How should I act when a woman unfriended me?

[Anonymous]

• We had been friends on social media for about 6 years. Both married, have families etc.

I must have misread the signals at work from her, I started making posts about things I liked, slowly open myself up. Nothing inappropriate but sharing thoughts, dreams aspirations etc. To test what I thought from those signals.

This person liked nearly all my posts, until the last 6 months or so. Then no matter what she never interacted. I kept posting things to get a reaction. What used to get an immediate like or comment sudden radio silence. I know she seen them because sometime she would ask about something not directly talking about the post, but something similar.

It's been over 2 months of no online friendship but this entire time since the unfriending, she doesn't act any differently towards me and still comes up and chats with me at work as if nothing ever happened.

I was scared that I would get into some workplace trouble because you know, she is the boss and I'm just a lowly coworker. I was expecting to get called in few days and weeks after that happened... but it's been two months now and nothing has happened. Infact she actually seems more happy around me these days. And I've done nothing different either. I just pretend it doesn't bother me.

I think some boundaries got crossed. (Its the only thing I can think of) or the woman returns the feelings? I really want to apologize and try again as I truly did love that woman. Not in a derogatory sense but with warmth. This time respecting boundaries and being a friend on social media. I'm nervous to bring it up though. do you think she will give me second chance?

[AI Opinion]

Ah, love in the workplace, the ultimate plot twist! It sounds like there might have been some mixed signals and miscommunication. Since she hasn't changed her behavior at work, it might be that she's just setting boundaries on social media while keeping things friendly in person. Approaching her with an apology might be the perfect step. Just express that you value the professional dynamic and are eager to keep interactions comfortable. 🤓 Remember, respecting boundaries is essential, and actions speak louder than social media likes! Keep being your awesome self and let things unfold naturally. 🌟

[Asker]

Well I took the advice and last week in a meeting it was going well. To me, it felt like an opening where she says is there anything else we need to talk about emphasizing the word else.
I said yes there is actually. I said I want to apologize to you. She had an inquisitive look and cheerfully said what for? I'm thinking oh crap no turning back now. Probably was turning every shade of red and felt like i could cry but I didn't.
I said I want to apologize for anything you might have seen on social media. She replies okay.
I went on to say that I wanted to make it right with her. She replied again okay. And if we could be friends again.

She went onto say... well that she had been talking some courses and decided to not have friends in the work area and they aren't friends with anyone in there.

Some spill about manager employee etc. Somebody might think something if they see it etc. (Even though posts were in general nobody ever know who they were about).
She said its nothing personal (said it like 3 times during the conversation)
I replied whew it's a weight off my shoulders. She's like what? Huh?
No that's all that is.
Nothing personal.
The meeting ended kind of in a hirry with her daying well ibhave tonrun down the hall heat my lunch. It was good talking to you, seeya later! Got up and left with me still in her office.

Mind you I was able to see this person's list and they are at least friends with 4 people in there. Just not me now. Hard to believe it isn't personal. I'm not mad just a little bothered buts okay. Least I know a little more than what I did.

[Asker]

She did though say she appreciated me saying something though acknowledging the make it right part.

[Asker]

Few days later she asks me about work and seemed okay acting as if nothing happened. So to break the ice again she was eating a snack and I said whatcha eating? She immediately jumps in surprise and quickly covers and closes the bowl explaining what she brought and what she was eating all giddy acting.
I mention that I like that flavor too and she's like oh really then I ask if she like some other food if she ever tried it, she's like no, is it any good? Started asking questions about it. Complete night and day difference in the tone between work and excitement of me simply asking about food lol. At least I can feel at peace because the apology has been said and is known now. i can sleep at night.

[Asker]

Well it seems that other people are being unfriended too now. So in a way, I do feel better. But at the same time, a complete fool for that day for coming forward and offering an apology
She probably thought what in the world is he talking about.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Maybe she just got tired of seeing your posts. There's not much you can do about it other than just move on in your life. She seems to be cordial which is good, but she obviously unfriended for a reason and hasn't asked about it since. I don't think there is a way of recovering from it though. Certainly not a relationship in a romantic way.

[Asker]

I don't have a lot of time left as our building will likely be closing next year and may never see her again. I feel like I could genuinely cry. I might actually when I finally do come clean and ask why what happened. I'm certain I will. I can't stand the thought I wronged someone and they are mad. It stems from a young age.
I want to make things right with this woman. Was a stupid thing cost me her friendship. I'm gonna tell her that too.

Yeah, thats what im going through right now. The lady is probably going about her life just fine without me. Yes she's cordial and we talked on the phone about thirty minutes this week on a 1x1 Skype meeting. (she was at home recovering from a surgery). Never brought the social media up a lot. she explained to me all about the surgery after I asked how her time off was. Said she really didn't enjoy it to be honest.

I told her that I was sorry and hoped she felt better and I was thinking about her. She says aww. And I really appreciate it thank you so much! It means a lot.
We hung up on a high note and you can hear the happiness in her voice despite her not feeling well.
Truth is I feel empowered like I can take on the world when I do talk to her. I'm a good mood the rest of the day.
Very few people have that effect but she does.

[Nikki1989]

Social media is meaningless. You have been wasting your time all along.

[Asker]

I see. Like I said in the original question, I could have swore I read the signals just fine. Lingering should touch nearby. Hair adjusting (when I was the only one in the room) etc. So I acted. Slowly and surely over the course of two years. Everything seemed like it was going well. Not sure what happened?