I'm over 30 and single woman is it over for me?

[Anonymous]

I'm 32 and still not married. I'm starting to give me think I'm going to be single forever.

[MCheetah]

No, but you wasted your best years, you're running out of time, and you're no longer entitled to male perfection or ridiculously high standards like you're used to from your 20s. PLENTY of good men would still want you, provided you're actually a good woman. And if not, then you'll just blame men for "not being on my level."

[Asker]

Not true I tried to marry a good man in my 20s but nobody wanted me.😔 y'all act like we can force men to marry us before we hit 30. Life doesn't always go by a certain timeline. Tbh the women I know that did try to force things ended up divorced and/or single mothers before 30 or stuck in unhappy marriage anyway

[MCheetah]

Even women who are 4s and 5s out of 10, get DOZENS, if not HUNDREDS of options for men. All a woman has to do is literally just choose a guy who isn't a jerk from her dozens or hundreds of options, and she has it made. That's why I have no sympathy for women who complain about being single. They never just want a "good man with a decent job." It's always gotta be "over six feet tall, perfectly chiseled abs, a 9 out of 10 face, white skin with perfect white teeth, earning over $100K a year," and so on. Even the women who are 2s and 3s in looks, demand perfection in men nowadays. HYPERGAMY is no lie. Men would KILL to have all the options even mediocre-looking women in their 20s get daily.

You also didn't need to rush into marriage. A good man would wait for you (although a SMART MAN wouldn't get married at all, nowadays! What benefit does a man have marrying anyone with divorce rates the way they are?)

You do not have to rush into marriage, you are right. But you also can't be endlessly picky when a woman only has about fifteen years between 18 and 33, to lock someone down. And most modern women would rather spend that time engaging in Hookup Culture and claiming their meaningless office job is more important than love or family.

But like I said, good women have no expiration date. Good women are also exceedingly rare in the 2020s, however.

[Asker]

Lol most men just want sex its very few quality men out there particularly in America who want to settle down with one for the rest of there lives and be faithful AND a provider. I'm a black woman so dealing with black men it gets even worse.

[Asker]

Oh and I gave none attractive broke men a chance too and it was the same they also just wanted to be players

[MCheetah]

Saying you want "a provider" is a huge red flag for a woman, in my opinion. I don't want a lazy woman who just wants to sit at home and have a rich man feed her and be her slave (and no, this doesn't mean a "strong independent career woman who hates all men," either; don't go from one extreme to the other one.) But that word might have different meanings.

Doing the whole "I'm black, so I'm a victim" and "niggas ain't sh*t" thing, is also a red flag, too.

As for the "most men just want sex" part: Not true.

There's an old saying:
"If you met an asshole today, then it's just bad luck you ran into one. If everyone you meet is an 'asshole,' chances are, *you're* the asshole."

I see three red flags in your last statement. My instinct is telling me, you're probably not a "good woman" at all. And if I'm right, you'll immediately get combative and aggressive in your next response and/or erase my posts.

[Asker]

Honestly you sound like a person who hates women anyway you must be singing too 🤣

[Asker]

Single* lol

[MCheetah]

"And if I'm right, you'll immediately get combative and aggressive in your next response"

Next response:
"You sound you hate women"

Ah. There's that predictable-as-fuck Copium to deny you're a shitty catch and have a ton of red flags. I swear, I must be the Awful Woman Detective or something, cause it doesn't take much to get women to reveal their true nature to me and how terrible of people they are online, after lying and doing the "I'm a good woman who just wants love" BS.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a terrible woman on the internet claim "hate women" for pointing out their red flags and bad attitudes, I'd be rich enough to be desirable to them.

But why would you spend time denying anything I said was wrong or inaccurate, when you can just play the tired and worn out "Misogyny!" card. Along with the "no one wants a black woman" card, instead of being honest and saying "No one wants a middle-aged single mother with a bad attitude and a ton of red flags" instead.

