Why doesn’t he want me to keep the baby even after I said I’ll do it alone?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend doesn’t think he’s ready for a baby anymore. I’ve decided to save myself the heartache and tell him I’d be a single mother because i don’t wanna give my baby up for adoption or bare with terminating it.

I picked my unborn child over him. I told him i wouldn’t tell any one that it’s his baby. Id do parenthood alone. I told him he was free to go.. etc..

And he still wants me to terminate the pregnancy why?
#Pregnancy8Weeks

[Anonymous]

Well, a baby locks him into some form of fatherhood for 18 years. Even if right now you feel like you want to parent alone, that may not be the case once the baby is here. That could mean child support, going to court, and all of that for years to come, should you two stay separated. All of these are things he should’ve considered before having unprotected sex with you though, so that’s on him. If you want to keep the baby and feel ready for motherhood then go ahead, it’s your choice. I would be done with him though. If he stuck around I’m certain he’d only use this as a reason to be a shitty parent. “I never wanted that baby in the first place”, that is the go-to excuse for deadbeat dads.

[Anonymous]

I can't say for sure what his reasons are, but if I were in his shoes it would be because he is still legally responsible, despite what you say now. There have been countless cases just like this where the mother came back later and said she wanted child support, and the father legally has to pay it. He will also have to live every day with the knowledge that he has a child in the world who may never know his/her father, and I can tell you from personal experience that, despite what many women seem to believe about men, it can be very emotionally difficult for the father, and more importantly, for the child. I'm not a big fan of abortion, but there's also no question children raised without fathers are at far greater risk for countless personal, behavioral and emotional problems.

[Asker]

The only reason my child wouldn’t know his dad is because of him he chose to walk

[SamIam96]

@anonymous, You're 100% correct.

The asker may have the best of intentions, today. Everything changes with time. A desperate mother with a child in need will do what's necessary. An obvious choice is seeking help from the father. Likely he will be married, with other children.

[Opinion Owner]

"The only reason my child wouldn’t know his dad is because of him he chose to walk"

No, YOU made a different choice that HE wants, but YOU as the mother have the legal power to put YOUR wishes ahead of his.

The other side of this coin are the thousands of women who use that same legal power to kill a man's child when he wants to keep it.

The simple fact of the matter is that women have the legal right to choose their future while men do not. And dishonest women like you choose to see your own choice as the "right" one and the the father's as the wrong one. And legally, you are correct. Morally, not so much.

[Opinion Owner]

@SamIam96 Thank you, you are objectively 100% correct here.

[SamIam96]

Let's be clear. A biological father is 100% financially responsible for his child independent of the mother's wishes. Her wishes are immaterial when there are expenses that she can't pay. The state can and has pursued the father.

God help him and his family when decades later a certified letter arrives.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he thinks you'll change your mind and take him to the cleaners anyway.

Maybe he doesn't like the idea of an unauthorised child of his in the world.

[Sour-rose]

No idea what that kid will do. If the kid want to see their father, and their determination is strong, there goes a thing from the past visiting said man. Either way, whatever happens, something is gonna remind him about the baby.

That's just my two cents but this is a new one to me.

[LazerBean]

Because he is afraid he will at some point have to give money towards his child. But you're definitely doing the right thing.

[_Just_A_girl_]

Bad dad already , he will have to lose money monthly is why

[Surely]

I’ll agree with the others about the child support at sometime. Also possibly facing the child later in life that he wanted to abort.

[Jamie05rhs]

Because he's selfish. He wants to keep hitting that pussy.

[clampfan101]

Whatever the reason, don’t do it. Let the baby live.

[Anonymous]

Maybe he just doesn’t want to take the chance of retro child support later on or maybe he just doesn’t want kids ever, too bad he doesn’t want to be involved since you’re having the child anyway