Is wanting to be single forever bad?

Question

Honestly, I don’t think so. I have no motivation to find someone. Plus, I’m toxic and have major red flags that it would be unfair for my future partner to have to deal with that.

caring__1 · Accepted Answer

It sounds like you're very critical of yourself. You want to know whether the issue is not measuring up to the norms of others or whether your patterns tend to be inconsiderate of others. You'll be much happier if you view yourself as a unique individual rather than someone who differs from what society promotes. I wish people would learn what makes them unique and then enhance what already exists rather than attempt to be something they're not. What I'm drawn to is different from what society promotes as ideal (the last thing I'd want is a Barbie Doll), yet women who don't match the ideal view themselves as defective. I prefer a woman who feels good about what she brings to the relationship. The last thing I want is to hear her constantly minimizing or denying the compliments I give her.

If, on the other hand, you tend to be inconsiderate of others, that's a different story. Is it a sense of entitlement you project, or is it a defensive tactic to keep others from hurting you? By working on yourself, you'll learn how to be observant and know when to avoid toxic situations and then start bringing positive to those that remain. Just because you haven't met that compatible partner, it's not necessary to throw in the towel. I'm not saying you need to actively seek a partner, as that may just lead to frustration (since healthy partners are so rare), but don't completely block any opportunity. Just keep your eyes wide open when an opportunity presents itself rather than always assume the worse. Being single is a much better option than settling, just to be in a relationship, but it never makes sense to totally close the door and play the victim.

Kinkyhubby · Accepted Answer

It's not a bad thing to choose to be single. I was single for over 8 yes between my 2 marriages. I was fine with being single and going out, buying anything I wanted, doing whatever I want. I also like being married n having my 2 kids and see how they are growing.

The good thing is you know you can be a toxic person and don't want to hurt the other person in the relationship. But have you seek help or talk to someone, on why you acted that way at times.

I once dated a woman that at times acted out trying to get a reaction out of me, because she was in an abusive relationship before me, amd she was sexually abusive when she was younger. So she would start a fight over something, and then say " come on hit me!" And I would reply " No, I not the type of guy to hit women. That's not who I am" eventually we broke up. Months later I saw her, and she apologized for her actions and said she didn't know how to handle a "nice guy" like me that wasn't physically abusive. I wish her luck amd hope she finds the peace she needs.

So unless you get help with being toxic even it isn't on purpose, of if you really don't want to change, then you choosing being single is your choice. People have the right to make their own choices.

BlueScorpio · Accepted Answer

No, it's not bad it's personal choice. There's tons of people who choose a celibate for belief and non belief purposes. Now a lot people might find it strange cause most people do want a partner to spend their time and maybe even their last days/years with as they age. Most people tend to have a drive in them to find a life mate, however there some people who are perfectly find with this arrangement.

But just be clear, ask yourself is this something you really want in the long run or just for now until you can get yourself together and your priorities straight. There is Chance that once you feel like a better version of yourself, you might want to date but who knows for sure. It's totally up to you.

xoxosilentgirl · Accepted Answer

Nope, being single is actually more fun and you’ll have fewer drama. For what i’ve seen, single woman usually looks happier compared when they are in relationshit. Its great that you're aware your toxic trait and refuse to hurt your possible partner. Don’t listen to nobody bullshit, being single isn’t bad at all.

coachTanthony · Answer

You do you boo.

all_hayl · Answer

Depends on your motive. I definitely hear your side and respect/appreciate your motive. I've dated one person (for a very short time) since my divorce 13 years ago. I realized that I was a selfish piece of work and needed to work on myself before bring someone else into my life. Still working on that. I’m 100% open to and looking forward to sharing life with someone again, but that will happen when it happens. For now, I’m pursuing healing/growth/Spiritual connection with Jesus, etc. I don’t *want* to be single, but I’m content with it for now while I grow and wait for the *right* person.

raven6933 · Answer

Could you be more specific? Why are you so sure that you may not find someone? You're not the only person like this, so why be alone when you don't have to be? Are you selling yourself short and over compensating for it? First off. You have to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you. You can't have one without the other. Otherwise it's a lie.

Heolurt · Answer

"Apparently females think this matters to the world", but this is a social circle thing, your relatives or friends constantly asking you those questions doesn't mean the rest of the world even cares if you're single or wanting to start a family. So is it bad? That is a question you have to ask yourself.

oddwaffle · Answer

Being single isn't bad but your reason to be single is not healthy. You are being single because you believe that you are too bad of a choice to deserve anyone.

For example, I am single and I like it. I come home to a clean and spacious house with a naughty cat. I can cook if I want or just order take out. I can even have dinner alone in a restaurant. I am comfortable being alone and I don't care what people think.

monorprise · Answer

Rules and management expectations make all relationships work. The question is not whether or not you be a good husband/wife but rather or not you can follow and agree to rules to get and give what is needed.

VanillaSalt · Answer

Define bad? Bad for you bad for others bad as in evil? You do what you want as everyone should however… don’t complain about the outcome. Don’t spread your misery to others because you choose poorly.

Tina19 · Answer

I don't want to be someone's slave that they order me to do things according to their wish hence i see myself single forever too and i don't consider it anything close to bad for not living my life on terms of my partner

Little_Bumblebee · Answer

No, how would it be bad? That's up to you. Just don't make others miserable because of your social status.  And remember to look out for yourself

TheVigilantOne · Answer

Not really, people can be toxic and nasty and come with to much baggage that you don’t need to deal with.

Being alone you don’t have all that rubbish to deal with you only have to worry about you.

I don’t want a relationship I don’t want friends either people get on my nerves and I’ve been hurt and lied to so much that I’d rather be alone, I’m so hostile now it’s unreal.

melanieeeB · Answer

I don't find it bad to say I wanna stay single for a few years but forever is a long time and kinda sounds like depression/depressiv

anon1903 · Answer

I don't think so. Everyone's got different priorities, and kudos if you know yours. What are these red flags you speak of? How toxic are you? Just curious.

Faith18letsgo · Answer

No I think it’s good to know yourself and not need a romantic interest.

Price511 · Answer

Not really, just do whatever makes you happy. If being single makes you happier, then do it :)

DaisyM23 · Answer

at least you're self-aware haha, just do you and be happy

ArrowheadSW · Answer

Getting married certainly isn't for everyone. It is OK to think that way.

Jccowen77 · Answer

I think the world needs more single people. There's tremendous freedom in it. Most of the people I know in permanent relationships aren't very happy.

Anonymous · Answer

You have a long way to go without a family and partner. If that works for you, and you have red flags anyway, then go for it. I think many would struggle to find satisfaction like that.

Sparks32 · Answer

No It's not bad as long as you feel like your living a forfilling life.

Charlesbrandonf · Answer

No it’s a choice and it’s made for a reason so yes it’s not bad

Is wanting to be single forever bad?

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