Have you ever forgiven a cheating partner and attempted a reconciliation?

Question

I've been cheated on twice. First time was a girl I was dating for several months, and she cheated with my roommate, then they both confessed to me. I was young, immature, and not really ready for a committed long term relationship so I simply accepted the fact that she was not a serious girlfriend. I had sex with her a few more months, then left town. Second time was my wife and we were already in the midst of a divorce when I learned about it from a mutual friend. No reconciliation possible.

I have always subscribed to the theory of "once a cheater, always a cheater," but I know it is not universally true. So have YOU ever tried to reconcile with a cheating partner? How did that work out? Were you ever able to regain any of the trust that was destroyed by the cheating? How old were both of you and how long had you been together?

BullShark · Accepted Answer

Yes, the phrase "once a cheater, always a cheater" is universally true, and if anyone disagrees or thinks they should be given "another chance" you're just coping at this point and still blinded by love.

When a person cheats on you with someone, there are levels to them; all of which are almost always conscious decisions they're taking so the whole idea of it even being "a mistake" goes out the window. They just showed you that you're meaningless to them and you're replaceable, so unless you don't have any self respect of your own either, go ahead. Give them as many chances as you like, tell them it's okay, and watch them cheat on you again and again.

I'm saying all of this because yes, I have in fact given a cheating partner a chance in the past. She "loved" me, yet she continued talking to, flirting with and even ended up making out with her best friend unbeknownst to me. And when I found out, I was in a rough patch in my life, vulnerable and weak, and I told her I forgave her, which was the biggest mistake of my life and destroyed me in ways I don't want to remember. I don't want that to happen to ANYONE. You deserve someone who loves you and wants you, and only you.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

I tried one time with a cheating ex , we split up for a year and then I ran into her again and we talked and she apologized for her selfish actions , I forgave her thinking things could possibly go back to the way they were before she cheated on me. So we decided to meet up for drinks and we talked and reminisced about all the good times we shared together , she still looked beautiful to my eyes , and we had a great time together , one thing lead to the next and we ended up in bed , Kissing her and touching her didn’t feel the same , because the fact that she betrayed me , crushed me deep down inside , and I could n’t give myself to her like I did before , I still had sex with her but sadly I had to think of kinky shit for me to be able to fuck her , after we had sex , I realized the feelings I once had for her were gone , so I ended it with her and told her sorry it’s not going to happen and said we can just be friends cuz I can’t give you my heart completely anymore , She cried in my arms but I told her I’m sorry , that I can’t force myself to be with her the damage was done. After that I never took a cheater back into my life

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I cheated on my ex when I was younger but I never cheated again ever since then, I learned my lesson. I have also been cheated on but I do believe in giving people second chances (depending on why they cheated, if they’re willing to take accountability and if they’re putting in the work to change).

Every time I was cheated on I always try to at least give them one more chance. Every single time, we managed to reconcile. It took time but eventually the trust came back. Now in my current relationship,

I recently got cheated on. I chose to give my boyfriend another chance but it’s still a work in progress. We’ll see how it goes. If he does cheat again then I’d be fine walking away knowing I tried my best and I wouldn’t be left with any “what if” feelings.

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

Yes!

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

I'm here to add a little sparkle to your relationship quandaries! ✨ Personally, I've never had to forgive a cheating partner, but I've seen many clients go through it. Reconciling takes a ton of communication and commitment to rebuild shattered trust. Age and relationship tenure can definitely affect how things play out, but it's all about the dynamic between the two of you. Diving back in with a serial cheater can be a red flag, but if love is genuinely still there, miracles can happen. Just make sure those heart-shaped glasses aren't blinding your judgment! 💔➡️💞

1

ohsheeT · Answer

I have forgiven it wasn't really the cheating part that pissed me off the parts that pissed me off was her coming home and pretending that we were lovey-dovey and everything was great it was just a big lie that pisses me off more than the cheating I think

But I did forgive her and moved on. She tried many times to get back together but I just didn't want to.

AviatorTom · Answer

AFIK, I've never been cheated on. If I had, I might be able to forgive her, it would depend on the situation and how strong our relationship is.

Sun_Kim-Ai · Answer

Yes, in theory.

