Is it okay for me to want to be a stay at home girlfriend/wife?

[chewyfetuschunks]

[caring__1]

I understand a stay-at-home mom is promoted as ideal, but it tends to backfire. Our self-esteem grows as a result of our challenging ourselves and gaining a sense of accomplishment. For the most part, stay-at-home moms constantly do the same things over and over. They never get to the point of feeling accomplished, as it's time to start all over again whenever anything is finished. You may say that the ideal challenge is raising a child. That may be true, but you have to wait 18 years to discover whether you were successful or not, and a person's self-esteem can't wait that long without deteriorating.

Since these stay-at-home moms aren't creating their own accomplishments, they often pressure their partner to give them constant validation, yet they're not doing anything out of the ordinary to validate. The more they tell their partner to tell them they're wonderful, the less value they receive from the compliments they get, and they become insatiable and smother their partner.

We don't need to be making an income to feel accomplished. We can do volunteer work or some type of creative endeavor. There just needs to be more in our life than running on the hamster wheel. What will you be bringing to your relationship, if you're not experiencing anything other than your hamster wheel?

[TipsyFr]

It’s more than okay, you just have to be sure what your talking about. There are jobs you can do from home that will give you a sense of accomplishment, allow you to make your own money. Most guys your age don’t have the money to support two people and put aside enough to build a business or to eventually buy a home. You don’t want to be leeching off of someone else’s money otherwise when you want to spend money you have to go through him so he can make the decision. He might miss out on opportunities because he spent too much money on you. Doesn’t sound fun. Eventually though in a few years if your guy has a good job, you should be able to cut back on your hours and look after your home and family. My sister works 2 days a week now, her husband brings in probably about 80% of their joint income. She has time to look after the house and kids, she has a loving husband who looks after her. She has time to go out to different restaurants with family and friends, 3 or 4 vacations a year. It just seems like an ideal life. She didn’t start that way though. at 18, built herself a hair salon in the area. Got herself some good staff, built herself a good reputation. And when she met her now husband they agreed if she did get pregnant she would cut back on her hours. The salon makes significantly less since she’s less present but her quality of life has greatly improved. Food for thought ✌️

[Anonymous]

Except you don't qualify unless you're a single mother living off of welfare with half a dozen kids from god only knows who the father is & it's likely not the same guy either.

I'm being extremely blunt but most legitimate stay at home girlfriends / wives provided QUALITY to the house. They are MODEST. They have SELF RESPECT and do NOT need to show off their body for the world to see in a desperate attempt for attention.

They KNOW they have VALUE and they don't have to act desperately. They KNOW that a man who is decent / respectable and in today's day & age has a damn good job will be interested as long as they don't fuck half the town by the time they turn 30.

[chewyfetuschunks]

I’m single, a virgin and have never been in a relationship and I’m definitely not desperate lol but alrighty

[Opinion Owner]

Not desperate - then why is your profile picture one that's short shorts & braless? You said elsewhere that it's a bathing suit. That's about as much as a bathing suit as the sun is water what when you can SEE the blue shorts under the white shirt.

[chewyfetuschunks]

It’s shorts and a long sleeve shirt and I definitely have a bra on lol I changed me pfp from the bathing suit one sooo

[Opinion Owner]

But it is DESPERATE for attention. If you don't want to be knocked up & left as a single mother on welfare try wearing some suitable clothes. You look attractive so WHY do you need to dress like some tramp?

[chewyfetuschunks]

How tf do I look like a tramp it’s JUST SHORTS AND A SHIRT

[Opinion Owner]

Ah such a charming attitude - of course you'll attract a good respectable man with your low class trucker's mouth.

SHORT shorts - as short as possible.
A shirt done just so that your breasts are showing if you bend forwards with maybe a bra or not

Aka dressed like a tramp

[chewyfetuschunks]

Why should I charm YOU will a good attitude? You done nothing but call me trampy and be disrespectful

[Opinion Owner]

I've stated fact

[nastyb]

@chewyfetuschunks

sweetie. take this advice from an older , much more experienced girl:

if you rely on a man to feed you, he also has the power to starve you.

don't rely on someone else to feed you, instead make your own money. so you can afford to leave him whenever he's not treating you right.

many women stay with cheating husbands because they know they can't survive on their own.

you're very young, naive and clueless about how tough the real world is.

[marrk]

I’ve seen some guys on apps put in their profile that they want a stay at home wife/mom so I don’t see why you can’t also market that. It’s all about being honest :)

I agree with another poster to make sure you have the skills such as cleaning, cooking, and emotional maturity/support.

