Is tipping a large amount of money to a beautiful woman cheating?

[Anonymous]

My husband went to a bar that he frequents and there’s this really attractive woman that works there. I checked our bank account to see that 700 dollars was taken out. I confronted him and he said that he had tipped her 700 dollars and that he just wasn’t going to tell me about it. I understand tipping generously for the holidays of course but this is 700 dollars. Am I in the wrong for getting mad about it?

[Finchie40]

You have every right to be upset , and concerned , because your partner chose to spend 700 dollars. without confirming first with you , which is sadly a huge red flag , and it shows what kind of partner you are married to , A selfish partner , sorry to say. How would your husband feel if you decided to tip 700 dollars to a hot male waiter without his consent? I guarantee your husband would shit a brick So whether your husband is being honest or dishonest with you, it doesn't t matter , your husband is still a disrespectful selfish person , because he wasn’t upfront and honest with you when he decided to make this decisions , he chose to make a decision without your consent which make him a selfish person. Selfishness is one of the biggest relationship killers , when a partner can’t wear their partners’ shoes before making decisions , that relationship will more than likely will not last , because it becomes one sided , one sided relationships usually end up having resentments that could lead to double standards. Also your husband was clearly flirting with that girl , by giving her 700 bucks , he will Try to sugarcoat it every which way possible because he knows he is a POS

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, I dunno, that does seem like a really weirdly huge tip. Like who tips $700? Unless he was trying to like, impress her or something which is kinda sketchy. I can see why you'd be mad about that for sure. $700 is a lot of money! I mean it's not technically cheating since he didn't do anything physical, but it seems kind of inappropriate to tip one girl that much when he's married to you, ya know? I'd definitely be suspicious of his intentions there. If it was just a normal tip I'd say don't worry, but dropping almost a grand on one server is just weird. I can understand why you'd be upset - I think you have a right to be mad about that one. I'd be having some words with him for sure!

[Asker]

Thank you so much for your input I agree! I wouldn’t even be mad if he tipped 100 dollars because she’s a hard worker but he tipped 700 behind my back which is really crazy to me. Oh don’t worry, I’ll be talking to him about this.

[Oliverlogan263]

No problem, happy I could give you some perspective on it. And yeah 100 bucks would still be super nice of him but not totally crazy. But 700 is just nuts to do behind your back. I'd be so weirded out if I was you. Definitely gotta have a talk with him and get to the bottom of what was really going on there. Maybe there's an innocent explanation but it just seems off. Make sure to stay calm when you chat with him so you can really listen to what he has to say. But don't let him try to pass it off as no big deal either. This is some shady stuff he needs to properly explain. Keep me posted on how it goes! I'm sure after you clear the air things will be fine. Just gotta get all the cards on the table first.

[sheikalana]

I wouldn't consider it cheating but I would question him on why he would give such a high tip to someone when he never does it to anybody else.

[Asker]

I don’t believe that he had sex with her but I do believe something emotional is going on because why in the world would he tip her that much if he didn’t care about her? Emotional cheating is definitely a thing. I just believe that this amount of money would come with an ulterior motive I don't know nothing against her at all she is great but I just can’t imagine why he would tip that insane amount.

[sheikalana]

No, I wouldn't say emotional either. Maybe she's just really attractive and really good at what she does. Let's be honest Bartenders do not make tons of money so getting tips is a way for them to make some extra money. Sometimes they need to be extra nice to certain customers or engage in conversation and go the extra mile to get some tips.

[jennifer_bloom]

What does your husband do for a living, is he a mafia boss on a sumo wrestling show?

[Xepshunall]

If he admitted to intentionally tipping $700, I'd have to question the amount he paid for the meal. I routinely tip Raci $7 on a $18 meal but she has my coffee and creamer on the table before I can even get the sucralose lined up. She brings a napkin for my face so the other can keep the silverware off the table. She makes sure my eggs are right before bringing them to me and that my has browns are scattered and crispy and that I have enough gravy. Her beauty is not a factor though it would have been if I were born a few decades later.

[Levin]

Yeah, I mean, she'll be lucky to get £3.50 out of me.

Tipping is definitely a demonstration of power. Like one can only presume he wanted to make her holidays or something? But not out of goodwill since I presume he wouldn't tip the Uncle Fester that amount. I presume she wasn't exactly shabby looking. It's sketchy as hell. You're right to be concerned if his explanations don't add up.

It's not cheating but it's extremely shady behaviour.

[Asker]

Thank you for your input! I completely agree

[Levin]

How can he justify that?

[DarkWinterNights]

I spent $500 combined on gifts for everyone I know. $700 on one person is insane. $700 to tip a bartender is astronomically insane. And actually pretty close to the price of a professional escort.


Also why is a married man even frequenting a bar? Short of the occasional hang out with friends or coworkers, there is no reason to go to a bar other than to meet people to hook up with. You need to be having a come to Jesus conversation.

[JacobJordan]

Yes you are. He left a tip to a waitress who is getting paid half of min wage. I tip very high as well to everybody all the time at restaurants because I know how they are paid and how they are treated

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Cheating? I wouldn't think so. Stupid? Arguable so. You're sure all he did was tip her and not "tip" her? That's an awfully big Christmas bonus for just a server.

[Drumlin2001]

If only a tip then it's not cheating. But you can be upset by it cause its stupid.
But would someone really tip £$700 with nothing in return? Seems fishy to. me

[Massageman]

Has he been a philanthropist with others in the past? Is there a back-story to this? If not, it must have been a hell of a meal she catered, or whatever.

[DryGermanGuy]

That should be called the „tip of the iceberg“. You have to wonder what is to be discovered below the water. 🤔

[LiamJHayden]

If $700 is extravagant for your budget, then you are perfectly normal at being pissed. And frankly with that amount, I'd wonder if it was really just a tip.

[Count_de_Monte_Volo]

Yeah…. Even I as an “addict” clearly see that is infidelity.

[ColHathi]

First of all that's insane, and to me that would count as cheating. But I'm also slightly biased in that I loathe tipping.

[AmeerX]

🤔700$ for an attractive woman working at some bar. If I had that much I would have bought something useful. Is he filthy rich?

[Crankor]

That's a bit ridiculous to just randomly tip someone that much unless that's just pocket change to you

[KrakenAttackin]

What did she do to earn the $700? Even if there wasn't anything sexual your husband is an Uber -Simp/PayPig.

[Staximus]

There's no reason to tip anybody $700 unless it was for a large party or something

[Starrrboy]

Seems like he was flexing and wanted her attention cuz it gives him a kick or something.. but holy cow, $700? dude how small is your dick! Lmafooo.. really weird, that's not normal married people behavior...

[slatyb]

Ridiculous, but you need to each have your own money. If that was from joint funds I find it outrageous.

[Jmmmfi4]

THATS FUCKING NUTS...700 FUCKING DOLLARS

[Lliam]

He's lying about what he paid her for.

[exitseven]

That is just plain crazy.

[Sparkie460]

That is some "tip".

[Asker]

Thank you for your input