Guys, How much is too much?

[DishLady]

Ok Guys, be honest. You're definitely more intrigued by the crazy little chippies than by the conservative ladies... But how crazy is TOO crazy? At what point do you realize that what you need in your life isn't a girl, but a lady (which I'll just define here as a good woman -- honest, educated, graceful, kind, compassionate and willing to take a life journey with you that's filled with mutual, reciprocal respect and appreciation)?

TBH, looking around, I often feel like... the good honest guys are lost to the fugue of crazy girl energy... By the time guys snap out of it they're jaded, in their late 30s/early 40s, and ruined for a relationship with the good woman.

(Meanwhile, we should also acknowledge that many a girl falls prey to the classic toxic guy only to come out of it broken and left with no alternative than to step gingerly through a minefield of hurt, jaded guys and misogynists... at which point she'll notice there are traps and lies everywhere... and she either chooses to settle into it with another toxic guy (becoming toxic as well as they embark on a dysfunctional relationship) or to completely withdraw from the search for a relationship.)

[HawkPerception]

I'm absolutely not more intruigued by the "crazy little chippies" than the conservative ladies.

Anytime I see a TikTok dance by some OnlyFans girl on social media, I choose the "hide" option because I don't want that to be on my feed at all and that prevents them from being shown on your feed in the future.

I'm also not anywhere near as attracted to a girl that wears yoga pants/tights and a tight crop top than to a girl that wears a flowy sundress and doesn't emphasize on her body's proportions. Sure, it's nice to look at a girl with a nice body, but that's not an "attractive" girl to me and certainly not girlfriend/wifey material as much as the girl that wears the summer dress.

This is tasteful and girlfriend/wifey material

This is distasteful and not girlfriend/wifey material

[DishLady]

Oh my... but can we say, perhaps just in the particular instance of this second photo, that the second woman is probably just in her home doing exercise? (If she was outside in that I'd agree with you.)

[DishLady]

(If it was posted on social media, though it's gross. :( No one needs to show so much. It's an indication of a level of needy desperation and attention mongering.)

[HawkPerception]

There are plenty of girls that dress like that when outside and honestly, it doesn't matter how attractive of a body they have or how nice it is to see. They instantly lose my attraction and quite honestly as bad as it sounds... a little of my respect too.

[DishLady]

I know. I saw some shockers today. Too short, too clingy and skin tone. I don't have to tell you what it looked like. One guy got distracted and almost had a car accident bc he didn't see the red light.

[HawkPerception]

Yup. Nice to look at and distracting for sure. Some guys may even say they'd want to get with a girl like that, but I don't think they think enough about what that kind of promiscuity comes with. It comes with an egotistical, attention-seeking, and needing validation personality.

I would never assume girls that dress that way are faithful. Hate to say it, but how you dress usually speaks volumes about your character.

[DishLady]

I mean... some girls are morally ok, but don't have that sense of how to dress appropriately. I would never classify ALL women who dress like that as being a certain way. For example, a girl who is studying ballet or gymnastics, or swimming, etc... she's going to be rushing around at some point in what she needs to get to her training and coaching, etc. (We''ll see a lot of that now with the upcoming Olympics.) They're good, decent girls in uniform, we'll say.

But those who flaunt their bodies gratuitously and on purpose to catch a guy's attention is not ok in my opinion. (I know it sounds anti-feminist by 2024 standards, but it's true to the values of original feminism (1940s) and the authentic dignity of being a woman.)

[HawkPerception]

I agree that not all girls that dress that way are like that, but there is definitely a correlation.

"You see, but you do not observe." -Sherlock Holmes-

https://youtu.be/388-rOzD9SM?si=_YEsynhr8Nc0OgZa

[Lionman95]

I would say in the moment wants to settle and start a family. There´s no definite date for all guys. The problem many guys have that are by other aspect considered as the good guys is that they are not good at approaching, they are not confident enough to walk straight to a group of girls and ask one of them out. So they at first prefer the crazy girl that is confident enough to show her interest.

I would say it gets too crazy when a guy sees his boundaries and interests pushed out. It gets too crazy when she seems too much of a risk and not interested in settling down.