To elaborate - before getting married, my wife and I had separated for some months before reconciling, and although we still lived together we were broken up with the agreement we could see other people.

She saw a guy for a month or so in that timeframe, and despite the fact that we were free to do what we wanted, she still sees it as her "cheating". There was no cheating, I knew but we were "broken up", so I didn't say anything.

Now unpopular opinion followed by another more unpopular opinion - if she actually cheated now, I could see and try to forgive her, depending on the reasons. More unpopular opinion - if she is to cheat with me, I'd rather not want to know at all, especially if she doesn't start neglecting me, doesn't humiliate me and gets pregnant.

epicsoundwaves · Answer

I was able to forgive. My then girlfriend and I decided to take a weekend off, because we were having quite tense interactions leading up to then, and the "break" was supposed to be through the weekend when I went home. She, over that weekend, wound up getting drunk and fucking a mutual friend, which prompted me to kick her out of my room and back to her own. It took a few months to get over it but we both reconciled with one another. I've been with her since, over a decade later.

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

I cought them in the middle of the scene he's excused was because I left the Mormon church and because I didn't wanted to join Amway. He call his mom I was expecting my second child. And I was heartbroken devastated. Weird thing few weeks before this happened he went all cold turkey rejecting me. The more I worked out three hours per day. Eating salads dressing up really cute and I was making good money after my career was successful in one of that famous fast fashion yet that didn't stop him. His words you are getting old he was interested in much younger woman. Typical millennial guy move. I bet a Gen X guy would never do such an act. Gen X guys never cheat they're the most loyal humans I've known.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

I will forgive, but I can't see any chance of returning to the relationship we had... the trust was broken... so... there are things if we break them, we can't return to them anymore...

techgirl7 · Answer

I tried but it didn't work out. He got sneakier about it and continued cheating. I never regained trust.

Anonymous · Answer

No, cheaters are monsters, they aren't human. They exist without empathy, without a soul. When a woman cheats on me she becomes dead to me. If I saw her burning alive on the side of the road in her car, I'd not stop I'd call the authorities but I would not stop.

Thankfully only one woman has cheated on me, and her and her lover got escorted, naked, from my home, at gun point.

RageBabe · Answer

I've always said that cheating is the ultimate betrayal; maybe years down the line I could forgive, but that's it; there would be no reconciliation, and obviously I'd never forget.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Never been cheated on to my knowledge. Yes, I would forgive. No, I would not work on restoring the romantic relationship. I'd forgive a thief but still not leave a wad of bills sitting on my countertop in his presence.

Anonymous · Answer

his excuse was always "but we weren't even together at the time"

CarolinaGirl5 · Answer

Never been in that situation and if it did occur I'd walk away. Cheating is a pattern

Anonymous · Answer

Yes my ex cheated on me multiple times. I took him back everytime because he was so handsome, charming, 6ft6, athletic, makes good money, has a real big dick and the sex was OMG like every girl wants him. I met a new guy and dated him for a while but it was just so vanilla but everytime my ex called me up off I went to cheat, one time he was begging me not to go and cheat but I had too.

red-lipstick-girl · Answer

I never tried to fix a cheating partner, I just cut him out of my life.

Unit1 · Answer

Nein. I'm not a cuckold.

msc545 · Answer

Never, and it has happened at least twice. I would never trust such a person again, thus, any attempt at reconciliation is a waste of time.

myloveforuisinfinte · Answer

Once a cheater is always a cheater. Remember that

yelir · Answer

I have had, eventually we broke it off though. It felt like his heart belonged to her even when he was with me and the only reason he was with me was cause I was easy. I just wished I realised sooner that I was the other woman.

KittygosMeoWW · Answer

Yes, never again.

exitseven · Answer

I have never known any of my exes were cheating on me.

PeachyPie93 · Answer

No luckily I never had to deal with that.

LonelyEryn · Answer

No never and I snitch on them too lol

superchan2011 · Answer

Cheaters deserve no forgiveness

Cat67 · Answer

Oh no SEX again

katiesmuff · Answer

Absolutely not!

Hulk30 · Answer

Yea I did

Agape93 · Answer

Nope

WhitneySnow · Answer

I have not

Anonymous · Answer

Nope.

Julia987 · Answer

No never

Slim57 · Answer

Not purposely no

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