My feelings are confusing can you give me clarity please and advice?

[Anonymous]

So I have always loved a boy from school since I was 14 years old I always knew I had a connection with him since I started secondary but I forgot about him for a while until I turned 13 and since then never forgot about him fully. 10 years almost it’s been we haven’t seen each other so I have now started to crush on another man and I like looking at the new crushes pictures and videos but what confuses me is when I am thinking about my new crush the boy I loved from school pops into my head out of no where when I’m not even comparing them when I’m thinking about my new crush sexually the boy from school I loved automatically comes into my head and I see his face why is this happening? Also when I am thinking about marriage with my new Crush my heart and mind makes me feel like something is missing and I feel I won’t be happy with my new crush if we ever decide to get married I feel He won’t be enough for me why do I feel like this when I do really like my new crush but my past lover pops into my head why is this happening?

[Hulk_kitty]

It's not uncommon for our past to sneak into our thoughts, especially when emotions are involved. The boy from school has been a part of your life for a long time, and those memories have created a deep connection. Even though you've developed feelings for a new person, your mind might be drawing connections between these two crushes, maybe looking for similarities or patterns.

When you think about your new crush, it's possible that the long-term emotions you associate with the boy from school are playing a role. Your mind might be seeking familiarity and trying to understand these new feelings in relation to what you've experienced before.

The doubts and fears you're feeling regarding marriage and your new crush might also stem from this long-held connection. Your subconscious might be making you question whether your new crush could match the emotional intensity of your past feelings.

I'd suggest taking some time to reflect on your emotions. Maybe write down your thoughts, feelings, and any concerns that come up. Talking to someone you trust, like a friend or a family member, could also be really helpful. And remember, these things take time. It's okay to feel confused and uncertain. As you sort through your emotions, you'll likely gain more clarity on what you're truly feeling and what's driving these thoughts.

If you're in a relationship with your new crush, consider having an open and honest conversation with them about your feelings and concerns. Communication can often bring understanding and help both of you navigate these emotions together.

Just know that what you're experiencing is complex and human. It's okay to feel this way. With time and introspection, you'll be better able to make sense of your feelings and make decisions that are right for you.

[OfMiceandMen]

Sounds like your new crush is just filling in for who you truly have feelings for. I always put faith in my overriding feelings when it came to relationships and hasn't steered me wrong yet. Trust your unconscious feelings they are your gut and it typically knows what is right.

[OfMiceandMen]

sorry, subconscious feelings

[Curiosity2006]

Are you *still* attracted to the old crush? Or does he compulsively *bomb* your thoughts out of nowhere?

If you still have feelings for him, then that's most likely why.

If not, and you just happen to inexplicably think of him while crushing on someone else, it could be your subconscious mind playing out. The mind holds on to memories which you never thought you would remember. And maybe it's comparing between the 2 same 'themes', i. e. crush. Just like how you would subconsciously compare between a sea trip/voyage/vacation you experienced 8 years ago and one you're experiencing for the time being. In regards to view, sky, noise, sounds, smell and sea. Yours might be that of Thought. And it's wonderful how a certain smell or sound or experience could remind you of a long-buried memory.

[YesterdaysChild]

Because you are lonely and desperately want someone, so you create something in your head is my guess. Had you actually had something for the first one you would not have let 10 years go by. But, maybe you have 20/20 hindsight. I'd forget about him as he is probably married by now.

[Asker]

I don’t feel lonely I actually have many people around me I don’t feel like at the moment something is missing I only feel it when I’m with another man and the boy from my past isn’t married.

[YesterdaysChild]

So you've kept up with what he is doing. Does he know this?

[Asker]

Hi live one road away from me I don’t stalk him and I haven’t seen him but all I know is his not married other than that I don’t know anything else.

[Asker]

He lives *

[Sevenpointfive]

you aren't over the old crush, but that would change if you started talking to your new crush. brian is over. let's move on

[boobliker]

Go Find the boy hunt him down and tell him how you feel and have felt all these years he may feel the same for you. and if not then it's out of your system Good HUNTING

[zagor]

So are actually dating this "new crush"?

[Asker]

No I am not dating him but I am talking to him just general
Chatting and getting to know each other.

[collie22]

It's funny that happens to me too. I keep thinking I missed the one. If you have a chance check him out. 😊

[jimmy2]

Let him go the first crush