What are some hard truths you’ve realised as you’ve gotten older about life, people, yourself or relationships?

Question

Few of the realisations I’ve had are:
1. No one really cares or thinks about you as much as you do.

2. Life goes on. Whether you lose someone literally or metaphorically, you may miss them for a while but ultimately life doesn’t stop for anyone.

3. Your choices are a reflection of the love you have for yourself and others.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

1. Love especially unconditional doesn’t exist.
2. People will use you more than care about you if you let them.
3. If someone isn’t trying to be better, you’ll have to be better for them, if you want them in your life. This includes work and personal relationships.
4. True maturity is rare in every scenario.
5. Wisdom is often encourage over discipline. Even though discipline / accountability is a sign of wisdom.
6. Boundaries are ok its the people that have problems with them that are the problem. Holding others accountable for pushing your boundaries is also holding yourself accountable. I think this was the hardest lesson to actually learn for me as I was raised without them to the point that I was my own worst enemy.

MannMitAntworten · Accepted Answer

Death comes to us all. It didn’t really set in till suddenly losing my parents. I mean, I always knew, but somehow that cemented the reality.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Ah, those hard truths! 😅 As a relationship guru, I can relate to your realizations. Life's like a sassy soap opera sometimes! One nugget I've learned is that expectations are like those surprise plot twists—you can't predict them, and they sometimes hit you where it hurts. People are complex, and self-awareness is a lifelong journey. Falling in love is exhilarating, but also, communication is key. Not everyone is equipped with the right toolbox for healthy relationships, and red flags? Oh, they're real! 🛑 Keep exploring life and love with humor and curiosity. It does get better, I promise! 😉📚

BullShark · Answer

You will always be loved conditionally. There will always be a reason why someone is drawn to you/attracted to you/friends with you. Always. Trust isn't something you can build overnight through just some talking. And once it's broken, it's nearly impossible to rebuild again. Speaking the truth can sometimes sound "mean" or "hurtful", but it can make or break a relationship over the long run. If you see something you MUST point out to help them better themselves, DO IT! Before it's too late. No one gender is bad and out to ruin you, neither is either one better than the other. Shitty people don't have a gender. Same for good ones. They just are. Age does matter, but it does not always mean maturity. Your life experiences are what damage you, and also shape you into the man/woman you are. If you feel like a decision you make may entail a negative outcome for your relationship with your S/O, just don't do it. Or discuss it with them first and see what they really think, but never EVER risk it. Treat your partner like how you want to be treated yourself; with the same level of devotion, respect and dignity. Don't be mad when someone reflects the same energy you give them. Wait at least a few months of being in a relationship to tell someone you love them. Even if you already think you love them, save it for the right moment and make a mental checklist of all the things you love about them before telling them (preferably not just about their body but subtle things nobody else notices about them). If you're in love with a close friend, the feelings aren't easy to hide, and you feel like it's conflicting with your overall relationship with them, just tell them. Better to let them know and see what they think instead of overthinking and creating fake scenarios in your head which may never happen. Can it ruin your friendship? Possibly. But it can also blossom it into something more!

Finchie40 · Answer

I learned that cheating and affairs happen more than I use to think it did and realized selfishness is one of the biggest relationship killers , I learned that we all have selfishness inside of ourselves , and if we can’t remove it for our partner, don’t expect them to remove it for you. I also learned that most people get into relationships for the wrong reasons , mainly because they both didn’t see the big picture before committing to each other , they were just infatuated with each other , why I no longer rush into a committed relationship with a girl , until her and I really Get to know each other, because people change their minds constantly and don’t really
Know what they want , they just assume they know what they want. I will date girls’ and possibly be FWB’s with some strings attached hoping her and I are on the same path of eventually being committed to each other , but unfortunately it doesn’t always go that way , so FWB’s with some strings attached kind of eliminates the both of you from having your heart broken if one of you decides this isn’t what you want. At least the 2 of you can remain friends’ without hating each other. FWB’s with some strings attached only works if both people are honest with each other , without honesty that relationship won’t survive period

Genie23 · Answer

1. We tend to waste a lot of time thinking about what if and what we could have done to prevent something that happened in the past rather than focus on present and prepare for tomorrow. People often waste their time being scared than to even attempt something they really want or need. I'm one of those people as I've been afraid of failure.

