What to do? He reject me but keep staring at me!?!

[Anonymous]

Hi guys I really need your help her this story is dragging for so long almost 2 years iam tired. Basically this is my story I met these guy while working for his sister immediately there was this connection spending a lot of time talking to each other whenever I'm or he enter a room 1st thing is looking for each other sometimes it was like 2 magnets attract to each other : in a room full of people we managed to be lost in each other eyes and talk without saying a word. Every time I turn is to find staring at me. After sometime when I finish working for his sister I send him a message through Facebook actually this how we stayed in contact when we couldn't see each other, so I told him that I like him I told me he KNEW it but he is COMMITED to someone and he wants us to be friend. I was like what the...And just shattered. every time his sister needs me I see him like 2-3 times a year when we met I feel awkward but after few minutes it's like before talking ,eye-lock in our own world. I forgot to say when I told him about my feelings he stop answer to my messages on FB but every time we met he is the one who come to me kiss me on the cheeks or call me when I "didn't " see (trying to avoid him) I just love him so much I can't even date someone else. WHAT to DO? I will spend one week with his family in June I need an advice by then please . Desperate shattered heartbroken woman. X

[pj411985]

I feel your pain;; It must be worse that you're in love with him without your permission. I've, too, met someone and fall hard for him-- too fast too soon. We're both committed with someone else. When we're in the same room if we didn't talk, we communicated just by staring and got lost in each other eyes. The attraction was always there; I don't think I'd ever attracted strongly to any man like that before or will again. As you described "like 2 magets attract each other" and unfortuately there's little you could do. Whatever you intend to do just remember few things:

1. Don't cheapen yourself for his sake, know your worth, DONT LOSE yourself for any man

2. Don't Compromise yourself, accepting the reality that he's already committed to someone else and he's not planing to leave her for you - YET. If he does, rest assured he'll do same to you

3 Be good to yourself. There is someone else out there better for you

I know you have loved him and always will.. My advise is to distant yourself as possibly as you can. I know it's hard ... Gradually you will miss or yarn for him less, and love him with less intensity. In the meantime, don't stop living your life just becasue you have this unwanted setback. Go out and have fun even if your heart aches for him. Good luck

[Asker]

thank you! I can't believe it someone who understand me: some so called friends advice me to be is mistress definitely no-no. every time I say that's it! its when I dream about him like we are together at parties etc... you know its been almost 2 years now I really need to move on. but something still eke me attached one way or another.

[pj411985]

You deserve BETTER than be someone's mistress or someone's second choice... If you two are meant to be destined together, God will find a way for you to be together ---no but about it.Two years are a long time it is simply because you genuinely love him; true love doesn't distinguish easily. I bet you love him more if not less simply because he's committed with someone else and has no intention to hurt her so he that can be with you.. Unfortunately, he's not free to be yours even if you both wish2

[pj411985]

You will go on because you know it's the fair thing to do. You won't forget him for you're bound together in spirit. Live your life and cherish the rare and beautiful memories you created together; it should gives you the courage to look forward to something meaning and beautiful out there

[funtasy]

You know he's committed and need to assume that it won't change reguardless of what you do. Now, do you want to keep going? I think that is what a person has to determine as an individual. Forget what others think, just what you want. That's the thing that matters when all is said and done. I would caution you that should you get in a situation to take the relationship farther (sexual) you need to also look at it as if it's worth losing your guy or you feelings getting hurt and/or both. Don't know what he defines committed as...but my opinion is: for his future possible respect, should you want to hold out, and hope the opportunity someday presents itself to find the two of you in a relationship, your going to have to wait it out and conserve your outward or spoken feeling for now...to have a real chance later (if that ever happens at all).

I know there's still not an answer here however, no one can sort anothers feelings...so your going to have to find the answers inside yourself.

Remember, short term rewards seldom have long term return, Long term investments more often than not hold future rewards. Tough situation when attraction is obvious...! ! !

Wish you the best.

[Asker]

hi thank you for your advice. he is saudi :people from gulf countries it's another rule and way to live. IAM NOT INTERESTED TO BECOME HIS MISTRESS this is against my education. but in really know I've got feeling for him and him too maybe you are right I need to be patient. thanks take care

[yopyopyop]

So you told him you liked him, he said no, and stopped communication.

But then, when you see each other, there is still the spark.

Looks to me you're a plan B to him, or a way to escape his daily routine using the mind connection routes.

Anyway, there is very little to no chance anything will happen, physically.

Next time you see him, refuse the eye contact. Just talk on a strictly professional level. Take you distances.

If he really likes you, he will work harder. If he doesn't like you, it will help you to move on.

If it happened to me (turning down a woman), I would certainly not torture her like he does with you.

Don't be his toy any longer !

[Asker]

thank you for your advice, actually yu are right when you say I am being his toy. Again I can go to another relationship unfortunately for me when I love someone I am faithful being with him or not.

about being strictly professional I tried to ignore him HE is the one call me to say hi or whatever. but I will try again. thanks take care!