But I know, I know... You'll just say:

"You just a broke-ass nigga, anyway! You can't afford me!" Says the aging woman with a shitty attitude, complaining that there are "no good men left" and taking literally no accountability for her own entitled and gold-digging reasons for being single. Never heard that one before! 🤪

[Guy13]

Once a woman turns 26 years old a guy's perspective starts to change. The serious guy sees a wife and child in 3 years from day of meet. Basically, that means she's 30 by the time she's a mom in marriage.

Once one hits 30 the probability of a serious long-term commitment by same age is not likely. Perhaps, 36-50 should be consideration for you.

[Pleebody21]

Could you let me know how you got those statistics? Seriously, I didn't know

[Guy13]

@Pleebody21 Real life man. I live it. I’m in the people business. Perhaps, you will get the same feedback if you interact with public at large.

[Pleebody21]

Sorry, what is "a peoples business"?

[Anonymous]

Why are you equating marriage with success? It is possible to be happy AND single. Think about other possibilities and reframe your mindset.

[alcorriher]

not at all! god has a plan whether its marriage or singleness!

[Summeroflove]

No it’s not over long as you’re a good woman

[surebruh]

Assuming you have no obvious undesirable qualities, why would you think its over for you? Is an alternative of being in an unhappy marriage by your age more suitable? Many guys I know, Including me are in a headache of a relationship in some way wondering if we are better off alone as either we changed with life experience or accepted situations that didn't work for us at the time so they didn't resolve. Are you also actively looking for a relationship? There are many questions only you can answer, then go from there with resolving it.

I read in the Daily Mail a year ago that "Half of women are now childless at thirty for the first time ever" which of course doesn't resolve your situation but may provide support that its not only you.

[Pleebody21]

What? It can't be!!!
My aunt was given horrible medicines during her pregnancy (before Dr.'s knew). and left my older cousin very short, very heavy with a cute face and a heart of gold. In her 30's she'd long since given up the idea of a man (hadn't happened) and of course a family. She was a nurse and chose to work in a children's oncology ward. Selflessness I guess helps.
A guy popped into her life from nowhere with similar acceptance of inevitability and similar physically and mentally (forgot she was wicked smart) and they both had a perfect beautiful child! Just like me... well maybe not. If it's a child your concerned about have one or adopt one and love them. I still bet he will come along. Keep you eyes and heart open!

[Berethor]

Christmas Cake at that point, but you might still find a man, if you very lucky. :)

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Christmas%20Cake

[WindAtMyBack]

Not even close. You are still very young and have a lot more life ahead of you than behind. The only guys who think that's over the hill are kids, and you probably won't want anything to do with them anyway.

[Asker]

Thanks

[Anonymous]

You need to consider your options carefully and get relationship and marriage sorted pretty quick and it's not a quick process. Assuming you want a family. Your value is dropping so you can't afford to be over ambitious. Depends on your mindset and commitment.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

You may be over the hill but you are under the mountain! As for love it works in mysterious ways & when it comes to being single that can change in a heartbeat.

[andreasderjuengere]

Have you at least tried, or are you 'unwanted material'?

Being single can have many different reasons.

[Asker]

Yes I have tried. But men always play me and either trying to use me for sex or money. I guess I'm just unwanted material😔. Maybe its because I'm an American black woman.

[elvitto]

I don't live in the US. But I have read about the challenges black women face in the US when dating. As a black Cuban it is something sad to hear. If I ever make it to the US, I'mma find myself an American black woman to marry. For sure !

By the way, I wish you the best of luck with finding a partner, black or not, it doesn't matter much.
You deserve to be happy, that is more important.
Stay positive!

[jshm2]

Could be. If you want to be loved, you've got to be more lovable.

[UniquelyBasic]

Well, it's not over because you're over 30.

[Sportsfan30]

You’re a woman you can just ask a guy out and I’m sure they would love that.

[Asker]

Done that and got rejected

[Avicenna]

Of course not

[Andres77]

How much money do you make?

[Anonymous]

Nope.