:/
+1 yDo you think you can forgive him? I could forgive my partner for cheating on me, but would I stay with them? Absolutely not. The fact that he was keeping it a secret from you makes it even worse.
The relationship will not be the same again... why don't you want to leave him? If the trust is gone, how could you be in a happy marriage with him? Being single is WAY better than being stuck in a miserable marriage. If you stay with him for the sake of your daughter, it is going to affect her tremendously too. Did he feel remorse for what he did?
But... you should do what you want to do. Do you think your relationship can recover from this?
03 Reply- +1 y
I mean I still love him more than anything and I don’t know if I’m ready to let him go. And at this point starting over sounds overwhelming…like having to find a new place on my own which I could probably barely afford (we just moved into a new apartment too), the proceeds of divorce sounds like a lot, and like you mentioned he raised my daughter with me and she loves him more than anything so I don’t wanna take him away from her.
And I think having trust is gonna be hard for a while but I might be willing to try.
I wish he never even told me to be honest 😭 I was happy being blissfully unaware.. - +1 y
Do you want to try couples counseling?
- +1 y
Yeah that’s what I’ve been thinking
Most Helpful Opinions
- 1.1K opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yThat's unforgivable. Not only the fact he betrayed his partner but he kept it a secret. However, I wonder why would a man confess something he got away with - maybe it's his own twisted way to make you end things with him.
04 Reply- +1 y
I don’t think he’s trying to get me to end it. I told him I needed some time to think about things and I wasn’t sure what this meant for us and he seemed upset that I was thinking about leaving.
The person he slept with is actually someone I know and used to work with and I found out from someone else a couple months ago. When I asked him he told me it was before we were together and I believed him. So I think he’s just telling me now cause he feels guilty about lying about it just a couple months ago. - +1 y
Oh, so it was before you got together? This changes everything.
- +1 y
No. He told me at first it was before we were together but he lied. Then he confessed that it was after
- +1 y
Before you make any decisions, answer me this: would you be able to trust him ever again?
+1 yJesus christ you people are horrible , it's just a massage of the genitalia. What is wrong with you in which your partner to whom you probably said you cared for , enjoying themselves without you? Its no different that having a non genitalia massage , why do you care so much? They are not your property and you cannot own people. Get over yourself oppressor , who cares if your partner had a pleasant relaxing day? You should and obviously you're psychotic for punishing them. If you really loved and respect your partner you would want them to enjoy life instead of locking them up as your personal slave.
19 Reply- +1 y
Bro what are you talking about
- +1 y
Say that when you're the one being cheated on.
- +1 y
You people are insane , why won't you be happy for your partner when they are enjoying themselves without you?
- +1 y
trolololol
who let you out? - +1 y
@420Rachel Lmao
- +1 y
No, it's dealing with a trust being betrayed. You may not care enough to stay true to your partner, that's on you. Most of the ones who are responding clearly do understand.
- +1 y
That’s one way of avoiding ever experiencing any heart break, to just look at sex as meaningless. It’s also a good way to never experience what it’s like to truly be in love with someone. I’m no prude and I have had sex for no other reasons than pleasure plenty of times, but the best is when you have a bond with someone and trust each other. It’s one thing if you go into a relationship with an agreement, but it’s pretty screwed to betray someone that trusts you.
So as edgy as you think your answer might be and the few minions that agreed with you, you’re not cool. Kinda pathetic really.
- 680 opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yI’d want to start with his motivation to confess that he cheated on you. I’m not defending him but it doing so he must have considered that it may end your relationship so that might be a good place to start. I think you are reacting very well. The question really is are you the sort of person / couple of ho can come back from this and perhaps more importantly.. do you want to?
01 Reply- +1 y
I think I do want to come back from it. I wish he never even told me to be honest.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
19Opinion
7.2K opinions shared on Relationships topic. And kept it secret all that time? Hell no. That's even worse than confessing right away.
00 Reply
+1 yI chose no but really started thinking about it. You should want to get to a place in life where you can forgive everyone who has wronged you. I'm a true believer in that. But my twist on that and also the reason I jumped on the no answer is you don't have to forget it. We have to remember we are all humans and all humans fuck up. We should be able to forgive people for being human. But don't forget what they did. You can't make a hoe a housewife. If they are a piece of shit once, they are going to be a piece a shit again. Forgive them but don't stay with them. If you can find it in you to forgive them, you will carry a whole lot baggage with you for years. Drop the bitch and drop the extra baggage. just don't let them do it to you again.
00 Reply
+1 yI can forgive, but never forget. The only question that would arise with that long to confession, would be why the wait, and where is the communication? Anything can be worked through, except lies and deceived living. I would be more hurt that my partner can’t talk to me about something as serious as losing complete respect and integrity for a quick hit-it-and-quit-it. For that alone, I would have to take a step back and do me.
30 Reply- 4.6K opinions shared on Relationships topic.
m +1 yyes, I would forgive them and twice... for both of those mistakes
it would be forgiveness given though, and then some understanding as well...
but the relationship would still be over, and done as a relationship, things would change dramatically and they would not go back to be "the same"
but I do forgive10 Reply Being a woman who forgave and took a man back after cheating on me more times than I should have and looking back now and seeing the consequences that I had to suffer from that, please don't do it. Even if you do forgive them, you may think you're over it but that hurt will always be there subconsciously.
