Do you believe that we are born to love and learn how to hate or born to hate and learn how to love?

[sage2021]

[FenixG45]

Born to love but learn how to hate!

[FenixG45]

Thank you for MHG!

[LiamJHayden]

Born to love.

[Finchie40]

I was raised to love and to find a girl that values me the same way I value her, but unfortunately I ended up with some selfish girls’ that only cared about themselves , so I realized love can be temporary , not all love lasts forever. People claim they want love and want to fall in love , but the second they receive it from someone , they push them away because they are damaged or broken and most of all Selfish, I realized selfish people will never experience true love , because all they love is themselves, they do not know how to give the same way they want to receive , they just want to receive without giving. and sacrificing in return. Selfish people think grass is greener on the other side , the second they get bored or not feel like they are not getting their way , they run to someone else thinking that someone else is going to save them , not realizing that someone else is just using them to get off , because that someone knows they are a rebound. I been with a handful of lying married women that were cheating on their husbands with me , thinking I was going to save them and love them the way they deserved to be loved and treated , because things at home with their husbands wasn’t going great , so instead of fixing what was broken in their marriage , they ran to someone else because they were selfish females’ that only cared about themselves. Not realizing the second I found out she was lying to me about being married , I no longer wanted anything to do with her. So finding someone today that will love you until the end , that is loyal and honest with you , is sadly hard to find these days , because most people in general are selfish. If you can’t remove selfishness for your partner , don’t expect them to remove it for you , it needs to go both ways for any relationship to survive and for love to continue to grow between you both. The only way someone should leave a relationship is if they are being physically and mentally abused , or they are being lied to and cheated on. Other than that Fix your relationship and stop being selfish

[sage2021]

When I read your opinion I had to think back when did these women become so selfish?
It's so different these days then when I was searching for love. I found love when I was 20 and we were married 6 weeks later. We were married for 4 years and have a son together. But when he got out of the Navy all these women were chasing after him and I guess now that you mention it, he was selfish because he left me and our new baby son and went for the other women. This was in 1978.
Perhaps people have always been selfish. I remember writing a real, actual letter 💌 to Dear Abby who had a popular newspaper column asking her about a boy who I liked and couldn't keep. She wrote back and said that some people always think that the grass is greener on the other side. Her words exactly. This is when I was in high school in 1971. And here you are saying the exact same thing in 2025!

I don't have any answers anymore Finch. It seems like it's the same old Merry-go-round - just a different horse.

[Finchie40]

Yea everyone of us has selfishness inside of ourselves , through all my years being in relationships with girls’ that ended up breaking my heart all pretty much stemmed down from selfishness. Thinking grass is greener on the other side , I am not saying I am perfect but one thing I can honestly say about myself is that I value relationships, I don’t get into a relationship with a girl that I plan on breaking her heart , I get into a relationships with her hoping our hearts grow together forever. But sadly that didn’t always pan out the way I wanted it to be, because of selfishness , Not only did I experience selfish girls’ I witnessed plenty of other relationships that ended due to selfishness , whether he or she was the selfish partner in the relationship, partners that were cheating on their partner and then going back to them. Like nothing happened claiming they love their partner , when really the only love themselves and what they can benefit from that relationship, Sadly so much cheating and affairs occurred through the years to the point it’s harder to trust people. I have witnessed relationships ending for the silliest reasons , When I use to work as a bouncer at a popular bar , they shit I witnessed in there blew my mind and my whole outlook on relationships changed by witnessing all the cheating that took place , Girls’ night wasn’t innocent behavior same as guys’ night even before I worked as a bouncer and I was single and going to bars and clubs and vacations to the beach with friends’ having a good time , there was always a girl or guy that lied about their relationship status and cheating on their partners’ with either me or my friends’ But have this selfish mindset that they tell themselves , what my partner doesn’t know, doesn’t hurt? Making excuses for their selfish behavior. Most people do not end a relationship before hooking up with someone else , people claim they do , but most of them don’t , it’s just smoke being blown up everyone’s’ asses

[Finchie40]

To make themselves seem like they are innocent when really they are a POS. I can’t tell you how many girls’ I hooked up with that ended up confessing that she was in a relationship until after we hooked up or had sex , and then telling me , she isn’t happy in her relationship, her boyfriend or husband treats her like shit , I would think ok? Then why are you still with him then if that’s how horrible he is to you? Because she is selfish and looking for someone to save her before she ends things with her partner. Some of them go back home and act like nothing happens , it just blows my mind on how selfish and pathetic a lot of people are in this world. I use to value love and relationships and loyalty when I met a beautiful girl that I hit it off with , now I won’t even consider a commitment with a girl until her and I have been together for awhile and we both see the big picture , because I am over having my heart shit on by a girl that changes her mind , or a girl that is bored comparing her life to others’ thinking that’s where she deserves to be. Pretty much what my wife did to me after 20 years of marriage , the kids’ are older now so she decides she no longer wants to be tied down and pretty much wants to become a whore weighing her options with other guys’ etc. for a long time I tried saving our marriage but all it did , was write Sucker on my head thinking Love would save the day , to realize I was just wasting my time , giving to someone that was r giving back the same in return. Departing from her was hard but it was the best decision I made for myself because I wasn’t loved anymore , I was used. When I finally met another girl , this girl treated me like Gold and made me realize how much time I wasted on saving a relationship with a selfish girl. When my wife saw I was happy and being treated the way I deserved to be treated , she was jealous and wanted me back , I Laughed and said No fucking way in Hell , the trust we once had for each other is

[Finchie40]

Gone, she begged and begged for me back and stupid me haha e her another chance thinking maybe she does love me , thinking maybe we can save our marriage , things were great again for awhile until her selfishness shined again , and now we are back to debating on whether to save this marriage or not , She tries to manipulate me and tries to make me the bad guy when she is the POS , Now that her manipulation isn’t working on me , she does t know what to do , I told her I am complete fine if she wants to leave , because I am looking for love not looking to be used

[Surely]

I believe that you are mostly born neutral. But you learn which way you fall by your surroundings.

[NathanDavis]

we're animals... we're social ones

we're born to socialize and to get along to get ahead

[sawno]

I believe in both, we are born to transform but the starting point and destination are unique.

[ilistengood]

If those are my choicesthen born to love

[serious]

I think the answer is neither.

[exitseven]

no, we are born to do neither.

[yk9998]

I don't believe theories like that.