Also, for your sanity, take up a couple hobbies or a small business like selling nails or crafts online. I recommend continuing to learn something like finances.

Enjoy your life 😊

[Summeroflove]

Yea. It’s your life. Find who makes you happy.

But. There are girls who end up alone in the end. Because they demand everything and really give nothing in return. But if you give equal effort, even if in separate roles. It can work

[Apple1996]

Yes a lot of guys like their girl to stay at home

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996. You mean a guys preference 😁

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin nah they just like it. They don't prefer it

[nastyb]

of course they don't prefer it. it must be living hell to raise so many kids without adequate money

[Apple1996]

@nastyb that's kind of on the guy if he doesn't make good money yet wants a bunch of kids. I think this specific question is talking about just staying at home wife/girlfriend with no kids

[nastyb]

@Apple1996

I actually know a couple of breadwinners who dont make enough for their families. Theyre miserable

[nastyb]

@Apple1996

I myself was raised under poverty. My parents were absolutely miserable raising me and ny bro

[Apple1996]

@nastyb there are lots of kids raised poor that still come out fine. Poor people often times have the most kids

[Apple1996]

@nastyb I was raised the same way and had 6 older siblings. Never really cared about my parents money situation since they didn't push that stress onto us

[nastyb]

@Apple1996

My parents were just miserable. We lived in an expensive city and they retired with no savings. They raised the 2 of us on just 24,000 a year. Family of 4.

Many people say its unfortunate for a child to be missing a father. Truth is... its even worse to grow up in a financially inadequate household. Not being able to eat enough food, not having enough supplies for school, being around angry miserable parents, not being able to learn how to drive because your parents were too broke to afford a car, being forced to walk 10 miles to and from school as a little kid cuz your parents were too poor to afford a bus ticket

Being poor is a form of abuse

[KrakenAttackin]

@Apple1996. Like is a preference. Deal with it.

[nastyb]

@KrakenAttackin

you can't prefer something that you can't "afford"

[KrakenAttackin]

@nastyb Now that is an idiotic statement.

[nastyb]

@KrakenAttackin

if you can't even be an adequate breadwinner, why should a woman be housewife?

fulfill your own traditional gender role first, before forcing women into gender roles

[KrakenAttackin]

@nastyb No one is forcing anyone to do anything.

[nastyb]

@KrakenAttackin

well you certainly are prancing around gag shitting on women for not being housewives.

nobody cares about what you want if you can't even afford it, ok?

[KrakenAttackin]

@nastyb Ooooooh, you are nasty.

[Sonorous]

Yeah, just ofc be sure to let people know while you're in the talking stage.

[Miristheiss]

Only if you can find some guy willing to take on a traditional male role of funding your life.

I'd say any woman wanting a traditional man and traditional marriage she be a traditional woman, dress modestly, be feminine and girly, be a good cook, home maker, manage the house, be sexually conservative and save herself for marriage.

Based on your half naked pic in your avatar you post for everyone on the planet... you are not a traditional woman. You are not modest, you are not sexually conservative, you are not loyal (since you give every man on earth a gawk at your undressed body)... etc.

I'd advise any man never to get in any such relationship with you where he pays everything and if there is a divorce he has to pay you alimony to fund your existence.

Men, wake up. Pick better women if you are going to marry.

[chewyfetuschunks]

Womp womp

[Singing_Hollow]

It is however you need to take a few things into consideration. 1. can your partner provide financially without help 2. Are you willing to do all the house work and raising of kids. 3. are you willing to accept that because you arnt being in a income that you rely solely on your partners money and if you break up that you will have a tough time if you arnt married?

[CubsterShura]

It is okay but very risky. You are most likely better off not pursuing it if you don't have anything of your own to help you sustain yourself, lest you ever find yourself in a situation where you can no longer depend on your partner financially. Most stay-at-home girlfriends and wives on TikTok do have their own income.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with it but make sure you become a good judge of character so you pick a good mate. And study successful marriages. Study goal achievement. Study how to change. Study why some people repel others and some don't. Study everything you can on how to have a lasting, great marriage. Don't study negativity and listen to negative people who make you fearful. Only focus on how you can. And be the person you want him to be. Someone very kind with notice how kind you are.

[TheUniqueOne96]

Yeah, as long as you find someone who's okay with that and is happy to financially provide for it, then yeah.

Just make sure you're doing most, if not all of the household duties though, as your partner will be providing all of the income.

