Polls: Relationships

DISGUSTING. Asking women to commit to them just to break their OWN commitment and cheat.

A narcissist, on the surface, is a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves. They often come as the most "charming" people around you & someone who never fails to NOT mention anything good they've been doing. Narcissists are not secure people and the "self interest and excessive admiration" that shows, is usually stemming from a deep deep insecurity. They have an insatiable need of people's (collectively, never a single person) validation, to feel valued. 'Never a single person' cuz they usually cannot care about anyone particular other than themselves. A lot of times they're just BLIND to see the harm they cause to the ones they "care" about (covert nar.). Their reasonings can be anything, at any level, to justify their own selves and their actions. They can never be argued with bcz their minds are incapable of seeing their own self at the 'wrong'. They have to "win". They live to win, "reputation" is the most important thing to them. They're incapable of being vulnerable (could be cuz of a past trauma) to others. They leech out the people they're with, if you've been through that mental exhaustion. They all have pretty much the same patterns. If you've been one of their victims, you can pick out those patterns easily. Manipulations, gaslighting, not being truthful, conditioning, twisting words are just few ways. I wish you all the best on your healing journey & hopefully (not smth good), those triggers are strong enough that you never trust such person again.
(my personal view of them 👆 you may correct me/or add to this (if u want to) but be polite)

Optional:
Provide reason in comment section.

Do you ever doubt them, even just small doubts?

If no then share what made you believe this or come to realise of this (when/how). But if yes, then be open & support your response with your experience😊

So most people agree that a "red flag" is not negotiable. What if you can fix it?

Example: He/She is horrible with finances or money. That might be a red flag for some. Others might think I can work with that and help them.

Your thoughts...

My husband and I have been married only two years, we have arguments constantly because we are both alphas and he always thinks it’s his way that matters only. He also is a hypocrite, he can do things but if I was too all hell would break loose. Lately I’ve been catching myself looking at other men or thinking what life would be like with them or what it would be like to have sex with them. My husband and I rarely have sex because he’s always too busy or tired and quite frankly when we do I can’t wait until it’s over. It’s just so blah. This have never been an issue before but it’s making me second guess everything, I feel completely wrong for having these thoughts but there’s a devil on my shoulder telling me to act on it. Advice?

I (white female) have been with my boyfriend (mixed race male) for 5 years. Every now and again people have called me a race traitor, which I find hurtful. I was wondering if the demographic here agrees or if it’s a safe space?

Do you think this would have a significant impact on your self understanding & perhaps your views on other things as well, without engagement from other people?