10 Reply
+1 yI actually talked about this with my fiancé because we had issues a while back and he was getting a little too cozy with his coworkers. I asked him to be honest now so we can work through it before marriage; he swears that nothing happened, and I believe him. However, if it comes out that something did happen and we're years into marriage with children, I would take us to marriage counselling first to see if we can work through it; if not then divorce.
10 ReplyI almost voted "no" but then I voted "I don't know" bc I have not had this happen and it might depend somewhat on the situation, for example if we were not serious a couple years ago and we are serious now, that might help me forgive him, but honestly I doubt I could. Even if I wanted to I doubt it. Sorry this happened :(
00 ReplyI could forgive them. But they wouldn’t be my partner anymore. It took you this long for you to confess? What else have you been up to? These would be my thoughts. I wouldn’t be able to trust them at all anymore. Cheaters get the boot!
10 ReplyHard to say but honestly I don’t think there is a big chance of that.
Personally speaking one of my core values is loyalty, if you don’t want to be with me sure it will hurt but it’s honest I can respect that.
Cheating I cannot.00 Reply
+1 yI wouldn't be able to forgive or stay with someone that thought it was not only ok to lie, but act like it was nothing for a year or more. Relationships are built on trust before love. You can't have love where truth doesn't exist first.
10 Reply
+1 yI would forgive her having done that. And I advise you to forgive him too. The incident happened years ago. It does not have direct Impact on your relationship today. He trusted you telling you the truth.
If you need to punish him before forgiving him then do it (kicking balls, habanero on his penis or a month in chastity belt) and at last forgive him!00 Reply789 opinions shared on Relationships topic. it doesn't matter whether they confessed immediately, confessed later or never confessed at all. once cheating occurs, there's no way around it.
best thing to do is to NOT cheat in the first place.
00 Reply- 707 opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yDepends on what you mean by "forgive". It would take a lot of work, but eventually I'd forgive what he did. It'd still be the end of our marriage and I'd never trust him again.
10 Reply 301 opinions shared on Relationships topic. Yes I would forgive him, but I wouldn't stay with him. The trust would be completely gone and I would feel like our relationship from that point, was a lie.
00 Reply
+1 yWhat that would tell me was that he gave himself permission to cheat a couple years ago and then lied about it for the next couple years. That is worse than fresh cheating.
00 Reply
+1 yHey, is the if she's still seeing him after telling me I would tell her to get out of my house and live with the person she's seeing but sometimes I'm a Really forgiving guy bc I'm kinda soft on women in general I respect them my culture and I'm a really soft kind of guy, but it doesn't take much to make me explode
00 ReplyWould I forgive him yes. Would I stay with him no. It wastes too much energy to hold on to resentment or hurt by what he did. But he’s broken that trust and it’s not something he’ll be able get back.
00 Reply- 546 opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yforgiving and still beinh with the person isn't the same. i can forgive but I don't know if i wanna e with the prsn or not
00 Reply
+1 ySure I can forgive, but forgiveness doesn't mean the relationship isn't over.
10 Reply
+1 yI'd forgive him but am him to describe everything to me with all the filthy details
02 Reply- 807 opinions shared on Relationships topic.
u +1 yNo. It’s bad enough that they cheated, but then they lied about it for so long? That’s unforgivable.
00 Reply no and it would be over the same day they decided to tell me
00 Reply- 738 opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yHail to the naw!!!
Forgiveness excludes the necessary consequences to compel meaningful changes.00 Reply 6.4K opinions shared on Relationships topic. I would be amazed. Anything is possible but that seems incredibly unlikely.
00 ReplyNo, Because that’s not how it works.
00 Reply
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yAccording to Quantum Mechanics the past doesn’t exist. Reality isn’t even real so that partner is an imaginary specie with a dick
00 Reply1.1K opinions shared on Relationships topic. I was cheated on and never felt
so disrespected. mover so betrayed. I don’t think i’d ever trust her00 Reply- 2.6K opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yI will forgive them, but not trust them to be my partner.
00 Reply I've not yet had a relationship that even made it to one year.
00 Reply
+1 yFirst I would go out and cheat on them then I would decide if I wanted to continue the relationship or not
00 ReplyI would vanish from their life immediately and permanently
00 ReplyNo, because how could I ever trust them again?
00 Reply
+1 yWhy he told you this thing after several years? What was his intention? I think you should find his intention after this.
00 ReplyI don't think I could trust him.. especially since he kept it from me for so long
00 Reply409 opinions shared on Relationships topic. Depends on the situation…maybe, maybe not
00 Reply4.1K opinions shared on Relationships topic. Fuck no. Betray me and you're done.
00 Reply- 1.1K opinions shared on Relationships topic.
+1 yNo, and it already took him Years to confess it.
00 Reply Omg absolutely not is that what happened to you
00 Reply
+1 yThey would lose my trust
00 Reply
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yNo. I am not a degenerate cuckold.
00 ReplyMaybe.
20 Reply
s +1 ynope
00 Reply991 opinions shared on Relationships topic. Of course... NOT❤️
00 ReplyHonestly no !
00 Reply
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