were to die out of nowhere, would you regret thinking about this girl? If you can’t stop thinking about her, I would call it cheating…

[Asker]

I wouldn't call that a cheating? I have not done anything physical, which includes following her on instagram, adding on her facebook, or even talking to her, as I do not even know this lady

[Fiend88]

You may not be physically cheating but you are cheating! If your body, heart, thoughts, desires, whatever are not with your woman you're cheating with another woman. It's a form of it for sure. What should you do? STOP! not only is this unfair to your woman but you are wanting a married woman. Wanting someone married is also cheating even if you were single. To me you are a cheater. Get your heart back in your game where it belongs

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Only you have control to block out thoughts of someone.
Erase her name from your facebook search history, keep your mind occupied on other things, spend more time with your girlfriend, try to go out more with your girlfriend…

[Asker]

Honestly, I can't stop my mind but to think a lot about her. Due to work, I only meet up with my girlfriend once every week. I hate myself badly.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Well, I think you should seriously think about what this could do to you and your relationship.
Like I said, try to keep yourself preoccupied. When you start to think of the bride, think of your girlfriend.

[Asker]

Thank you for your honest response. Hopefully I will be able to do that.. I am not in a good place right now.

[skytatoe]

You're not getting with the bride bro so spend more time with your girlfriend.

Do something fun, go out of your routine. Maybe things have gotten a bit dull with your current girlfriend and that's why your brain is bugging like that. Just make it fun again.

[Asker]

I am not sure how am i going to do that.. but i do agree that it gotten kind of dull.. How do we actually stop our brain from thinking of scenarios and pictures?

[skytatoe]

That's really difficult to be honest. It will go away naturally once you get the spark back with your girlfriend, and you do that by having a really good time with her!

[Asker]

I agree, in a relationship, the spark is very important, the butterfly in your stomach feeling. It feels awesome. I cherish my girlfriend a lot, but just can't stop thinking about the lady

[skytatoe]

Fuck the lady bro, that could ruin what you have! 4 years is not little, and the spark isn't gone because you don't like your girlfriend, its just because there's too much routine. You need to revive it, go do something fun with her, spend more time with her. You'll forget the lady in time.

[Asker]

What it means by too much routine? Partly why I am thinking of her is also she is rather attractive? Caught my attention

[skytatoe]

Too much routine is everyday the same thing, you go out to do the same things, to the same places etc...

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Love is what you currently have & lust is probably what you felt when you saw the bride at the wedding. Forget about the bride & focus on your four year relationship.

[Asker]

I do not have lust for the bride, but I have scenarios in my brain, thinking about being together with her, and it kinds of make my happy? I don't know..

[Sook420]

Is a No No unless you're unhappy and wanting out of the relationship. There should be no reason to be thinking of another female if in a relationship specially committed one

[Asker]

I am not sure if I want to be out of it. But I am also not sure if I do not want to be out of it.

[Slut4Joy]

just be loyal. it’s not that hard

[Asker]

I have not done anything bad. I don't even follow her instagram, or added her on facebook. FYI, we do not speak to one another at all, she is a total stranger to me.

[Slut4Joy]

just don’t act on your impulses, remain loyal and stay happy.