Have you ever been Body Shammed by a partner?

Question

I think it’s so wrong to do to someone period , Especially someone you chose to be in a relationship with , Why do people feel image is the most important thing in a relationship? Yes attraction is important but it’s not everything , chemistry and connections is most important. I feel if someone is only with you for your image they are simply just a piece of shit. I was in a relationship with a girl that it felt
Like her mission was to find flaws in me , like she couldn’t just be satisfied with the fact that I was a respectful person that loved her for who she was , whether she put on some pounds or changed her hair color , to me she was always beautiful to my eyes , but in time she started criticizing me and making me feel like I wasn’t good enough for her , she would say disrespectful things to me , and compare me to other guys she has been with, like she had to make me feel like I wasn’t t good enough for her , which turned me off about her and made me realize I need to be with someone that loves me for me so I ended up dumping her and ended up meeting a girl that only said good things to me. So why do people feel the need to body sham someone they chose to be in a relationship with and have sex with? What makes them think their shit don’t stink? Have you looked at yourself in the mirror before pointing at someone else’s flaws?

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Accepted Answer

Never.

He was a gym freak and an athlete. When I first met him I was 49kg and he was 90 kg.

During our long distance I was very stressed and ate a lot while staying at home, I gained weight to 54 kg, which is a lot for me because I am just 160 cm. He never once told me he didn’t like my weight, but he knew I wanted to lose weight, so he helped me with working out, set a plan for me and wrote a diet for me, but I skipped it. 🤣 I now feel guilty but at that time I was fighting depression and was so unhappy eating was the only thing that made me happy. And it’s not like I got fat, I was just a bit more round than usual. He always told me I should do whatever makes me happy and if I want to lose weight, I should do it, because I want it, not because I think he will like me any less.

I am now 48-49 kg, I am no longer depressed and I have learned other ways of how to fight depression and stress other than eating.

Now I realize though that I must have controlled myself better, 5 kg might not be a lot, but when you are opposed by long distance, and your love is opposed by two greatest enemies - time and distance, you should be at your sexiest shape to never lose the wild attraction and desire of the man you are with.

Pinay_ako · Accepted Answer

Yes. My first boyfriend in high school. He was a varsity basketball player. He was always controlling my food intake, my skirt length, asking me constantly how much I weighed. Always asking me if I’ve been actively working out or just being lazy.

shades777 · Accepted Answer

If your out of shape or slacking on your health the person to help you should be your partner but sometimes people aren't the best at delivering the message, I've been guilty of that because I was a fit muscular person that assumed everyone had the same ability to commit to it like I did which is and isn't true at the same time.

Instead of just out right being direct and hurtful about it suggest things that are habits of the results like hey lets go for a walk its a nice day, or something like that

AviatorTom · Accepted Answer

My SO often tells me I should lose weight. Others say I'm fine, and I'm happy with my weight, which is near the high end of normal for my height and age.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Only my first one. This was back when I was in the best shape of my life. He pointed out flaws and would say things like “only I would want you” as a tactic to make sure I remained loyal. I’m not that dumb. So I did a couple of things with some of his friends during our breakup that totally proved him wrong and he was the one left crying at the end of the day 🤷‍♀️

BungusHighFivePizza · Answer

My wife and I body shame shame each other. She pinches my belly when I am getting fat saying, "What's this? You are getting fat." Then I pinch her belly and say, "Look who's talking." It is all very funny for us. We aren't so sensitive like this way although I know some people get their whole day ruined by these things.

ISFPCaramelPrincess · Answer

No never and it would absolutely break me. He is my confidante my best friend my everything and I haven’t been able to open up to anyone like him before so it would absolutely shatter me. Before I met him I was at least 40-50 pounds skinnier with severe body image issues caused by bad comments within my family and he knows how bad it was. Now I don’t give a flying fuck though everyone has been telling me that I’m very thicc and fatter than I’ve ever been before but I find it hard to give a fuck when I’ve always been judged no matter what. Thankfully though he’s not like one of those people and always tells me that I am beautiful.

Poppymarie · Answer

Yes my first boyfriend used to frequently tell me that I was chubby or looked pregnant and would often point out how much “smaller” he was than me. He was very thin and I was a little bit taller than him. Eventually I left him because I’d had enough.

RobT312 · Answer

Yes, had a girlfriend that ended up not liking me. She shamed my hairy chest/body and me wearing speedos at the beach. Insults never make ya feel good. We moved on eventually and was a good thing! Found someone who loved my looks

jshm2 · Answer

You've got the wrong idea.

Most of the time, people will act in a manner that hasn't been opposed. So if your partner is always criticising, then it's because you've never slapped back on it. It's the same with domestic abuse; the partner doesn't fight back in the small issues and over time they turn into big issues,

Iron_Man · Answer

That girl in the picture may not body shame that guy to his face and say bad comments, but believe me, you know what she’s thinking about him

ariadneR · Answer

Yes. Everyone except for my hs boyfriend and my current one.  I was never enough. Waist wasn't small enough. Boobs weren't big enough. Legs weren't long enough etc I know better now

FictionalCharacter · Answer

Yeah, I’ve had a couple of guys telling me to exercise and to lose weight. Along with that should get breast surgery to make them “more attractive”.

Screenwriter · Answer

For some people a partner's appearance is very high on their agenda. What was she shaming you about? What in particular happened?

ObscuredBeyond · Answer

Not by a partner so much, but constantly by family members. And a good lot of them have no room to talk!

juene · Answer

Yes, we broke up 4 years ago but I never regained my confidence back even though I've lost weight. Emotional trauma can be tough. It wasn't just body shaming about my weight but also my height.

007kingifrit · Answer

my first girlfriend said i had an ugly orgasm face

Billlewis · Answer

For having the smallest penis she's ever seen? All the time.

Adam1978 · Answer

Well if the chair thing happen you deserve to be laught at.

Flower7 · Answer

When dating a younger guy, he kept telling me I have “old lady hands”.

NathanDavis · Answer

nope... nor I have done it myself, to others

itsalyssaagain · Answer

Yeah!! Back when I was 18/19. I mean it was very short lived but he was really mean about it.

Anonymous · Answer

no, which is surprising since i’m 180.. i mena my body holds it “well” so it’s mostly just my face that’s fat. but none of them have ever said a thing

Nikki1989 · Answer

No, but I have had some annoying jokes about my boobs.

Have you ever been Body Shammed by a partner?

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Have you ever been Body Shammed by a partner?

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