Why is my husband meeting up with women to "network"?

[Anonymous]

My husband is very successful executive at a large company and many people contact him on linkedin or by email for professional purposes. He recently told me he's having lunch with some woman that recently moved to the city, that is working at his former company (also a large company) and she messaged him on Linkedin asking for advice. I looked her up and she is VERY pretty. Like a model or something. I don't get why he needs to meet her in person for lunch and not over zoom? She isn't at his current company. He gets nothing out of this - just helping some beautiful woman with no friends in town? I feel uncomfortable about it. He meets loads of people on zoom - never heard of him going to lunch with someone he doesn't know but he did tell me about it. Should I say something? Is it normal or am I being insecure?

[beenherebefore]

This certainly sounds weird and it would also make me uncomfortable if I were in your shoes. But also if he has second intentions why would he be so honest about grabbing lunch with another woman? I think you should tell him how this makes you feel.

[Asker]

He didn't say who it was - I checked. He said he is having a business lunch and he kept saying "they" and "them" not "he" so I looked into his calendar on his computer when he was out of the room and saw her details then looked her up on linkedin and saw how stunning she was and also younger and less senior. What does she even have to offer to network? She is not an executive like him. She is a few levels down from him. Just pretty and maybe in 10 years she will be where he is

[beenherebefore]

You really need to tell him what you've seen and how it made you feel.

[Asker]

Can I ask what you think of him having coffee with her and not telling her he just joined her same company? She messaged him at first because he worked somewhere else. She didn't know he was about to join her company and he hasn't told her and is about to meet up with her. Why not just meet at the office I Feel. He is managing it all on his personal email and meeting her outside work.

[beenherebefore]

I don't want to get in your head but to me all this situation sounds really suspicious. All the secrecy and dodgy behavior is putting me off and this doesn't seem like an innocent encounter at all.

[Asker]

no I agree thats why I posted this. thanks

[Nikki1989]

Yes, you are being insecure. Networking is standard business practice.

[Asker]

why can't he do it on zoom like he does with everyone else?

[NathanDavis]

yes, it is insecurity

but insecurities are also somewhat normal

if you don't trust the person you did marry to... then why did you marry him?

[Asker]

I trust him but I dont trust the behavior. It seems weird to meet some beautiful girl for lunch who is new is town and also a lot less senior than he is. For what? So he can be her hero.

[JesseP1nk]

Mmy yeah. If someone wants to cheat, then sooner or later they will find the way.

[Asker]

Well I dont know if he wants to cheat. Maybe he is just being good at his job. She works at a company that is good for him to stay connected to. I could be insecure

[Anonymous]

Wow you really are blind or in complete denial or sheer dumb. He wants to fuck her he wants to date her and fuck her have an affair behind your back

[Asker]

he's never even met her. She is new to the city. I am not sure he wants to fuck her as he hasn't even met her? lol but i am not in denial of something because I posted this question

[Opinion Owner]

Just because he hasn't met her doesn't mean he doesn't want to fuck her. Why else would he be meeting her to see her in person build a rapport with her then slide in further to fuck her. Christ it's textbook moves are you really that blind 🤣

[Opinion Owner]

He's not going to meet her for milk and cookies wake up He's doing it to build a rapport with her then he'll take it even further so he can fuck her that's why he's doing it in person. And it'll be over breakfast at some restaurant at first then lunch at some restaurant then dinner at some restaurant then fuck

[Asker]

My husband is not like this - he doesn't walk around thinking about where to next bang someone lol - if that were the case, he can fuck someone here. He is good looking and successful. He can just go pick up some girl here. No need to chase a woman moving here. I read linkedin messages, she messaged him first and he responded and offered to have a call. but then he ignored her for weeks and apologized as he was busy and to make it up to her he said he'd take her to lunch when she arrived and wished her good luck with her move and then said he's looking forward to meeting her. That is why I am insecure because he messaged her like while we are on vacation. BUT he told me about it so if he wanted to fuck her why tell me? He said he is meeting someone when we are back home

[Opinion Owner]

Lmfao go back and read what you saud and go back and read what i said... i pretty much called it breakfast lunch dinner then he'll fuck her. You are in denial land the wonderful world of denial... i wish i could say you were being ignorant about the whole thing but clearly you're not you're just in denial and trying so hard to make excuses for the upcoming cheating that your husband will do behind your back.

