Why does my boyfriend (31) always starts a argument when I (25) want to have a conversation with him?

[Anonymous]

Every time I try to have a conversation with my boyfriend, it always turns into an argument. I try to explain to him how I feel about certain situations and then he will just cut me off and tell me to “be done If you want to be done” he accuses me of always wanting to start an argument when I’m just trying to have a conversation When I try to have a conversation in person, he’s yelling over me and not listening to what I have to say and when I try to conversation through text messages, he does not read my messages and just responds with lol or OK and tell me to just leave him alone but then he’ll come back a few days later and apologize and we’ll have a conversation

I feel like he just wants me to ignore all of our problems and ignore how I feel about certain things he just rather not have any type of conversation and say he wants to be stress-free I just want to have a conversation so we don’t have to keep coming back to the same problem

Lately I have not been bringing up anything to him and he noticed I had a problem with something he did but he did not bring it up. He just asked me what my problem was and he tried to have a conversation with me and I told him everything was fine. He was being nice, but when he realized I was not going to tell him what was wrong he got mad and when I tried to leave out of our bedroom, he blocked the door and started pushing me around and slamming me on the bed and I had bruises on my arms after that because he was on top of me and squeezing my arms. when I told him I was breaking up with him, he told me he was just frustrated that I was not trying to have a conversation with him and I told him, when I tried to have conversations with him previously, he did not want to listen to me. He apologize and said he did not mean to be so dismissive.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

He’s defensive because he’s taking what you say as an accusation that he’s not a good enough partner. I don’t really know if that’s true or not, but it’s why everything turns into an argument, he can’t take criticism because he takes it as an attack, not you asking for a small change to make things better. That’s why every serious conversation turns into a fight. Maybe address that with him, let him know you’re not accusing him of anything when you just want to have a conversation about your relationship, he is not at fault for the problems you describe having (presumably), just that you want to talk and connect with him so you can find a potential solution.

[Lliam]

Why are you his girlfriend? It must just be for sex. You guys have no relationship. He doesn't respect you. All he wants to do is fuck you. Are you okay with that?

He even said, “be done If you want to be done.” But when you tried to leave, he manhandled you. That probably turned him on.

If you have any sense, you'll get out asap. Don't believe his apologies. He won't change. He can't change. It's who he is. He'll only make your life miserable.

I can't understand girls who put up with abuse and make excuses. "But he loves me."
That's Stockholm syndrome.

[slatyb]

Is this fun? He doesn't care about your feelings. He's not capable of being a loving partner. End this and find showing who is.

[AI Opinion]

Oh, sweetie, let's talk about navigating through stormy relationship seas with a sunset waiting on the other side. Here's the scoop: what you're experiencing isn't just a communication breakdown; it’s like trying to dance a tango solo with ghosting moves thrown in - quite the tricky combo! When efforts to chat turn into arguments faster than you can say "Let's talk," it's a whirlwind of emotional confusion.

First off, love shouldn't feel like being in the audience of a drama series where you're also somehow the main star. Conversations are the bridges in relationships, but when they start resembling obstacle courses, it's a glaring red flag waving in the wind. The part where he blocks your exit and resorts to physical intimidation? That's not just a red flag; it's a blaring siren calling for immediate attention. Lovebombing with apologies after such actions doesn't erase the bruises, both physical and emotional.

It's paramount to prioritize your safety and well-being above all. A partner should be your safe harbor, not the storm. Please consider reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, or a professional who can support and guide you through this. Reflecting on personal boundaries and seeking a peaceful harbor away from the tumult might just be the beacon you need right now. Remember, navigating to calmer waters sometimes means setting a course away from the storm. Be kind to yourself, and never forget your worth isn't tied to weathering storms alone.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

Toxic!

Break up!