[DishLady]

So which interests, for example, finally tell you "enough is enough"? Are there "core interests" or is it more like you can't spend any time with anyone bc she just wants you to herself every second?

[Lionman95]

I would say when a woman doesn't want to settle down and is instead wants to have fun, adventures and risky things all the time. A woman that doesn't care for responsibilities and whenever something goes wrong it's never her problem.

[DishLady]

Fair enough.

[Lionman95]

Thanks for the MHO.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the magnetic pull of those “crazy little chippies” versus landing the embrace of a lady—equipped with grace, kindness, and an educational background to boot—is like dancing on a tightrope over the Grand Canyon; thrilling yet terrifying! The heartthrob meter often spikes for the wild and mysterious, but alarm bells start ringing when the rollercoaster takes one too many loops. Suddenly, questions surface: "Am I in for the ride of my life or just dizzy in love?"

When does one wave the white flag and yearn for a partner not just for the party but for the journey? It’s when the drama eclipses the laughter, when the bonfire of passion burns down to embers of chaos. That's the wake-up call; craving someone who brings peace, intellectual banter over breakfast, and understands love isn't a battlefield but a mutual marathon.

No Romeo wants to become a jaded knight, nor do our Juliets fancy the idea of piecing a heart back together. It's this intricate ballet between yearning for excitement and seeking solace in genuine connection that defines the quest for love. Let’s not forget, amidst the noise, good souls are whispering. It's all about tuning our frequencies to catch those whispers, and recognizing that mutual respect and appreciation aren’t mythical creatures but the very foundation of timeless love stories. Stick around, the dance floor is vast, and the right partner makes all the difference. Let's aim for a dance that's more waltz, less breakdance, shall we? 😉

[exitseven]

I dated somebody who was the polar opposite of every girl ever dated. She really was crazy, not just like "she;s crazy" but she really had issues. I think she was bi-polar or something.

She could be really sweet and loving but every few weeks she would go off the rails. She could be really mean and abusive. She would say the worst thing to me and had physically attacked me on a few occasions.

I think she was an alcoholic as well. She worked as a bartender and her whole life revolved around drinking and partying. She worked from early afternoon until 10PM and she could go out and drink and then sleep until noontime. She would get angry because I had to be up early. I was going to college and working part time and I could not stay out with her until late.

Still, when we would be together it would really be a lot of fun and I sort of experienced a life very different from anything I had ever known before.

[DishLady]

I'm sorry you had to experience her dark side, but hope you have enough positive memories to carry you through that time in your life.

So was that your official "crazy girl" inoculation or do you still seek them out?

[exitseven]

No, that was it. I met my future wife a few months after that She was better than the whole lot of them put together

[DishLady]

Of course she was. <3

[exitseven]

Thanks for that

[ProbablyClueless]

As soon as we delve into the territory of being upset with me for doing what you told me to do. That's where I draw the line. Because if you tell me to do something, I'm going to do the thing you told me to do.

This kind of thing is why I tell people that I'm more than happy to do them favors and that I enjoy doing favors, and I genuinely expect nothing in return (unless otherwise stated). HOWEVER my one single requirement is that ALL REQUESTS FOR FAVORS MUST BE PUT INTO WRITING.

You want a sandwich? Great, I'll pick one up. Put the exact sandwich you want into writing. This benefits me by providing protection in the event you aren't happy with the results, and it protects you by clarifying exactly what you want/are expecting.

If that sounds exhausting to you, I'm sorry to hear it, but I've been on the receiving end of abuse too many times after doing exactly what I was told to do.

[DishLady]

Ah! My friend complains about this all the time and asks me if this is a trick women do -- to ask something and then complain. (It's not... it's just the "crazy of the month" he happens to be dating.)

[ProbablyClueless]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. I've actually never thought it was a woman thing. I've caught that same treatment from some other men as well.

For me it boils down to a basic respect thing. If you do something that inconveniences me (and unfortunately that is the reality of asking a favor of someone; it inconveniences them), you can't turn around and punish me for the fact it didn't work out the way you wanted. That's a way to wear out your welcome real fast.