[Opinion Owner]

After he fucks her he'll come to you with some lame ass apology and say it just happened then he'll say it won't ever happen again.
The moment you said he's taking her to lunch and the moment you saud she was attractive i flat out called it and i don't even know you from a hole in the wall a complete stranger on the internet so what do i have to possibly gain from telling you what you already in your heart know whether you want to admit it or not

[Opinion Owner]

And the fact he's doing thatcon your vacation oh honey wake the hell up he obviously has this whole thing planned out in his head how he wants to cheat. You better start packing suit cases and looking for a divorce lawyer now because i don't know what else to tell you if you refuse to believe the red flags that are right in front of you

[Opinion Owner]

If you didn't think there was a possibility of him cheating you wouldn't be on here asking the questions that you did... but yet here you are so deep down whether you want to admit it or not you know he very well could be cheating with this woman

[Asker]

Im not saying I dont think it's possible something is off but I think your hypothesis is extreme that he is planning "breakfast, lunch dinner fuck" lol just because she is pretty?

[Asker]

I think it's possible he felt bad for ignoring her for weeks. He literally ignored her for 3 weeks then messaged her now to say he will take her to lunch and looks forward to it or something. I just thought why meet her at all, she was okay with Zoom from what I read. But then I saw how pretty she is and thats why I became uncomfortable. He also didn't tell me it's a girl - he said "someone" and "they". And he told her he's looking forward to meeting her which i also didn't like.

[Opinion Owner]

Why lie about it? Why cover it up? Look you gotta remember 4 basic words MEN ARE SIMPLE CREATURES if a woman is beautiful he'll want to "wine & dine" her then "fuck" her. Look i told you what's going to happen without reading any comments on here and you even said it yourself something didn't seem right. Just brace yourself in the near future when he tells you the classic "he slept with her and it was a one time thing and it will never happen again" at that point shove the divorce papers in his face make him sign it and leave and don't look back

[Asker]

well i mean there are several beautiful women in the world lol so it doesn't make sense to suddenly feel the need to jump after one beautiful girl moving to town. He could have done this with others. And I dont think all men are such animals they jump on every girl they find attractive.

[Asker]

also she could not be interested in him that way and just want to be close to his professional power

[Opinion Owner]

Wow the denial is strong with you

[Asker]

lol you think my husband hasn't seen beautiful women before? Why this one? You wrote as if men go after every beautiful woman in the world uncontrollably. If that were true, he'd of already been cheating on me and every man would cheat without any discipline or integrity. I didn't say it wasn't off - thats why i posted, but the idea that just because she's pretty he must want her is a bit of a stretch.

[Opinion Owner]

Now let me ask you this... who are you really trying to convince me or yourself?

[Asker]

I’m coming back again lol because I looked again and they’re emailing. As it turns out she is joining HIS company. He has a new job and she didn’t know that’s at first so the conversation looked like she was discussing another company but she’s joining his company and he hasn’t even told her? He knows but didn’t tell her and he’s now offering to help her and they’re meeting for breakfast in a week outside of work. Why wouldn’t he just say he joined the same company she is at? He used to work there and he’s rejoined 6 months ago but she doesn’t know that.

[Opinion Owner]

Are you ready to face reality yet? He wants to fuck her

[Asker]

Can you please tell me why you think that? No joking. Why would you think he wants to fuck her based on what I wrote? Just because she's attractive and is offering to meet? People network. So I am genuinely asking, do you think my husband wants to fuck this woman because she's pretty and he is having coffee with her? Or is there something else I have said? n For me- I was jealous to see him offering to meet in person as she is so pretty but i am suspicious of his intentions because he joined a new company 2 months ago and that is HER employer - he has not told her that and so he is using his personal email to message her when he could just meet het AT WORK in their offices but instead if asking her to meet at a coffee shop outside work. He is also offering to introduce her to people and help her career and he doesn't even know her. like be her hero

[Opinion Owner]

Look I've told you 20+ times now the bottom line is YOU'RE STILL IN DENIAL and until you see the bigger picture and stop arguing with me on this and see this from an outside perspective you're still going to be narrowly minded with how you see this and that is in DENIAL MODE.
Listen lady i don't know you from a fucking hole in the wall and i already told you 20+ times what i think now unless you're trolling which at this point you probably are because no one can be this fucking stupid then just leave me the hell alone until you snap yourself out of your denial bullshit or quot trolling

[Asker]

lol ok - for the record im not trolling. in your last comments you said men are simply creatures which to me sounded like if a girl is pretty men just want them physically. I think men dont just hump everything they see - you dont right? So I asked you specifically based on what I wrote and not based on just mens nature which is what I gathered from your responses but ok

[Opinion Owner]

Most men just do want to hump as in your husband with that woman few men don't and looking for more

[Asker]

lol you may find funny to know he just updated his instagram and facebook photos to just him and our child. it used to be the three of us and he changed it TODAY to just him and our child, one day after confirming plans to meet his new friend lol maybe he is up to something

[Opinion Owner]

🤦‍♀️🤦🤦‍♂️🙄🥱👌👋

[slatyb]

Seems normal to me.

[Asker]

how?

[slatyb]

I mean your feeling is normal.

[Asker]

oh ok thanks