Do you think what men & women want within a relationship conflict with one another?

[Anonymous]

[Chazmatazz269]

Not necessarily. I have a unique theory on why people are so contentious these days. It does require though an acceptance of natural selection and evolutionary biology. We are descended from fighters. Not necessarily warriors, but some of that too. We aren’t too many generations removed from ancestors for whom life was an almost constant series of struggles. We are here exactly because of our ancestors’ abilities to overcome struggles. So on that vain, we are born fighters. However, we’ve created a society with very little struggle comparatively. Most of us lead lives rich with privilege and ease, but our genetic memory demands struggle. We NEED to prove to ourselves that our genes deserve to be included in the next generation. So we invent strife where there is none and we exaggerate it where there is little. Our healthier minded family, friends and neighbors likely have a healthy outlet for their need to struggle. Martial arts, a gym membership, outdoor activities and sports, or mental challenges, puzzles and games, riddles and brain teasers. Some volunteer their time to take on others’ struggles as their own, fighting homelessness, hunger, saving stray or abandoned pets, or rescuing at risk wildlife, becoming a big brother or big sister. If we don’t find healthier outlets for our need to struggle, it too easily becomes an unhealthy need; self destructive even. Our need to survive is kind of killing us.
Compound that with a two-party sociopolitical dichotomy that makes every single issue “us vs them”, and we are now essentially letting our elected officials help us kill ourselves and each other for THEIR gain. And here they had us believing assisted suicide is widely illegal. Ell oh ell!

[DoctorSex]

I believe when in a healthy mind state, both male and female work fluidly together. However mental illness is prevalent and often goes undiagnosed. Millions suffer in silence and the illnesses manifest themselves to the fullest in intimate relationships because intimate relationships govern so much of our lives.

It's not so much that many of us have an issue with the other gender, it's more a case that many of us are having personal issues. A wise man once said, "don't pray for a perfect relationship, because of you were a perfect person, you'd already have it." .. ouch, right?

Kind regards,

DoctorSex

[midnightmoon05]

I don’t think most healthy propel who is seeking a normal relationship (one man one woman - I can only speak for what I know) wouldn’t want much conflicts. However, we do know, we have to leanr to communicate, resolve differences in a respectful and loving manner.

[Pinay_ako]

If there’s a compromise and respect, there will be no conflict. If there is, it can be resolved. If it’s worth staying, it’s worth fighting for. Fight meaning talk it out, come to a compromise and work it out!

[Sabretooth]

Well, there is the sacrifice of make up sex...

[Pinay_ako]

@Sabretooth yes! Angry make up sex yes!!

[Sabretooth]

heh.

[OlderAndWiser]

If we are taling about people casually datig and not looking for a LTR, there is a much greater chance that their dating goals conflict. If they are both looking for a LTR, then they probably want the same things.

[MzAsh]

Men generally want unlimited access to unlimited sexuality from women, and women want restrictive sexual loyalty from men. So yes, there is a sexual strategy conflict there.

[normalice]

Of course. That goes for all relationships, not just intimate ones between men and women. Turns out no one wants to be someone else's servant. Yet everyone seems to want everyone else to be their servant. This causes conflict between any two people.

And by servant I don't mean just bringing them food drinks, though that's obviously something that some people mean. It's more about bringing them validation and camaraderie. It happens that often people can be of mutual benefit to each other, in thes regard, but sometimes for some people it's just not enough.

[HighValue]

Not based on gender. Some people of each gender want an exclusive LTR and to raise a family and have an acceptable past so their partner would actually want them for that.

Other people want casual sex, or have a bad past and are not compatible with the people previously mentioned.

People just need to seek out others that share their same values and have a compatible/acceptable past for each other. For example, people that are into casual sex shouldn't seek out people that are not into that. People that already have kids should seek out other people that also already have kids.

[D_Bone_Steak]

Sex versus attention seems to be the main difference between the sexes, but attention starts to matter to a guy as well as sex to a girl after some time together.

Other differences I would blame on society teaching young girls that a man's worth is what he can give her. Or teaching guys that a girl is just the best thing ever even when she's not offering shit other than looking good.

[kylee2437]

I guess it depends on the men and women because I don’t think one specific gender has the same agenda behind relationships in general. Me and my female friends definitely don’t hold the same relationship expectations

[Phoenix98]

Even in the most perfect of relationships there will still be moments of anger, fighting and conflict. Because we’re individuals with our own likes, dislikes, values, etc.

what matters is what you do and how you go about things when that conflict arises.

And having the occasional fight is actually healthy for a relationship. Key word occasional.

[BoobMan]

Not at all. I think there are some dimensions where what women want in a relationship is DIFFERENT from what men want in a relationship, but fortunately for the most part what each provides in a relationship tends to match what the other wants.

[EllaNella]

Individuals will always have different wants and needs so i do not think this is something that can be generalized to the sexes. if your wants and those of your partner conflict on a fundamental level, it is probably best to end the relationship

[Greedier]

Not always, every one has their own opinion so it's hard to say precisely.

But sometimes happens that both parties in a relationship have the same expectations and share the same beliefs.
It's not impossible but it's rare.

[EmmaMary]

Although we have our golden rule that we will never, ever go to bed on an argument, we do have our "healthy" moments of conflict... Communication and an agreeable Compromise always clears the air for us.

[Guy13]

I know I do not but there are defiant people who feed off it. Narcissist are such an example as they will take both positive and negative attention. I can not imagine looking for relationships in order to have confrontation 🤷🏻‍♂️

[1GoldTwins]

Not if you have the right person! But it's hard, different life, backgrounds, expectations, likes and dislikes, views on the world.

[dustybiker]

No. Certain woman and certain men want to keep doing the same things over and over without trying another angle. They continue to corrupt their own relationships. Then they come here and whine.

[himanshumask]

I think you all didn't understood the question...
Yes men and women wants conflict with each oder... women wants safety loyalty time and respect from her partner whereas men wants just to be pampered whenever needed and offcourse a healthy intercourse

[SaoirseS]

I don’t think they want it necessarily, though conflict in relationships is inevitable. That’s why communication and compromise are essential for relationships to be healthy and to endure.

[Emiliamazing]

We have conflict in our marriage, but we both generally want a resolution to the conflict. Thus, that’s one way that we learn how to manage issues that arise.

[LilyoftheLake]

There's definite conflict most of the time, yes. But it mostly depends on the individuals involved.

[hIopinionated_]

Want I want in a relationship definitely conflicts what a man want. I don’t know about other women though

[Jamie05rhs]

It depends on the individual combination of a particular man and a particular woman. But yes; since the range of what different people are looking for is so diverse, then it is very likely that two people will be incompatible with one another.