My boyfriend talks bad about me with his family whenever we get into arguments would this be a deal breaker for you?

[Anonymous]

I have asked him several times to keep his family out of our personal business and he just keeps running to them telling them all of our business sometimes he even sends them screenshots of our conversations I use to do this in the past but I stopped because I realized what's going on in my relationship is none of my family's business and there just not going to like him if I keep telling them about our problems

[lightbulb27]

or an issue to address and resolve.

I did that in my relationship in my 50's. I didn't realize how me sharing stuff like that distorted their view of my girlfriend. I didn't filter very well and so I'd say too much.

He has to learn to grow up, that relationships take some work, lots of communication and you can't dump on family. he has to learn to workout stuff with you or a trusted therapist whom is obligated not to share.

he needs to learn boundaries and respect, to trust himself and to distance from parents.

we worked it out and all good now.
yes, unless you decide you both talk to them and it's an open emotional relationship... so they hear 2 sides. but that won't work:)

[FilmGuy93]

Yes! That is a huge red flag to me. That means that your partner is allowing other people to influence the relationship.

[Espresso-Grande]

Yes it would. Especially if he was sending screenshots. I couldn't be with a guy who didn't work with me to resolve issues or come to compromises to settle arguments. Turning to family and showing screenshots would be a betrayal of my trust. So I'd walk away. I wouldn't say with a guy if he betrayed me trust

[Espresso-Grande]

Thanks for the mho

[jahaims]

I would try to talk about it first. He just sounds immature. Depends if he is receptive and willing to grow or not.

[Anonymous]

Hell yes it would be, and you shouldn't be tolerating it.

[WhitneySnow]

That would be a deal breaker for me

[typicalrandomgirl]

Its def a deal breaker

[Fineasaaa]

He is crazy af