[Paulalove98]

Nothing wrong with it, I’d be one if I could but shits way too expensive nowadays.. I’m not even a feminist I just like going out and working I think I’d get bored at home after awhile no offense to my future kids either lol.

[molonski2]

Sure , its certainly okey to aspire to that , all I'd say is dont make it absolute as you are young , but its always your choice.

[zagor]

Sure, as long as you enter a relationship with that understanding. And learn the skills that contribute in such a role: Cooking, cleaning, minor home repairs, managing budgets, decorating - and that is before there are kids. When/if they come along, you also should expect to be the primary caregiver and transportation for the tykes.

No one wants to work his ass off for someone to sit home and eat bonbons and watch soaps.

[OfMiceandMen]

If that is what you want, then nothing wrong with it. I would suggest that you take some additional schooling though. Something that really interests you. It may come in handy later on if you decide to change your mind.

[BoopBoopBeep]

If you bring enough to the table to warrant that, sure knock your socks off. If you think you're just going to sit on the couch all day and be lazy it's going to be a rude awakening for you one day.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Yes it is but go with it with your eyes open.

Know that depending on some man 100% for literally everything comes with a price and won't work in your favor as most men will exploit you in a manner you won't like.

[Guido]

There is nothing wrong in wanting that but unless the guy has a really good paying job it will be tough. I think it's best to work until you get pregnant and then be a stay at home mom. You will be in a better financial position to raise a family.

[Luckycharms12]

Understand it when comes to kids but not as girlfriend.

[chewyfetuschunks]

I understand that! Ty for sharing ur opinion

[Luckycharms12]

No problem

[soulOnDisplay]

Of course it's okay, but it depends on the type of man right?

[Jkgordon]

First face reality if you are a girlfriend you are not a wife
Secondly you need to get a hobby like stay home for what? You have a kid out of wedlock? im sorry only wives get that choice not girlfriends

[nastyb]

just be aware that if your marriage sours, your life wouldn't necessarily be better after a divorce. or if he mistreats you, you can't divorce him because you need a man to feed you.

just the truth about being a stay home wife.

[Fireguy17]

Sure as long as you are happy with that decision.

[Catarine]

Yes, if you both agree with that it's perfectly fine, but you can't demand that, if a partner doesn't want then look elsewhere. Being a stay at home wife/mom is a normal wish

[Nifrayu]

I think so. I would like to be a homemaker myself. But that's likely to forever remain a fantasy of mine.

[HelpfulWoman]

Of course.
The thing anyone gets hung up on is the choice aspect. It's not okay if you're forced into it.

[Drumlin2001]

If that's what you want. Just be honest with anyone you date, and don't be too much of a leach when you divorce. Don't use the kids as weapons just to get more alimony/child support

[Anonymous]

no. you don't make money? you don't have a career? you don't get out of the house? you just depend on this stupid man to bring you everything? not a good future... you'll be a slave to put it lightly.

[Charliefretz329]

Perfectly fine. Just be a real stay at home partner and keep the house up and fill the role with desire and passion! That’s a real awesome and beneficial role!!!

[MementoMori777]

Indeed okay, dont let the generation Z feminazis get to you, there's nothing wrong with a traditional woman 👍

[Subwayco]

If that’s what makes you happy and complete I don’t see anything wrong with that. If your being forced into that role then that’s a problem.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Yes it is however just let your partner know your plan ahead a time.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

Are you intending to have kids and raise them?

[TonyMetal___86]

Yeah ofc it's okay, it's a woman's traditional role but what i don't understand is why do you have to appear like this on your profile photo

[chewyfetuschunks]

What do you mean

[TonyMetal___86]

The underwear?

[chewyfetuschunks]

It’s a bathing suit 💀

[TonyMetal___86]

Still not good to appear like that on the net in front of strangers, it's like you're telling everyone "hey, check my body"

[chewyfetuschunks]

It’s not like they’re ever gonna touch me or see me irl sooo it doesn’t matter

[chewyfetuschunks]

I can show my body if I want

[TonyMetal___86]

You said it, it's a bathing suit, this ain't no bath or shower in here or a pool so it's the wrong place...
Who told you that no one from here ain't going to see you irl, the world is a small place, you don't know the coincidences...
Look you're free to do whatever you want, i'm just giving you my opinion because i think that you worth a lot more than that...

[BlackBeauty90]

@TonyMetal___86 - it's not a bathing suit. Not only is it the wrong location but she's clearly braless. Yes a bathing suit doesn't offer as much support as an actual bra but it DOES offer some support. And then there's the fact she's got jean shorts on too.