2. That people aren't going to be with you forever. Whether they're your family, friends or your partner. Some will leave you, some will force you to leave them. You'll unfortunately have to face the loss of your loved ones too. So, don't depend on anyone or you'll feel lost.

3. Just love isn't enough.. other things matters too. Love requires lot of efforts otherwise you'll eventually fall out of love.

Simslover92 · Answer

As much as you may want to, you can't go back in time and fix what was broken and you can't fast forward into the future to see what will be. You only have the here and now so be in the present moment. Don't dwell on either the past or the future.

Learn from your mistakes to build a better future for yourself.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Answer

Whether you are happy or unhappy, this too shall pass.  Enjoy the moment, because tomorrow is not guaranteed.  Stand up for yourself, that’s all you’ve got.

ohsheeT · Answer

We are powerful spiritual energy , and if we guide ourselves the right direction , we can have it all watch this till the end

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Most people will never change.

sage2021 · Answer

There are no guarantees when it comes to love and even marriage.

That women have changed into men haters, want to be empowered but when they are dead, what good did they do for the human race? They die alone without any family and that's because they hate men. They are the opposite of what God designed them to be.

Honesty IS the best policy and I have been and always continue to be honest and not lie. It's not that hard hard - just don't do it!

The newest one is that I wish to God I hadn't taken Tylenol while I was pregnant with my son. He was born with learning disabilities that didn't allow him to have any of his desires come true. I'm sorry as he'll for that.

Don't let any doctor tell you "It's all in your head" when you know damn well you are really sick. Tell them they missed too much school and need to start over!

AvaRay · Answer

Not everyone who smiles at u has good intentions..

People mirror their own fears, not your worth..

Love without respect is a lesson, not a loss..

Comfort can be mistaken for passion, stability can be mistaken for boredom..

Time n energy r the most valuable currency spend them wisely, never begging for anyone’s approval..

Life teaches u that your peace, standards, n alignment r non negotiable..

Those who truly matter will rise to meet u while the rest simply fade..

Agape93 · Answer

1. The ones of authority and power, don't give a shit about you and will not help you. You're on your own.

2. There's nothing in me, so I have to put up a mask and pretend so people don't get scared.

3. There's nothing wrong with not wanting kids.

aaron13547 · Answer

Only 3 things matter in this world How much you loved How gently you lived  How gracefully you let go of things not meant for you

Seazon · Answer

People do what they want. No matter what you do or dont, say or give... it never flipping matters. The action, the drive and passion you display never matters. Except it should for yourself. FOR YOU ONLY, IT NATTERS. YOUR CHILDREN AND EVEN PET. IT MATTERS.
You be you for you and the ones that mean and count the highest-ranking for love and gratitude. No strings attached except give what is given, show up and stay.
The good finish las as they sayt because they are the best. The best never have to begin. Cause they already won

dwreborn · Answer

Always communicate with your partner about anything and everything especially things that can affect the relationship. Feelings sometimes are a hard thing to express but is a must if you dont they tend to cause resentment. Even effort on all subjects involved with relationship and never ever avoid any of these if you avoid anything to do with relationships it may be to late to fix them when you could've much earlier and much easier

lightbulb27 · Answer

Change is guarantees. Accept that.
People resist change… love them, but accept they may not accept the challenge.
We all gonma die… question is what we do w our moments and whats next.
Our beliefs dictate how we respond in the moment.
The chicken crossed the road because they wanted to.

DonaldDarko · Answer

That despite being intelligent, creating amazing technology, delving into deep philosophy. Humanity is still has an animal nature. So much of it is so predictable, right out of Romer's Vertebrate Paleontology. It's depressing and disgusting. Surly existence must be more than dull calculus, gears, wheels, boring cables around boring pullies doing boring predictable things. Surely we're more than just another AI.

anon1903 · Answer

1. My interests do not matter. I should abandon humanity and become a robot and serve the corporate world.

2. I'm scared of cats.

3. Regional movies are actually quite good.

4. It's me and my sticker collection against the world.

5. People date, marry and have children so they aren't isolated for life. Coping mechanism. Deep down, I always knew this one.