[DishLady]

Agreed. Mutual respect and reciprocity is everything.

[Grond21]

This is why it's so dangerous to have gotten rid of all of our sexual and relationship standards in the 1960s. The Sexual Revolution threw out centuries of refinement in our romantic relationships. It wasn't all perfect, but gosh was it better than today. Now so many people are hurt and bitter, carrying that bitterness from relationship to relationship. Not knowing how to do it right, not knowing what that looks like, and just hurting themselves and each other as they go along.

A girl who is a little crazy is always going to be appealing at first, at least on some level. Kind of like very sugary drinks are appealing. But it quickly becomes clear that there is no stability or happiness there.

For me, I can't be with someone like that. I want someone stable, good, kind, loving, nurturing, intelligent, and beautiful. And I'm lucky enough to have found her.

[WodensGedriht]

Unfortunately it seems that modern women don't want stable, good, kind, loving, nurturing and intelligent men in return.
They just want a retarded coomer they can control.

[Grond21]

Some are like that, yes

[DishLady]

@WodensGedriht Where is that coming from? That's a load of *.

[DishLady]

@Grond21 Thank you. You're a gentleman.

[Grond21]

My pleasure

[WodensGedriht]

Because when men open up to women they largely get treated as a "nice guy" and taken advantage of. Many women only seem to respect and desire you when you boost your ego to 1000% even though they're unaware of it.
Just cause a guy is nice doesn't make him a beta male.
I almost knocked someone out for insulting my appearance yesterday (he had to pretend he was joking), but I actually way too polite when I talk outside the internet. Just cause of that a lot of women will see me as "nice" which is probably why a 6'4'' guy is still a virgin at 24.

[RetroReviews]

Just like when Eve took a bite of the fruit in the garden of Eden. It looked very appealing and was so intriguing and was irresistible. Sadly a lot of things in life that are exciting interesting and holds our attention in the long run are not good for us. But when we're young we feel we're different we know more than the generation before us and we think none of that stuff will happen to us. But experience is a dear teacher. As we get older immature we're able to look back and reflect and say yeah that was dumb hopefully it happens before we're too old and over the hill jaded and used up. To where we could be with someone for the right reasons, look for the qualities that matter. And have a happy and fulfilling life together for our remaining years.

[MrGTAB]

I had to look up what you meant by "chippies" and apparently it means prostitutes xD

But anyways, I suppose I generally like women who are unusual because they relate to me being autistic more. I tend to be pretty patient and understanding as well so I am accepting of women even if they have multiple things wrong with them. One girl I was with casually but actually lived with had schizophrenia, bipolar, PTSD & borderline. Solid girl when on her meds.

People with less empathy tend to be attracted to me as well because I am accepting of that so long as they don't hurt me.

What do I really want? Someone who is truly there for me and they're not afraid to be perverted in private. I like a bit of craziness because it adds some unpredictability and excitement but stability does come first!

[DishLady]

Sorry... it's a term my gran used and it stuck with me bc it's not as rude as saying the latter...

Ok, yes, I got you... but that's not really "crazy" so much as being fun-loving with her person of interest, yes?

[MrGTAB]

It's okay I have sex worker friends and know most people don't like it regardless. I don't expect people to respect it but I personally see nothing wrong with sex work if it's done safely.

I suppose! I have been with people that were technically "psychotic" but they're reliable with me, never fucked me over, etc. I like it when women get a little too possessive with me because of the ego satisfaction but ultimately I prioritize loyalty, enough intelligence to get along with me (even technically "dumb" people can be socially intelligent in my opinion) and actually loving me. I give a lot of myself when I feel secure enough.

[DishLady]

Possessive girl isn't always the worst thing, 😂.

[MrGTAB]

It's very flattering and makes me feel desirable. I find monogamy to be very cute, like I am the only one they need romantically, sexually and vice versa.

[RetroReviews]

I didn't know what chippies meant either. So I guess I appreciate it a woman who is blunt and not worried about being PC

[WodensGedriht]

There's a lot wrong with profiting off the vices and loneliness of men. And there's a lot wrong with pimps using women as sex cattle.
Modern people just lack the morals to see this, thanks to Marxist cultural revolutions.
They rationalise everything thinking they know the answers but there's more to human nature then rationality.