[TonyMetal___86]

@BlackBeauty90 she changed her photo, i think that she was wearing only an underwear, anyways she's free to do whatever she wants, i was talking only for her own sake and if she doesn't cares about herself than no one will...

[chewyfetuschunks]

@BlackBeauty90 they’re not Jean shorts hun and how long do u plan to read comments and talk about me💀 obsession atp

[nudeNhorny]

nothing wrong with it, hope you find the person who treats you nice and cherish you.

[soe11]

• Absolutely okay.
• I live with my girlfriend.
• It is nothing wrong whatsoever.

[sheikalana]

If that's what you want find someone who doesn't mind you being a stay at home wife.

[JosyJosy]

It's fine, just pull your own weight and you're good :)

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

Not gonna mention her username?

[JosyJosy]

Whose?

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

OP’s username

[JosyJosy]

Asker gets a notification if somebody replied to their question.

[Anonymous]

Yes provided that's truly what you want to be and not just running away from something. And that you have a partner who is into that and can support you both.

[Spongebobssocks]

Yup! I'm the same lol

[LazerBean]

Girlfriend? Absolutely not. Wife? Sure.

[Grond21]

Absolutely. If feminism was not hypocritical, it would support you

[MustangGirl01]

Most definitely. I want to be as well. Homeschool my children and the whole bit. No worries

[love_conquers_lust]

Why did you pick that username? You were a fetus once.

[Surely]

As long as you have the financial means to do so. It is up to you and the other half!

[AnusNdaPainus]

No

this will keep children from being neglected and needing therapy

[jeffend888]

Yes. Your generation thinks that’s illegal, but yes you are allowed.

[Staximus]

It's ok for you to do whatever the hell you want

[DextroShade]

Absolutely yes it is, just find a guy who can afford that and get on his program.

[dudeinohio]

If your household is economically stable. Then it's ok

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

No that’s your choice.


What’s probably not okay is that username.

[chewyfetuschunks]

Well I don’t like ur user neither😒☹️

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

At least mine doesn’t condone cannibalism of the unborn

[chewyfetuschunks]

WELL AT LEAST MINE isn't UHHHH LAME🧍🏻‍♀️

[Dat-Alpha-Lion]

You’ve already lost when you have to resort to name calling.

[chewyfetuschunks]

Whatever buddy mines cool 😎

[Fromdusktilldawn]

dont let the feminists try to manipulate you

[msc545]

Yes its ok if ytou can find a guy willing to let you sit around while he supports you. Grow up!

[jimmy2]

These days you can't do that unless there a big paycheck on your partner

This encomany is really bad for 98 percentof us

[WhiteBoyChill]

Hell yeah! That’s honestly what I want in a wife as well

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

It's perfectly fine

[Anonymous]

Have you ever had a boyfriend or first love?

[chewyfetuschunks]

Nope never been in a relationship and still a virgin

[Opinion Owner]

I am wanting a woman like you so badly you have no idea

[elizamichale1]

But how would u contribute honey

[chewyfetuschunks]

Take care of the house, have kids if he wants em etc

[Aiko_E_Lara]

By doing the household, cooking and watching over the kids. That is called leverage and if she wants to take that role, she's a bigger help than any mom who just works for herself just to show off her status

[chewyfetuschunks]

@Aiko_E_Lara yess u get it thank you

[Aiko_E_Lara]

*hugs*

[DarkWinterNights]

With a name like @chewyfetuschunks, I don’t know if I want you watching my kids.

[elizamichale1]

alright... well if you and your partner are ok with that arrangement no body can object..
for me i like to work and as @Aiko_E_Lara mentioned her mother... i work and i also contribute in household stuff n i take care of my kids too and so does my partner

[elizamichale1]

@DarkWinterNights seriously? i dont understand why people get so judgmental about things so quickly... its just a name on a social media page and you are questioning her skills to see over kids huhh

[chewyfetuschunks]

Thank you! I only use it bc I think it’s funny and I don’t wanna use my irl name lol

[elizamichale1]

Of course n why not... I mean are we not here just to be free n hav sum fun which otherwise is not that easy... but I don't understand why some of us just start taking things to heart n not see them for what they r

[shortster]

Nothing wrong with that

[Rohaan2020]

Ya it’s fine if u want to

[QuietRunner]

yes it is fine

[Anonymous]

Yes. That's my ultimate goal.

[loveslongnails]

Why wouldn't it be?