AITA For Leaving My wife Stranded In Another State For Cheating? ?

[Anonymous]

Went on a vacation with my wife of 5 years down to Tennessee from Michigan. My wife grew up in Tennessee until her family moved up to Michigan when she was 12. It was a big reason I had a crush on her, I thought her accent was very cute. by the way im 31 she's 29.

We drove down to Tennessee in my car and were planning to stay down there from the 31st to the 7th. We had a good time seeing the sights.

We were staying in a hotel on the 5th and while she was sleeping I noticed some guy kept snaps chatting her. I was like wtf who even is this and so I took a photo of her arm saying yeah what’s up. He replied saying he was thinking of her and asking when she was getting back. I messaged him saying the 10th and asked him what he wanted to do when she gets back. He said he had a few ideas and a winky face, he suggested she should spend the night with him again. I asked him for revealing photos to make sure he was definitely already doing stuff with her and he sent them almost immediately and asked if he’d be seeing hers.

I was upset, I woke her up to confront. She was shocked and denied at first but she eventually admitted they were talking. I showed her what he said, and she said she only slept on his couch. I told her we were done. I told her I was gonna sleep in the car.

When I got in my car after an hour of thinking and ignoring her texts and calls I decided I’m going home. I blocked her number and drove home. I woke up the next morning to my ex’s friend calling me freaking out about how I left her halfway across the country and how it didn’t matter what she did it’s criminal negligence to leave a girl alone in that state.

Her friend ended up driving all the way down to get her. Now my ex came up to my house today and told me she were going to try to file a criminal case against me and if not that sue me for damages, I told her to fuck off.

No children involved and she is staying at her friends house. I am filing for divorce tomorrow.

[Flatmanlewis]

Okay. I have a few things to add:
First, good on ya mate!! She was clearly fucking around behind your back and had either had sex with this man or was on the road to it. You weren’t filing a case in court and like I say with cheaters “circumstantial evidence is enough. We don’t need to convince a jury.”


Second, you did the right thing. Had you tolerated this behavior you have then established the consequence for it and that sets the table for her doing it again. The only acceptable response to cheating is leaving. Period.


Lasty, and I can only speak to California law, there is absolutely zero - ZERO - culpability in leaving your adult spouse behind. You leave her on the side of the road half way between Las Vegas and LA in the 117F summer? You may have some issues. Leaving her in a hotel? No. Not a thing criminal about it. In fact, had she called the cops that night they would have suggested the very thing that happened. Why don’t you go home and she can call a friend. (Probably as they muttered ‘slut’ under their breath.). In order to sue she needs to demonstrate a unreasonable loss, or tort, for which you are clearly liable. I doubt she will find a jury sympathetic to her position.


I love how people cook up these legal concepts in their head and decide it’s a thing.


Move on and be glad you discovered her true nature before having children together.

[Twalli]

With the divorce that will happen I can make a case. I don't study law, but I did, and I know enough of how to make a case out of almost anything. The things that Trump has tried, not so much, but for what he did, yes. Add in reckless disregard for safety into the divorce proceedings and he'll get hell to pay in alimony. The act alone may not be enough of a case, but with a divorce in the works, if she takes it to court then she'll be able to get more alimony than if he took her back to their home and then kicked her out.

[Flatmanlewis]

Again, I can only comment on California law. Alimony is not some punitive excursion where courts asses a tit-for-tat measure of culpability. Many states, such as California, are “no-fault” states where there is absolutely no evaluation into the cause of the divorce and the proceedings come down to distribution of assets and child custody.

[Twalli]

The country is no fault, but if it goes to court and he is the one initiating the divorce, she can bring it up and he will not get out of it without a punishment by law. Adultery doesn't affect it, you just don't need to prove it for a divorce.

[Flatmanlewis]

Perhaps your understanding of the law is better than mine. In California there is no ‘punitive’ aspect of family law. The courts have zero interest in refereeing peoples failed marriages.

[JacobJordan]

Attaboy. Make sure you have documentation of her being a whore. Make sure you have proof of everything you came into the relationship with as well. Make sure she gets nothing and if the courts try and force you to pay alimony lose your job and get a job that pays literal min wage stat.

[Oliverlogan263]

Bro, that's a tough situation. On the one hand, she definitely betrayed your trust by cheating - that's never okay. Leaving her there was probably an emotional reaction, but maybe not the best solution long term. Now things have just gotten messier between you.

A few things to consider - legally, just abandoning someone somewhere could get you in trouble, even if she hurt you. Emotionally, this may make moving on from each other harder with all the drama and resentment. And practically, you don't want lingering legal issues.

My advice would be to contact a lawyer right away about your options to protect yourself. Explain your side calmly without escalating things further. See if they advise meeting with your wife to work out a compromise - like she drops any claims if you pay part of her travel costs or something. Make it clear you want a clean break without threats or suits.

Focus on the divorce - get support from friends/family, take time to process your feelings in a healthy way. This situation sucks, but try not to sabotage your whole future over it too. With level heads, you can get past it without major damages. Stay strong, man - you got this.

[robhazelnut]

I won't ask for you to clarify, but if the "revealing photos" he sent didn't include your wife in them, then your conclusion that she cheated was a guess, even if a fair one. If she had continually been overall pleasant to drive with so far, then I'd call it an asshole move. You can always demand that they pay for gas, meals and lodging (if any) as payment for the drive home if you want to stick to the conclusion that they cheated. That said, if she did indeed plan to sue you over it, then if I were you I'd take a look over your prenup (if any) to decide whether or not getting a lawyer is a good idea.

[HighValue]

You did nothing wrong, and certainly nothing illegal. I would suggest transferring property and cars into your parents' names before filing for divorce. Also, cancel any joint credit cards immediately and take out any of your money from any bank accounts that she may have access to or the account number.

[HighValue]

The majority of women with social media are cheating, at least emotionally, if not physically too. They don't want to give up their social media because the majority of women are cheaters and it would cut off their easy access to others.

[Unit1]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/7lsdJDiJ0QE

Well done on your part. I wish you good luck with your divorce. Glad there are some men out there, that aren't averaging to being "cucks".

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Lol I would have done the same. Block her, all communication should now go through your lawyer.

[HighSky]

No, good for you, hopefully she got stranded kicked out and starved to death.

Good riddance, give her worthless ass nothing.

She deserved that 100%, proud of you, never apologize.

[exitseven]

I think you did the right thing. Just remember that you dodged a bullet.

[Anonymous]

Nah bro, she's the asshole. I would have done the same.

[Anonymous]

Dude id have done the same thing. Cheaters get no special treatment, No sympathy.

[Sparkie460]

Good for you. I hope you took pictures of your conversation with the guy as proof.

[Twalli]

She has a case. I don't know law that well, but if I was a lawyer I would probably take her case and charge you with a pretty serious crime. It would a civil suit because that's money and not jail time.

[Asker]

Actually in my state and Tennessee there are no laws. She had her own money and could have gotten transport home if her friend didn't come get her.. Additionally my state alimony doesn't happen unless we have been together 10 or more years not 5.. nice try dude.

[Drewtate]

You did right. Fuck her.

[Drewtate]

She is a grown adult after all.

[Miristheiss]

Yes, she is a grown adulteress... I mean adult.

[Drewtate]

@Miristheiss she belongs to the streets.

[dudeinohio]

Good for you!

[jimmy2]

Damn cheating so bad