Are happy relationships really that rare nowadays?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Everywhere I look, people are complaining about their relationships, always wondering if they could do better and are settling.

My wife and I are extremely happy with each other, we always have lots of fun together and are a steel-solid team, any argument we have we make up after a couple of hours at most, and we are extremely compatible in the bedroom and out.

Our family and friends always say "got lucky", but I don't know if that's the right way of putting it. Granted, a lot of them are divorced or jump from a relationship to the other.

[Finchie40]

Sadly it seems that way, considering divorce rates are higher than actual lasting marriage rates. Statistics show Females’ are the main reason marriages are failing ,70 percent of divorces are made by females’ filing. I honestly blame social media and technology for being a big part of the reason marriages and relationships are failing , Almost every person carries a cell phone with them with access into the internet , with apps like Snapchat and Tinder and Instagram and Facebook which makes it easy for people to be sneaky , as well as Ashley Madison , a site where married couples cheat on each other. I just watched a documentary on Ashley Madison that the site got hacked into and leaked out millions of married peoples’ information showing they were cheating on their spouse , A lot of spouses ended in divorce and a lot of them committed suicide because they were busted red handed. So it just goes to show Most people are
Selfish POS people when it comes to relationships finding true love these days is sadly hard to come by , Mainly because most people think grass is greener on the other side or they had their heart broken to many times to the point it’s harder for them to trust. Casual sex is like the new norm these days or FWB’s Most people are scared to get into a committed relationship because of shit like this. So the only way a relationship can survive , is if both people choose each other and make each other their top priority , if not? That relationship will more than likely not survive.

[CalmUntilAbused]

Well, the only speck of luck I could find here is that You actually found each other. Once this issue was taken care of, it's all about both of You making the right choices in Your married life. Arguments will always happen, but the way You deal with them proves that You are both responsible adults aware of Your mutual goals and dedicated to support each other. And once two people start working as a steel-solid team, mutual sympathy and loyalty will appear naturally.

Now, to answer that initial question of Yours... Yes, happy relationships are really ultra-rare these days. It's not due to lack of luck, however, but due to what I might call a pandemic of irresponsibility. As people go back on their promises to each other, mistrust appears and they naturally grow apart. That pandemic of irresponsibility probably has a number of causes, but the influence of mass media and specifically social media is most likely the most important one. The sheer volume of depravity easily accessed through social media is enough to corrupt most of the young, vulnerable people, and then it only gets worse. Trying to excuse their own inexcuseable behaviour, people start being dishonest with themselves and thus lose the only way out of this vicious circle.

Now... Could You tell me how You met Your wife? As I said, that's the only thing I would attribute to luck, but if there's a way to help this luck, I'd like to know it. I almost gave up on this dream of a happy family some time ago, but recently I finally regained enough of my confidence to give it another try and I would like to go for it before my motivation dissipates.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

I agree with you on the pandemic of irresponsibility nowadays. Many people just want quick satisfaction and don't want to put effort in long-lasting relationships.

My wife and I actually met in high school, she was a couple of years older than me, but we became friends and I would spend the afternoons at her house.

After high school we fell out of contact for some years and reconnected in 2019, getting married in 2021.

[CalmUntilAbused]

Well... I guess there might be some hope for me, after all. I've met the Girl I like in middle school and we later reunited a few times, but it doesn't look like she hates me, so maybe if I wait for Her to realize a few important things long enough and She won't find anyone else in the meantime, I can still make it.

[CrazyGirl2]

Sadly, the answer is likely yes! I too get the “You guys are so luck to have found each other” speech whenever we are discussing relationships with friends. I think it’s really sad that people in long-term relationships are now considered the exception, not the norm.

I blame third-wave feminism! Women are being told that we are not just equal to men, but that we are the same as men. Women started to behave like men sexually. When that happened, relationships became secondary to hookup-sex and “situationships”. Even those women in relationships, are now constantly looking for a “better man” because we are told that we are all “princesses” and deserve “the best”. However, the reality of the situation is that men benefit from the sex without strings, and women end up childless, alone and miserable! Relationships take work! You don't fall “in-love” you fall into infatuation, love is a choice, and it’s what remains after the infatuation ends.