6. Cute boys are dumb. As long as they're sincere, I'll take them.

7. Internet is vast. Most is garbage. You gotta know the right places to feel like yourself again

8. Taylor Swift sucks now

9. How to get ink stain off (solution is sanitizer)

DrPepper12 · Answer

No matter the stimuli this is my path to clarity & acceptance.

Initial analysis & testing:

This is false

This is unproductive

This is ignorable

If the first three statements yield undesired or incomplete answers then I use this reasoned logic after reflection:

This is temporary

This is universal

This is survivable

Namaste!

What are some hard truths you’ve realised as you’ve gotten older about life, people, yourself or relationships?

Billlewis · Answer

I can add a couple more, if you like, although I think you've covered most of it.

-- the world revolves around three things, but it's only socially acceptable to talk about the first two... 1. Money 2. Sex 3. Jealousy.

-- I believe that popularity, and remaining close to ones friends is likely more important to women than it is to most men. This is particularly noticeable regarding political disagreements, in my opinion.

Ironco · Answer

You are wise for your age.  The sooner you learn these things the easier and better life becomes. You are on your own in life, just at times you have passengers along for the ride.

Zionne · Answer

People will often let you down and you can’t control their actions. Time keeps moving no matter what happens in your life. How you treat yourself and others shows your true values.

mysteriousNicholas · Answer

Rude-people. 👀 😶

I've summarised better than even Jesus and 600+ old commandments into two commandments.

I've summarised all the world's daily ill's, daily problems and daily shortcomings and daily predicaments: the multi-tude of rude-people outnumbering kind people, lol, on the daily. 😶‍🌫️

Shrug flip 🙃

Anonymous · Answer

In the present moment I have many people who care about me but no one to "care for me".

The little things bring me joy.

Dating is more complicated as get older. Many men are emotionally immature and behind in life.

Im happier now then I was in my 20s.

I choose to stay private about my life and struggles.

My cat is one of the main reasons I have not left this physical world.

exitseven · Answer

i always say thet there are no shortcuts in life. life is not fair and hookups will not make you happy.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Some people really are miserable sods that can't be helped.

Meatballs · Answer

Yeah I just posted about girls posting their bodies for all these sleaze bad guys do that thing over and they're young they're like 16 18 years old they're like 40 to 50 come on now don't you self respect for yourself ladies

Joshydavid25 · Answer

I realized how selfish people truly are and that someone to help you through life and to be there for you through is a diamond in the rough..

loveslongnails · Answer

What I've learned: "Almost everything I knew was wrong. Not all of it, but a damn lot of it, and the better part of it was TAUGHT to me that way."

Iron_Man · Answer

People are very selfish. It seems like they move on from person to person to get things out of them and there’s plenty of fair Weather Friends

Kelly6 · Answer

@pearl222 very true solid facts. 1 and 2 and same as what i learned

razor97 · Answer

Work is really tough and you're forced to stand up all day long. Bosses abuse their power whenever there's some unspecified rule. Companies are usually our greatest enemy

AngryCarl2 · Answer

People change. Your idea of a person is not who that person is.

Jay-_- · Answer

This is a very loaded question. I don't want to write a whole essay. 😭

katiesmuff · Answer

I would say those three pretty much top any list.

qwerty2469 · Answer

Nothing. Hard people think life is weak. The hardships baby backed bitches complain about are like Tuesday to us. Forgotten by Wednesday.

Sam1133 · Answer

(1) money is not less then god. (2) forever comes with expiry dates.

Anonymous · Answer

That I really don't have any luck in love, and that my life actually sucks.

insatiable_curiosity · Answer

My hat is off to you. Well done!

blondfrog · Answer

That everyone is shallow to some degree.

Eleni6_ · Answer

Do what make you happy. Only one life to live.

DryGermanGuy · Answer

Hear, hear! 👏

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