[SixFootSexy]

The truth is that men and women have to battle their inner lust to do whatever selfish things they want so that civilization can continue. Used to be, there was shame and honor paired with family structures to support young couples. That doesn't really exist very much anymore, so society is decaying. Jennifer Aniston can't even find a date anymore even though she's had relationships with several A-listers she fumbled in the past like Brad Pitt.

That's what lots of "role models" have done with their lives, had hedonistic lives, went through tons of bodies, zero kids, relationships or family to show for it.

[Anonymous]

Boys are more intrigued by the crazy little chippies, but men are more interested in the conservative ladies. The answer to your question varies from guy to guy, but it depends on when he grows up and wants a real relationship.

Having said that, marriage is no longer the carrot it used to be for men. Half of marriages end in divorce, women file 80% of them, and men usually get screwed in divorce. We've all grown up watching it happen to the older guys in our family and circle of friends. Most of us have realized it's no longer worth the risk.

[DishLady]

But not even considering marriage -- because frankly, enough women have been so burned (abused, swindled, etc.) in toxic marriages since the dawn of time that it's certainly not anyone's particular "carrot" as you say. What about just having a healthy relationship? Where has THAT gone?

[Opinion Owner]

For a man, there is little difference between marriage and a long-term committed relationship, especially when children are involved. You see that, right?

[DishLady]

For some men, yes -- the gentleman sees them as pretty much the same thing. The childish sort of man will dodge the issue and mess around, children or not. That's what I mean. There's a distinction between the good guys and then the rest of the lot.

[Opinion Owner]

Certainly there's a distinction between the good guys and the rest of the lot. I didn't take that point from your original post, so thank you for stating it more clearly.

And, of course, the same can be said about women, if we're boing honest. It's also a fact that men get "abused" by women in marriage and relationships just as much as women do by men, in different but equally hurtful ways.

But the simple fact is that in marriage, and yes, committed relationships, men have more to lose than women... today. And that is killing marriage, and men's attitude toward relationships.

[DishLady]

Yes, I'm aware that women also have their moments. We can probably venture to say that there's a... range of insanity for both genders. Both sides have their heroes and their villains.

I can't agree that men lose more, having lived through a divorce in which he robbed me of every material thing as well as the most productive years of my youth. Women -- good women, who don't g. a. s. about alimony and all the nonsense and just want to get away from a bad guy -- lose a lot more than men do. If you want, you can DM me and I'll tell you the story of the woman whose hubby locked her in the house with some phone app while he was half-way across the world. Terrible story.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm truly sorry you went through that. That's horrible. I know there are examples where the woman loses more than the man in divorce. But the simple fact is that men lose more often, by a wide margin. The legal system creates a condition where women win in divorce and men lose, far more often than not. And many (most?) women take full advantage of that when the time comes. I've seen it first hand far too many times in my own family and acquaintances. I've also seen how it destroys men's lives and contributes significantly to the epidemic of suicide in middle aged men. It's destroying the institution of marriage in the US, and the legal system and women are mostly to blame for it. The longer it takes for all of us to be honest about it, the longer it will take to address the real problem, and the less likely the institution of marriage will ever be save.

[DishLady]

Yeah, I know the type -- actually, the women who "collect" husbands and just end up with everything they could possibly want... I was thinking about that yesterday, like "Hmm, if I was only 99% more of a devious b***ch I could have had all that stuff too." But I'm ok... and so are my loved ones, which is the important thing. (I would've loved not to have given up my car, though... lol.)

You're right, "The longer it takes for all of us to be honest about it, the longer it will take to address the real problem, and the less likely the institution of marriage will ever be save." Agreed.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm glad you and your loved ones are ok. As you said, that's the most important thing. I wish you the best.

Peace

[WodensGedriht]

Lmao forgetting all the men who get screwed over by women. And women do have the advantage when it comes to the monopoly over sex, they always have. It's patriarchy that actually balanced it. And you've no doubt been taught by your socialist education that women were historically oppressed and constantly beaten.