Just my opinion.
Laura 🤗 🥰

[midnightmoon05]

Most of my surroundings are together. I don’t know how to measure their happiness.
I was happy with my first hubby.
I am happy with my hubby now.
understanding, appreciating each other is easy to do.
for others especially from gag … so many complaints, I don’t understand.

[AI Opinion]

Jumping straight into the heart of it, you and your wife sound like you've hit the relationship jackpot! But, is it really just luck? I'd argue there's more to it. In my experience, a blissful duo like you guys doesn't just stumble upon happiness; you build it brick by brick. It's about communication, mutual respect, and keeping that spark alive, whether it's through inside jokes, date nights, or just genuinely enjoying each other's company. Sure, in this swipe-right era, hearing tales of true love can seem like finding a unicorn at a horse race. But I see it this way: happy relationships aren't as rare as they seem; they're just less vocal because they're too busy enjoying each other's company! So, keep loving, keep laughing, and let those "you got lucky" comments be the chorus to your love song.

[OlderAndWiser]

I doubt that luck played any role in you finding the right partner, and I am sure that your relationship grows because of the efforts you both make for each other.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Thank you.
I think that something that helped ironically enough were the big arguments we had early on, we ironed out all the things that could bring discord to out relationship and worked on mitigating our flaws towards each other.

[NathanDavis]

not around me, which is friends and family... my neighbors, my workplace

the vast majority of the people are happy in their relationships... those few who weren't, ended their relationships... so now they're content as single or happy with someone else, lol

but this is a border... so we do move fast and we're proactive in every sense, life does not wait for you

[aquamarine321]

It’s a 50/50 or 90/10 or 40/60 etc it all depends on how you look at it because most relationships started out happy and butterflies and then days , weeks , months , years they are unhappy because of ….. plus no relationship is perfect everyone knows this …but the number one thing that makes relationships unhappy is because of lack of communication and money

[Caroline91]

I don't really think happy relationships are all that rare. Or maybe people in happy relationships tend to hang out with other people in happy relationships. Our family and friend circle is made up of a whole lot of happy relationships.

[RavVid]

Could it be you and your wife value a happy life and are willing to adapt to your separate needs and compromise so you both win?

When I suggested we compromise to a girl, she said compromise means you lose and she wasn't willing to lose. I thing that sums up why relationships are failing. She lost me at that point.

[Yannae]

They're not rare. The happy relationships, you just don't hear from them. Why would they? If they post on socual media about how great it is with all those happy pictures, they may have something to prove.
Those good relationships, you will hear little from them. The bad ones are the ones that feel the need to bark.

[dustybiker2]

Is the happy relationship rare or is the effort lacking these days.

[MicahRaine]

The latter

[dustybiker2]

My usual thoughts too

[Nikki1989]

Damn, people on here must know some really dysfunctional people. Every couple I know couldn't be happier.

[BCRanger10]

I don't know if they're "rare", but I do think that they're not as common.

[MyBrainsInsaneReign]

I think people who are in happy relationships don't spend a lot of time online.

So in internet-world, it SEEMS like happy relationships are rare.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

I don't think they're rare at all. It's just those that don't have good relationships are the ones we hear about the most.

[MicahRaine]

I know plenty of people in happy relationships.

I think the biggest two reason for failing relationship is bad communication and lack of commitment.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, but that's just because quality people are rare nowadays.

You can't link up with trash and expect it to have good results.

[Twalli]

Most people in happy relationships don't really feel the need to discuss it.

[unkissme]

You are lucky. And you’re also not immune from getting divorced later.

[MisterWack]

No, I’ve seen plenty of happy relationships they aren’t rare.

[ProbablyClueless]

They seem to quite rare, yes.

[sheenagwapa]

is it? i see a lot of sweet couples in public.

[Simslover92]

Yep.

[serious]

I think so.

[jahaims]

Yeah