[BoopBoopBeep]

There was a time when I'd put up with the crazies because I liked getting laid and thought that's all I could get. Now that it's not really a limited commodity I have zero patience for any manifestation of crazy that's going to bring drama into my life. You can have a host of crazies that doesn't affect me, and sure, have at it, you do you. Soon as your crazy negatively impacts me though, one of us is walking through a door.

[DishLady]

So, to clarify, you'd still go out with the crazy girl as long as it doesn't impact you... or do you mean strictly hookups?

[BoopBoopBeep]

I wouldn't date one. If, when I'm single, she wanted to have a fling on one of my vacations or something, sure, but I'm not bringing crazy back to my place and she's never going to know where I work/live

[DishLady]

I got you. Thanks for the clarification.

[BoopBoopBeep]

You are quite welcome. To be fair, I always make it quite clear that "this is only going to be a vacation thing" or whatever, so we're both on the same page.

[DishLady]

You know... I've seen that bite a guy in the a** before, so just proceed with caution, bc some of these girls are... beyond just "crazy" in my opinion.

[BoopBoopBeep]

Yeah there's been a restraining order or two over the years ;) Hence why they don't know where I live or work.

[NathanDavis]

let's be honest? let's be honest then... if we're here, still at G@G... then we're all a bit crazy already

[DishLady]

True. But there's crazy in the fun, basic way and then there's Medea burning down Jason's home crazy (https://www. moaninc. co. uk/ancient-women/medea)...

[NathanDavis]

well... my houses are still intact, lol

[DishLady]

Awesome. :)

[RyanR03]

Well I imagine a lot of younger dudes here but it is NOT worth it at all and I know. It all loses its appeal when she doesn’t come home one night or the credit card goes missing. You just want a lady that know when to misbehave. That’s way more hot than a girl who is like a neon flashing sign

[SotiCoto]

It isn't a matter of quantity. It is a matter of being the same kind of crazy as me being fine, and other types of crazy (e. g. normality) not being fine.

[DishLady]

Agreed. I always use that expression "the same kind of crazy" 😂.

[hahahmm]

The thunder you hear is the sound of a billion purring cats.

If you want to get rich, invest in cat food companies because in the near future there will be an explosion in the number of women who can't get a man to take them seriously. Too many women today are self-absorbed. They invest time in looking good but not in being a good person. Looks will not get a guy to take you seriously. At least not a guy who actually has anything women want in long term/forever type situations.

[JohnK123]

Being clingy is somewhat ok bc it shows the other person wants u etc but being too clingy is crazy

[slatyb]

Too much? A disordered life. I don't know what you mean by conservative but it's not attractive to most.

[DishLady]

I'm not using "conservative" in the political sense, if that's what you mean.

[slatyb]

It's not. Usually it's a code word meaning "low sex drive"

[DishLady]

I've never heard that term as referring to sex drive. A "non-hoe" who won't just hop into bed with whomever. Does that clarify?

[LiamJHayden]

Used to be, but now I am selective and have no interest in casual.

[ticktds]

I go for what we in the biz call a "sleeper build." lol

[RHK36]

Low-key today most women are all too much. Rather stay single and fool around with hot crazies than crazy women that don't even know they're crazy.

[DishLady]

Hmm. I don't know about that... Many are, I agree, bc they fight for trendy concepts they don't fully understand, with illogical blinders on... But there are a lot of women who aren't crazy (ok, we'll say under 10% crazy)... Perhaps take the time to sort through for those ladies, no?

[Pohjolan]

If I feel that I couldn't trust her enough to leave her at my place, with my dog or with my car.

[Dongie]

I think you answered your question perfectly. You said all I had to say.

[legalboxers]

if she's normal I dont care

[DishLady]

Meaning (1) You just want a "normal" girl or (2) if she's just an average girl you don't care about her? (Sorry, I couldn't tell which...)

[legalboxers]

1) normal - no drama. sweet average.

[Staximus]

Chippies. Never heard that one before haha

[Staximus]

I'll pass on the chippies

[MrGSpotHer]

I don't know yet